Tag Archive: Intercontinental Champion

  1. WWE RAW 6/17/13: Payback for Payback.

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    I have hope.  I have hope that after last night, the WWE is ready to turn the corner and start producing compelling television.  CM Punk is back.  Rob Van Dam is coming back.  They pulled off the elusive double turn with Alberto Del Rio and Dolph Ziggler, which I fully expect them to solidify on tonight’s show.  Plus another surprise pops up in the first 30 minutes of this episode, which I’m sure will be exciting for some people.  Let’s roll!

    I watch 30 minutes of RAW, leave for work, avoid spoilers like (and from) the plague, and then watch the entire show when I get here.  That’s how ThinkSoJoE’s RAW reviews work.  Also, I play by my own rules.  Screw you, SmackDown review!

    (more…)

  2. RYTMAN’S RECAP: RAW 04/16/2013

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    So just a basic recap today, rough morning.

    Let’s start with…

    MATCH RESULTS

    ORTON/SHEAMUS DEF. BIG SHOW (HANDICAP MATCH) – A pointless rematch from Friday.  Brogue Kick + RKO = Three count.

    Rytman Remark: You know, neither Orton or Sheamus are THAT much smaller than the big show.  The two of them beating him, is like either of them losing to two normal sized guys.

    KOFI KINGSTON DEF. ANTONIO CESARO (NEW U.S. CHAMPION) – Match wastes no time in going into a spot-fest.  Kingston rolls out of a sun-set flip, rolls Cesaro backwards into a standing position and hits “Trouble In Paradise” for the three-count and the title.

    Rytman Remark: Remember when WWE first ventured out into video games? And how they followed the normal 2-D, side-scrolling fighter format? (I’m thinking Street Fighter, Mortal Combat.) This match was like that, entertaining, but no real story.

    WWE TAG CHAMPIONS TEAM HELL NO (KANE/DANIEL BRYAN) DEF. THE PRIME TIME PLAYERS – The PTP’s are almost completely jobbed out here.  Choke-slam/flying head-butt combo wins this for the champs.

    Rytman Remark: The commentator spent this match making jokes about goats in reference to Bryan’s beard, because there was nothing else really to talk about.

    R-TRUTH DEF. WWE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION WADE BARRETT (NON-TITLE) R-Truth wins it by grabbing Barrett by the head and dropping him face-first to the mat.  (The Little Jimmy?) After the match, Truth looks just as surprised as the rest of us.

    Rytman Remark: There MIGHT be a point to this loss.  WWE has a Battle Royal set up for Main Event this Wednesday, to name a #1 contender to Barrett’s belt.  If R-Truth wins, it’ll cement the seed planted here.

    RHODES SCHOLLARS (Sandow/Cody) DEF. SANTINO MORELLA/GREAT KAHLI (w/Natalya & Hornswoggle)– Santino gets the Cobra on Sandow and chases off Cody.  Horny-dawg (yes, I am going to call him that if I want to,) tries to “cobra” Cody.  Cody gets rough with him.  Khalil comes to the rescue, and Santino gets pinned because he’s not watching Sandow.  School-boy, for the three.

    Rytman Remark: ( face-palm..)

    JACK SWAGGER (w/Zeb Coulter) DEF. WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION DOLPH ZIGGLER (w/AJ Lee & Big E.) – A hard fought match with Ziggler picking up some fan support, but Swagger getting the three-count out of nowhere by dropping Ziggler throat-first into the top rope.

    NIKKI BELLA (W/BRE) DEF. WWE DIVA’S CHAMPION KAITLYN – Nikki’s game-plan is to keep taking Kaitlyn’s legs out from under her.  Kaitlyn hits the stomach-breaker, but Bree switches w/sis to steal a three count.

    Rytman Remark: In order…

    1. So, we’re just dropping that whole thing w/Laya wanting a title shot? After like more than a month of slow build? And Tamina? Just nothing? Cena & Bryan’s girlfriends to the front of the line?
    2. Twin Magic? With two girls that look NOTHING ALIKE ANYMORE?
    3. In fairness, this match did not suck anywhere near as much as it should’ve.

     

    Okay, now we look at…

    STORYLINES/ANGLES

    1.) BROCK/TRIPLE H: LET’S JUST GET IT OVER WITH – 3MB (Heath Slater, Drew McIntyre, Jinder Mahal,) came out first, calling out the Shield, demanding an apology for the beating on Smackdown.  Instead, they got another beating, from BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROCK LESNARRRRRRRR!  It ends w/Slater takes two F-5’s to the barricade.

