Normally I end my intro blah’s with “hopping time” or some variation of such. Nope. Not so much this week.

See, See? You killed him.
Gravity wins again. It’s falling down time smarks, hit the link below. I get progressively angrier and jaded during this review. Maybe it’s just this week, maybe it’s not. The ball is in the WWE’s court on this one…
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 05/17/13: Extreme Rules Go Away Show”
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Beefaroni, Booker T, British Bulldog, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Calgary Alberta, Canadian Wrestler, Cardiac Arrest, Charles Barkley, Chef Boyardee, Closed Captioning, CM Punk, Concussed, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Del Rio, Disinterest, Dollar Man, Extreme Rules, Fandango, Frisbees, Grock, Hogan, James Storm, Jerry Lawler, Jinder, John Cena, Kane, Lucha Mask, Many Moons, Meat Products, Mick Foley, Mickie Rourke, Miz Tv, Mork, Occassionally, Paul Heyman, Play By Play, Randall Keith Orton, Randy Orton, Ravioli, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ring Apron, Rivals, Ryback, Smarks, Spork, Steve Austin, Strawberry Yogurt, super-soaker filled with motor oil, Swagger, Team Canada, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Tv Segment, wwe, Ziggler | Leave a commentWell, here we are again. Friday. Smackdown. Ratings are slumping for all things wrestling, as they tend to do in the summer time (Except TNA, of course, their ratings never change). Things like NHL and NBA playoffs don’t help either. But since it’s too late to watch any games, I certainly have the time to watch Smackdown. Boy, do I sound enthusiastic.

Hopping Time!
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 05/10/13″
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Basket Ball, Blood Stain, Booker T, Brain Matter, British Bulldog, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Calgary Alberta, Canadian Wrestler, Cardiac Arrest, Charles Barkley, Closed Captioning, CM Punk, Comic Strip, Commin, Crossbow, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dinner Tonight, Dollar Man, Dribble, Eet, Fandango, Frisbees, Grock, Hungry Man Dinner, James Storm, Jerry Lawler, Jinder, John Cena, Kane, Mickie Rourke, Montreal Canadiens, Mork, Mountie, NBA Playoffs, Paul Heyman, Play By Play, Quebecois, Randall Keith Orton, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ring Apron, Ryback, Spork, St Louis Blues, Steve Austin, Strawberry Yogurt, Summer Time, super-soaker filled with motor oil, Swagger, Team Canada, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Time Brian, TNA, Whizzes, Yoinks, Zombified | Leave a commentAs I’m running a late today, no intro hooplah, jibbah jabbah, preambling. There shall be hopping however, and that’s your cue.
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 5/3/13″
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Animated Gif, Booker T, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Charles Barkley, Cliche, CM Punk, Cue, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dazzler, Ears, Extreme Rules, Godzilla, Hogan, Hungry Man Dinner, Jerry Lawler, John Cena, Kane, Left Eye, Mouths, Paul Heyman, Play By Play, Powermoves, Randall Keith Orton, Renee, Ribs, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ryback, Saying Nothing, Sd C, Segments, Shaq Fu, Shellshock, Steel Post, super-soaker filled with motor oil, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Twist And Turn, Zeb | 1 CommentHey! They’re in the U.K.! Also known as forced attempts to recreate the chants on RAW after WrestleMania 29 Land! YEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH! Has anyone else noticed they changed Fandango’s music and added crowd noise? I did. Let’s get to “entertainment you” of a show. Hopefully Shannon Moore makes a surprise return? Only one way to find out. So step up on that stool and strap on your noose , folks…. It’s hopping time!
Ok, it can’t be THAT bad. Nobody kill yourself, it’s just fucking wrestling. Go bitch about it on the internet like everybody else. That’s how we roll, peeps.
In all seriousness, there will be a much watch match on this show, as you probably already know.

Smackdown time… I guess.
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 04/26/13″
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Ambrose, Booker T, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Chants, Charles Barkley, CM Punk, Crowd Noise, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Deadman, Del Rio, Extreme Rules, Fandango, Hilarity, Jerry Lawler, John Cena, Kane, Land Shark, Maam, Meltzer, Mystery Voice, Noose, Paul Heyman, Play By Play, Randall Keith Orton, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ryback, Seriousness, Shannon Moore, super-soaker filled with motor oil, Surprise Return, Swagger, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Two Friends, Wrestlemania | Leave a comment
YAY!!!
Stuff goes here. Hopping time!
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 04/19/13″
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Assholes, Basket Ball, Booker T, Boston Bombings, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Calgary Alberta, Cardiac Arrest, Charles Barkley, Closed Captioning, CM Punk, Damien Sandow, Dancing Girl, Daniel Bryan, Del Rio, Dingo, Dollar Man, Downfall, Dribble, Fake Fight, Fandango, Frisbees, Grand Entrance, Grock, Healthy Diet, Hogan, Holy Shit, James Storm, Jerk, Jerry Lawler, Jinder, John Cena, Kane, Lilian Garcia, Mickie Rourke, Mork, Music Hits, Paul Heyman, Peaceful Life, Play By Play, Randall Keith Orton, Randy Orton, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ring Apron, Ryback, Sexual Harassment Charges, Spork, Steve Austin, Strawberry Yogurt, super-soaker filled with motor oil, Swagger, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Those Guys | Leave a commentOn RAW, the crowd made the difference for the show to be a winner, ultimately, which I suspect and hope will remain a tradition as the so-called “hardcore” smarks stick around for it. Will that many of them stick around for Smackdown? I’d like to think so… but this “thing” is still a new “thing.” Only one way to find out, and you know what that means. Into the back of the closet and into Narnia, kiddo, we’re hunting wabbits. Hopping time! (a.k.a. Beer will make this better).

