Here we are, once again. Smackdown time. What type of show will we get with a kind-of-returning Jerry Lawler? Probably one involving a robot in the main event against a concussion victim? You guessed it, let’s hop to it shall we?
We open with a recap of Austin Aries presenting Hogan with Option C which is then followed up with the Claire Lynch saga. AH TNA my bi-polar enjoyment.
That says it all
Sorry no pics to entertain. Just a very disappointed feeling. BFG was mediocre to say the least. I watched in quick succession as (this includes a preshow) where two titles are forever tarnished. A bi polar face change. And a good match from two men. One who is known for phoning it in and the other who was with the company before but left. The continued embarrassment of Samoa Joe, which now includes Matt Morgan. This folks was Bound For Glory.
Lets start with the bad please.
(bleep) it. The worst abomination known to humanity. If you’re a female this should set you back 200 years, when you ancestors wore corsets and stood quietly by as they had no voting rights. THIS MATCH ALMOST MADE ME UTTER THE MOST HATED (American)TERM THAT BEGINS WITH A “C” AT MY MONITOR.
We watch Karen Jarrett officiate a debacle of a match. So bad that the Philly crowd was chanting “BORING”! Wheres Mickie James stood in the middle of the ring and shouted with irritated conviction “Come On” Which got a momentary acknowledgement from the crowd. This match is the classically stated overbooking everyone talks about, you have 4 competitors, a special guest referee, Outside interference, and a heel ref bump that leads to a babyface ref coming out to count the three! With all of this the match was still a horrid mess. I honestly believe the crowd only cheered because it was finally over. It would be akin to be a Vietnam war prisoner with the bamboo beneath the finger nails and when they finally finished you congratulated your captors.
Lets just look at the players.
Madison Rayne- One of the worst heels in the business, and not in a good way a heel should be bad. Even as she descended the ramp I heard no crowd reaction other than crickets and people getting around to their bathroom breaks. The Killer Queen title fits seeing as how she killed the crowd.
Velvet Sky- Miss Retcon herself. Who is now a baby-face for no reason other than they had no other popular female “wrestlers” and I use that term loosely. She gets a good pop but that is because she is the lesser of two evils. Men supposedly according to Taz “Let the pigeons loose” in her presence. That is no different than watching your favorite porn star, but you watch her in a non wrestling element, not in a wrestling ring!
Mickie James- Someone who at least no matter how awkwardly she looks attempts to put on a show. The former stripper attempted to keep the show grounded but was overshadowed by her protege Velvet.
Finally the Champion Winter, the batshit crazy Lesbian Vampire Brit who spits blood. That would be a long title for a movie. Who came out to confusion. Someone who if she wasn’t saddled with a crap gimmick would be a perfect snobbish heel. But I digress, In all this mess I was actually rooting for Winter! The booking for this match is simple Velvet (shudder) vs Winter w/Angelina. If Sky wins she gets her friend back, and sadly a title. But no we get padding for an already sad match.
Someone on another site posted how two of the best female wrestlers in the company Tara and Sarita were otherwise pre disposed. Sadly that is the state of the division if you have talent you get buried for looks. Velvet Sky namesake aside is a glorified valet who was given a devalued trinket to a once promising division. A belt I might add two years ago wouldn’t even be considered an option for heel jobber Sky. Amazingly a regime change and a massive exodus later she now has no barrier to the title.
Anderson and Ray was excellent even with the missed spot. Ray has experience never mined in WWE. The way he turned that crowd against him was gold. He essentially sold Anderson as the fan favorite in a town he helped put on the map.
Bi-Polar moments astound me in wrestling. First we have Sting go all crazy then we have Hogan after losing to Sting listening to the Hulkamaniacs and changing allegiances taking out all of jobber Immortal? They’ve signed new contracts, Hogan and Bischoff, so now what we have two more years of Hogan now face running around in the Red and Yellow fighting Immortal and Eric Bischoff? So much for the youth movement. Sadly it was quoted that the Hogan change was similar to Return of Jedi, as Luke (Sting) pleaded with Vader (Hogan) to help him in his fight with Immortal (Emperor) yes it was a blatant rip off that even with the crowd reaction Hogan had already ruined it in interviews prior to BFG answering that we (fans) would see the red and yellow soon. Yippee.
