BoredWrestlingFan.com

R.I.P. Luna Vachon.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

[Joker voice] And here we…go!

This week’s “Impact” felt like a complete waste of time in so many ways. Reviewing it in the traditional manner simply isn’t possible, as the questions and comments floating around my brain far outweighed all attempts at even-handedness.

Find the nearest line and cross it, peeps! Your Empress of “Impact,” your Girly Parts Jesus, the one who suffers through this programming so that you don’t have to, is ready to lead you. Precisely where, I have no idea.

[Joker voice/] And here we … go!

Hey, everybody! I’m back! Expect more articles soon, as there’s plenty of ammunition these days. Extra credit to anyone who understands the history reference.

Eric Bischoff has recently chosen to promote the on-line video stylings of a few mouth-breathing, window-licking examples of why Charles Darwin was wrong. No one who gleefully cheers direct chair shots to the head as a good reason to watch a particular pro wrestling show is truly a fan of pro wrestling, nor should the comments of any such person be given any consideration. In the hope of countering the shameful inanity spouted in these video clips (I’m not going to dignify them with direct links), listing eight good reasons to watch TNA was the original plan here. It would be fantastic to do so, but the sad fact is that eight good reasons to watch TNA simply no longer exist. If Eric Bischoff and Dixie Carter are such fans of internet feedback, and are truly concerned about the abysmal ratings of their televised product, they both need to look to a more recent past than the one that they continue to forcefeed to the few remaining poor saps who actually tune in to watch “Impact” on Monday nights. The things that made TNA stand out as a true alternative, and made it a unique creature, are gone. While it’s true that some of these points were in decline long before January 4 of 2010, under the Hogan/Bischoff regime, they have all but vanished. As food for thought, here are eight reasons why we USED to watch TNA.

Mark tonight on your calendars.  Write it down somewhere and put it somewhere where you won’t lose it.  Today is January 4, 2010, and as a wrestling fan, you’re in for what promises to be the biggest night in Sports Entertainment in nearly nine years.  TNA Wrestling has finally decided to fire the proverbial first shot at World Wrestling Entertainment, a shot that one Vincent Kennedy McMahon will certainly do everything in his power to fight off.

Back in October, the wrestling world was in shock when Eric Bischoff and Hulk Hogan announced a partnership with TNA President Dixie Carter during a press conference at New York’s Madison Square Garden, a building where the McMahon family and World Wrestling Entertainment has long held a monopoly on the wrestling business.  World Championship Wrestling, in it’s entire history, never held an event in the Garden.  Neither had the National Wrestling Alliance.  MSG was strictly McMahon territory.  While TNA hasn’t held an event in the Garden, and likely won’t, just having the press conference in the house that Vince built was huge.  It wasn’t as huge as the announcement that followed on TNAWrestling.com – Hulk Hogan was coming to TNA.

Speculation ran wild – no pun intended – as to when Hogan would make his TNA Debut, but during an Ultimate Fighting Championship broadcast on Spike TV, Hogan announced that on January 4th, 2010, TNA would be airing a three hour live edition of iMPACT head to head with WWE’s flagship show, RAW.  TNA obviously had huge plans for tonight, but that’s not to say that the WWE hasn’t countered.  Rumors originally indicated The Rock would guest host RAW, as he’d arguably been the biggest star in WWE since Hogan’s heyday, but just a few weeks ago the gossip shifted from The Rock to one Bret “Hitman” Hart when RAW Guest Host Dennis Miller indicated that he’d like to see Hart as a future guest host.  Last week, McMahon confirmed Hart’s presence for this evening – his first time on a live WWE program in over a dozen years.

Hogan vs. Hart is a long time dream match for wrestling fans, and though the two have never, and given health concerns, likely will never face each other in the ring, tonight they’ll go head to head in a ratings war.

Hulk Hogan is most certainly a bigger name in the world of Sports Entertainment than Bret Hart, but will fans tune in to see him?  Do enough people even know that TNA iMPACT – let alone Hulk Hogan – will be on tonight to make any sort of ratings difference?

Whether Hogan’s influence on TNA makes any kind of difference on the product remains to be seen.  What changes will be made to the TNA product?  What kind of effect will it have on WWE’s stranglehold on the Sports Entertainment audience?  Can TNA prove themselves tonight to be a legitimate contender to the WWE throne?  I guess we’ll start to find out those answers tonight, as a special 3-hour TNA iMPACT! airs tonight at 8PM EST on Spike TV against WWE RAW at 9PM EST on the USA Network.

Tonight, Mick Foley hunts down Jeff Jarrett, and we’ll hear more about the 3 Hour Monday Night iMPACT on January 4th.  Plus, TNA will probably brag about buying a billboard in New York City with Hulk Hogan’s mug on it.  All this, and presumably, some wrestling, tonight on iMPACT!

Wait a minute – the byline on this article says “ThinkSoJoE.”  Isn’t iMPACT! Drowgoddess territory?  Well kids, yes, iMPACT! is Drowgoddess territory – but she’s been called up to the big leagues.  Starting today, the Empress of iMPACT! will be plying her trade at James Guttman’s World Wrestling Insanity on Thursday nights.  Don’t worry though, she’s not completely leaving Bored Wrestling Fan – she’ll be here every week to review Friday Night SmackDown!  World Wrestling Insanity was the inspiration for BWF, and we’re very proud of Drow.  You’re here though, so why not read on?

After a half-completed review last week, and a total MIA during Sunday’s ppv, let’s see if your Empress of ”iMPACT” can pull off an entire review! Cross the line, peoples!