The customary hand wave after a goal is scored.
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 04/12/13″
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Basket Ball, Biggie Smalls, Bob Dylan, Booker T, Briefcase, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Burrito, Calgary Alberta, Charles Barkley, Closed Captioning, CM Punk, Coulter, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dollar Man, Dribble, Fandango, Frisbees, Grock, Hogan, James Storm, Jerry Lawler, Jinder, John Cena, Kane, Kiddo, Krusty Burger, Last Monday, Mickie Rourke, Mma, Mork, Narcolepsy, Next Card, Oilers, Paul Heyman, Play By Play, Public Apology, Randall Keith Orton, Rap Battle, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ryback, Spaghetti, Spork, Steve Austin, Strawberry Yogurt, super-soaker filled with motor oil, Swagger, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Turban, World Heavyweight Champion, Wrestlemania, Ziggler | Leave a commentThe only new content on this show was taped around RAW this week, and the rest will likely be all hype, zombie attacks and video packages towards Mania. Hence, this review should be really short. Probably like one jump. Not even hopping, just hop. Now get to it and click that hyperlink below…

That’s what it’s called.
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 04/05/13: CLIP SHOW FOR ALL!”
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Articulation, Billy Kidman, Booker T, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Caterer, Charles Barkley, CM Punk, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Double Shell, Epico, Flowchart, Food Taste, Hampshire England, Heyman, Hogan, Inxs, Jerry Lawler, John Cena, Kane, Last Friday, Massages, Parsley, Paul Heyman, Personal Space, Play By Play, Playah, Puerto Rican Food, Punk, Randall Keith Orton, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, rock, Ryback, Shell Shock, super-soaker filled with motor oil, tag team match, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Undertaker, Video Packages, Vince McMahon, WrestleMania 29, Zombie Attacks | Leave a commentYou would have thought that the WWE would have promoted the fact that the Rock was appearing on Smackdown tonight. Nope. They kind of forgot to do that. Yet they spoil other outcomes on the same program on their website. Weird. I mean it’s Smackdown, it’s not like we’re getting a surprise return or anything either… right? Something about hopping time.
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 03/29/13″
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Announcer Guy, Attention Shoppers, Basket Ball, Booker T, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Calgary Alberta, Candy Ass, Candy Bar, Cardiac Arrest, Catch Phrase, Charles Barkley, Closed Captioning, CM Punk, Crack Addicts, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dollar Man, Dribble, Fandango, Frisbees, Fruity Pebbles, Grock, James Storm, Jerry Lawler, Jinder, John Cena, Kane, Loyal Customers, Main Event, Mickie Rourke, Mork, Mt Etna, Paul Heyman, Personal Ring, Pet Rocks, Play By Play, Pompeii, Race Cards, Randall Keith Orton, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ring Apron, Ryback, SmackDown, Spoiler Alert, Spork, Steve Austin, Strawberry Yogurt, super-soaker filled with motor oil, Surprise Return, Swagger, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Walmart, wwe | Leave a commentOh hey, Smackdown is on again. Do YOU know what that means?

YES!
I see. Hopping time, then.
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 03/22/13″
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Antonio Cesaro {C} vs. The Miz, Apparition, Basket Ball, Beret, Bicker, Booker T, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Calgary Alberta, Cardiac Arrest, Career Goal, Charles Barkley, Chicken Alfredo, Chris Jericho, Chris Jericho vs. Jack Swagger, Closed Captioning, CM Punk, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dollar Man, Dolph Ziggler, Fandango, Frisbees, Grock, James Storm, Jerry Lawler, Jinder, John Cena, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler, Kojak, Little Ghost, Man Servant, Man Tag, Mark Henry, Mickie Rourke, Miz Tv, Mork, Mortals, Own Man, Pancake, Pasta Sauce, Paul Heyman, Personal Trainer, Play By Play, Randall Keith Orton, Randy Orton, Ravioli, Raw Deal Card Game, Rhodes Scholars vs. Brodus Clay & Sweet T, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ring Apron, Ryback, Sheamus & Big Show vs. 3MB, SmackDown, Spork, Steve Austin, Strawberry Yogurt, super-soaker filled with motor oil, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Zack Ryder, Zack Ryder vs. Mark Henry | Leave a commentStep 1: Steal a time machine
Step 2: Go back to the 1980′s and find yourself a Pogoball
Step 3: It’s hopping time, motherfuckers.
Let’s do this shit.
Click to continue reading “Smackdown 03/15/13: You Probably Should’ve Watched This Episode, Jerk.”
Posted in SmackDown | Tagged 6 Million Dollar Man, Abomination, Adr, AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Ancient Cave, Basket Ball, Booker T, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Calgary Alberta, Cardiac Arrest, Cave Painting, Charles Barkley, Closed Captioning, CM Punk, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dollar Man, Fandango, Frisbees, Gimmick, Grock, James Storm, Jerk, Jerry Lawler, Jinder, John Cena, Kane, Last Monday, Maddox, Mickie Rourke, Mork, New Age Outlaws, Papal Decision, Paul Bearer, Paul Heyman, Play By Play, Randall Keith Orton, Randy Orton, Red Button, Ric-Rod, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ring Apron, Ryback, SmackDown, Spork, Step 3, Steve Austin, Strawberry Yogurt, super-soaker filled with motor oil, Swagger, Tactical Armor, Team Omega, The Ghost of Teddy Long, the rock, Time Machine, Utility Belts, White Smoke, Youtube | Leave a comment ← Older posts