Joe jobbing is enough said for me. Even the fans booed when the winner was declared.
RVD tried and I mean actually attempted to put on a good match. He won which still shows that back stage politics still work when it comes to Rob.
The never ending Daniels vs AJ feud is still continuing. The theme music that played during their feud video even made no sense when it came to the lyrics. Title winning before one dies? There was no belt on the line. If that is the case then why not give either one the Television title because god forbid Eric Young isn’t using it. Weak finish ruined this match.
Preshow on Facebook came across as one would expect. No title change. Christina Von Eerie or as she is known in TNA as Toxin was ehh. She did her job of awkwardly (there’s that word again) taking out two women motioned to the crowd turned scratched Anarquia’s eyes and depantsed him. Still this tomfoolery is better suited for RAW not for TNA Impact “Where Wrestling Matters, Again”. Bush league at best. Hence why we got it for Free.
All I can say about the Bobby Roode title match is Bullshit!!!!!!!!! A sad month of hype. A retconned back story (remember Bobby was a JBL style wrestler with money who had Traci Brooks and Eric Young in his back pocket?) I don’t either because he is Rocky Balboa. He is built up and then after a 15 minute match where similar moves were repeated over and over ended with Apollo Creed (Angle) winning in questionable fashion because you know the referee is blind. This is a crazy epidemic in TNA, this blind referee syndrome. At first I thought it was just Earl Hebner but I guess it is hereditary because Brian Hebner let Kurt rob Bobby. Don’t get me wrong Roode was booked all wrong.
First we have the Bound for Glory Series where we are treated to various contenders who all are given the wink wink of moving forward. Crimson with his undefeated streak looked like a winner but was kayfabe taken out. RVD was screwed by Lynn. Bully Ray just couldn’t get the job done. Gunner tapped. Storm choked. Pope and Joe didn’t stand a chance after their lackluster feud. But there was one man who was waiting for his chance to become the champion, a man that had promised by the end of the year to be TNA World Champion. His name was……Matt Morgan! He was in prime condition to be the next big main event guy. He had paid his dues in the company and was basically homegrown. A WWE Jobber who was stuck with a gimmick no one would want. Who after coming to TNA grew into a fan favorite even when he was a heel. Then an injury happened and he was shelved then taken off the shelf to feud with Joe the perennial wrestler a man creative must love to torment with all the different reinventions they’ve attempted since his loss to Angle. And while they were at it they threw in the “Undefeated” Crimson, Philly and fans were not amused. So what do we have instead? Kurt wins the title from Sting. Aligns with Hogan after some asinine plot point about Dixie knowing Jarrett and Karen were a couple before he did. He turns around and puts down the young talent. A complete U turn from a couple years ago. Roode default wins BFG series and we get a month of Rocky vignettes. And a screw finish that would make Bret Hart blush. Thank you TNA.
Finally we have Aries vs Kendrick, a match that was first on the show and easily outshined most. The crowd was thoroughly behind Aries who proves once again what kind of presence he brings to any company. Dejected by ROH, WWE and if I remember correctly Chikara but when he returned to Impact Wrestling he cut one simple promo and was a “star” once more. Him having that belt gives more credence to it than a thousand Brian Kendricks. The man who in July saved the division from the Monster Abyss sank into oblivion once Austin Aries came on the scene. Kendrick may be talented but he always came across as a better tag partner than a full fledged solo star. A Marty Jannety who needed his Michaels (Paul London) Because to make matters worse he is the basic definition of a “vanilla midget” not much of a personality. They give him the Wizard of Odd gimmick the same they gave Amazing Red the color red as his. Coat him in any guise and he is still just vanilla. You have a division that includes Kid Kash, Zima Ion, Alex Shelley,Jesse Sorenson (who needs a better gimmick than a “Alex Riley” FCW run) and if they’re smart Eric Young. All these guys albeit Sorenson look to be able to run with the ball against Aries. To but asses in seats as it were. Now that the feud is over we can get an Alex Shelley feud with Aries. They have a shared history in the company and beyond.
Hopefully BFG is an eye opener for management to get their ducks in a row and move past this sub par PPV. This is the Starrcade of TNA make it mean as much. You can’t cheer home grown talent if you don’t push them properly. Look at Hogan for instance for a good year or so in WWF he was the man who worked his way with the crowd to a good build up against a credible heel before winning and defending against Andre and so forth. Meaning he was built up a winner someone the fans could cheer and love. Simple booking where the heels were the heels and the faces were the faces. No retcons. Especially in this internet savvy century.
The week is winding down, and it’s time to join your Empress of “iMPACT” and cross the line!
TNA “No Surrender” Predictions
World Heavyweight Championship match
Sting vs. AJ Styles vs. Matt Morgan vs. Kurt Angle (ch)
JT: Matt Morgan – TNA needs to go for it and put the belt on him now. He wins by pinning either Sting or AJ Styles.
ThinkSoJoE: Gotta go with Angle here – Sting and AJ are “Bound for Glory” bound, Morgan isn’t ready for it yet.
The Green Teabagger: Matt Morgan reveals he was with Angle all along and helps Angle retain The Precious. Sounds like another addition to The Intro!
Legend Killer: Kurt Angle. Do you really see Matt Morgan winning?
Drowgoddess: AJ Styles to win, because he and Sting can still fight at BFG with AJ being the champ. The guy carried the company since the very first day, and he is long overdue to have the gold that proves it. AJ is not the future of wrestling, he has been the present of wrestling for the past seven years. I just hope against hope that Matt Morgan doesn’t turn out to be on Angle’s side after all. For one thing, we’ve already seen that when Samoa Joe joined the MEM and handed Angle the title. For the other thing, people are going crazy in a good way over Morgan blatantly playing games with Angle, and a swerve for the sake of a swerve will only destroy Morgan’s momentum and connection with the fans.
“The Boss” Bobby Lashley vs. “The War Machine” Rhino
JT: Lashley – It’s his first ppv match since joining TNA, no way he’s gonna lose.
ThinkSoJoE: Lashley. They’re going to put that much hype behind the Bruce Springsteen wannabe to have him job to the War Machine? Psh.
The Green Teabagger: Yeah, like Rhino has a chance. Rhino was forgotten until they needed someone to take a dive for a part-timer. Reality check: Barring injury, stupid shit, or Angle getting thrown in jail, the main event at BFG 5 is Angle-Lashley for the title. Lashley is going into that undefeated, but it will probably be his third match in TNA. Next month, he’ll probably be facing Homicide.
Legend Killer: Black Lesnar. Have this guy, that you’re hyping up to be the cornerstone of the company, then have him lose in his first match.
Drowgoddess: Everybody, even a pygmy deaf-mute in the Amazonian rain forest, knows that Lashley is winning this match. Lashley is the latest ex-WWE savior of TNA, and as such, will be absolutely dominant until he finally fights Kurt Angle.
X-Division Championship match
Daniels vs. Samoa Joe (ch)
JT: Joe – Wait, is this a feud??? Wow, this shows how much attention I pay to iMPACT! every week. I don’t see Samoa Joe losing the title anytime soon.
ThinkSoJoE: Joe. For no other reason than Joe is gonna kill you.
The Green Teabagger: I’d like Daniels to win the title and go on to a feud with The Pope D’Angelo Dinero. Right, like the MEM is giving up a belt, but this would be the one they lose if they do lose any of them anytime soon. Samoa Joe retains.
Legend Killer: Samoa Joe. Daniels wants to bring the X-Division back, but Joe’s only held the belt a month.
Drowgoddess: I could go either way in this match and be happy, but Samoa Joe retains here. Daniels SHOULD win the X-Division title, but the timing may not be right.
“Lethal Lockdown” tag team cage match
Beer Money vs. The British Invasion vs. Team 3D vs. Scott Steiner & Booker T (ch)
JT: British Invasion – There’s a Lethal Lockdown match??? I seriously didn’t know about this one until this week’s iMPACT!, but since they’re trying to tease a feud between the MEM and the British Invasion, I’ll go with them.
ThinkSoJoE: BEER MONEY!
The Green Teabagger: No titles are on the line, so Beer Money and Team 3-D win this match. That way, it looks “balanced.” :/
Legend Killer: Team 3D and Beer Money Inc. Three words. Beer Money Inc.
Drowgoddess: I’m still confused about this match. I thought that it was a four-way match for the tag team titles in a cage, under “Lethal Lockdown” rules. Now, it seems to be a non-title match with two teams of four. The website and the tv program are not in alignment on this! Either Beer Money wins or The British Invasion (in the form of Brutus Magnus) steals a third pin and victory from Steiner and Booker.
“$50,000 Bounty vs. Legends Championship” match
Abyss vs. Kevin Nash (ch)
JT: Nash (as long as he doesn’t get injured walking to the ring or boning fat chicks) – Dr. Stevie gets involved, Nash wins.
ThinkSoJoE: If the title is on the line, Nash. If not, Abyss.
The Green Teabagger: I want Abyss to win the Legends Title. That said, I almost expect Foley to either insert himself into this match at the last moment to make it a Triple Threat. Either way, if Nash shows up, he wins.
Legend Killer: Abyss. You watch Foley interfere in this one. I say Abyss, just so it pisses off Foley. However, Nash claims the bounty.
Drowgoddess: I’m not terribly excited about this match. No way is Nash losing. Mick Foley and Dr. Stevie will likely get involved, somehow.
Knockouts Championship match (title is held up)
ODB vs. Cody Deaner
JT: ODB – The women’s title should be on a woman, not a man, enough said.
ThinkSoJoE: Given the fact that every Knockout beat the crap out of Deaner this past Thursday, going with ODB.
The Green Teabagger: If there is a just and loving God, ODB will win this match. I’m still picking Cody Deaner because Russo has the book.
Legend Killer: Cody Deaner. Because TNA are that retarded to do that.
Drowgoddess: ODB has got to win. End this horribly unfunny abomination of allowing Cody Deaner to cheapen a title that actually did mean something!
Finals of the Knockouts tag team championship tournament
The Beautiful People vs. Taylor Wilde & Sarita
JT: The Beautiful People – Don’t really have a reason why, just picking them.
ThinkSoJoE: I’m going with Taylor and Sarita for the sheer fact that Angelina Love won’t be there.
The Green Teabagger: The Beautiful People….Vel Vel and 🙁 Madison Rayne, subbing for Angelina Love. Because it’s as close to the assumed original plan as they can, Rayne and Vel Vel with the Knockouts Tag Team Titles. They will still be more legit tag champions than The British Invasion.
Legend Killer: Taylor/Sarita. Considering one of their opponents no longer works for the company, I’d say it’s a good bet.
Drowgoddess: Taylor Wilde and Sarita should win, but the only reason that Madison Rayne got back together with The Beautiful People is because Angelina Love won’t be at the ppv. That’s quite a lot of trouble to go to unless the only plan is to have The Beautiful People win. Therefore, I’m predicting a Velvet Sky/Madison Rayne victory.
Grudge match
Eric Young vs. Hernandez
JT: Hernandez – I think everyone knows how much I hate Eric Young, so yeah, my pick might be a little biased, but I’m sticking to it.
ThinkSoJoE: EY will take this one, likely with help from Homicide.
The Green Teabagger: Eric Young wins with a combination of cheating, chairs, and a piledriver. JT will probably say, “Fuck Eric Young!” before, during, and after. I will be watching the New York Giants dissect the Dallas Cowboys.
Legend Killer: Hernandez. Even with Homicide in his corner, the chum for Team Canada has no chance.
Drowgoddess: I don’t hate Eric Young. I think he’s doing the best work of his career, and the “cheap knock-off of Chris Jericho” accusations really aren’t fair. Hernandez has destroyed all of World Elite that have challenged him thus far, so Eric Young has to win, by hook or by crook.
The BWF staff has spoken! Join us for full coverage of “No Surrender,” and see who was right.