    Crowd: One more time!  One more time!  One more time!

    Paul Heyman gets control of Lesnar, gets him in the ring, and gets the mike.  He gives Triple H credit for knocking out Lesnar, calling him a “Warrior, worthy of admiration.” Heyman says the score is “one and one,” and it’s “time to get extreme.” He challenges Trips to meet Lesnar in a steel cage match at Extreme Rules and has “two words,” for Trips…

    “Challenge, Issued.” – Paul Heyman

    2.) ZIGGLER/DEL RIO: WHY WASTE TIME BUILDING THE CHAMP? – Dolph Ziggler comes out with the “Dolph-tourage,” (Copyright: Robert Rytman,) to brag about his title win.  Alberto Del Rio comes out with a still hurt Roberto Rodriguez and his left leg taped up.  He gets in the ring and demands his rematch now!  Before the match begins, Jack Swagger and Zeb Coulter come out, claiming Swagger deserves the credit for Dolph’s win and deserves the shot more than Del Rio.  Swagger gets on the apron and ADR gets in a shot to Swagger’s face.  Big E. gets between Del Rio and Ziggler, but Swagger grabs ADR’s leg and works it over in the corner, wrapping it around the ring post and pounding away on it.

    Later in the show, we’re in Vicki Guerro’s office.  She and her assistant, Brad Maddox are discussing things, when Teddy Long comes in.  Apparently he’s taken it on himself to book Ziggler vs. Swagger and he’s given Swagger some “extra incentive,” to compete.  Vicki likes the idea.  Maddox tells Teddy to go tell someone.  Teddy says it’s not his job.  Vicki tells Brad to do it.

    After Swagger’s win, (see above,) Del Rio attacks Swagger and goes after the arm.  Officials break it up and Del Rio stands tall.

    Rytman Remark: Okay, I’m thinking this angle is the one getting rushed.  Having Del Rio demand a rematch while he’s still hurt makes him look more like a fool then a fighter.  Why not do a Ziggler/Swagger program and save Del Rio for next month?

    3.) FAHHHN-DAHHHN-GOING-GOING-GONE! – FANDANGO comes out to be interviewed by Lawler.  When Fandango asks Lawler about moving his hips, Lawler decides to move his hips back to the announcers table.  Fandango tries to get the crowd “Fandangoing,” with mixed results.  A few minutes of this and Fandango tells the crowd to go “Fandango” themselves.

    Rytman Remark: PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS THE END OF “FANDANGOING!”

    4.)  SHEAMUS/HENRY: IRISH CREAMED! (NOT THAT WAY YOU SICKOS!) – Matt Striker is backstage interviewing Sheamus when Henry bull-rushes him down for the second time since last Friday.

    Later in the show, we get an announcement for Smack-Down this Friday.  Team White-snake (Sheamus/Orton) vs. Big Show and Mark Henry.

    Rytman Remark: And we couldn’t do this match tonight because?…

    5.) C.M. PUNK: PUNK OUT? – C.M. Punk came out with Heyman.  Punk talks about how he could never enjoy what he has at the time, because he’s always looking “around the corner” for the next hurdle, how after holding the title for more than 400 days, he went right after the Undertaker’s streak.  In the middle of the promo, the crowd starts a dueling chant for him and the Taker.  Punk goes flat.  His eyes, his posture, it becomes that of a man crushed.  Punk hugs Paul, gives him the mike, and limps off, bypassing the stage and going right for the exit.

    Rytman Remark: I am aware that Punk is taking the time off to heal up.  However, I’m giving him credit for his performance.  He came off like he really did “lose his smile,” and if you wanted to start retirement rumors (or an angle,) you could easily use this promo.  I’m predicting a HUGE comeback for Punk – maybe even a face turn – when WWE realizes how much they miss him.

    6.) BOOKER T/TEDDY LONG: CLASH OF THE TITANS (KINDA) – Backstage, Booker T is NOT happy with Teddy Long going over his head.  He makes the match at Extreme Rules a three-way for the title and tells Teddy to “handle his business.”

    Rytman Remark: I’m glad Teddy’s getting to assert himself, as opposed to being a constantly put-upon errand boy, but do we need ANOTHER POWER STRUGGLE ANGLE!? GOOD GRIEF!

    Side Note: I heard Michael Cole on one of the shows, talking about Booker T letting the HOF honor go to his head, and how that may be contributing to his problems with Teddy.  Guys, Booker is NOT the one coming off as a heel in this.

    7.) CENA/RYBACK: CONTINUITY! (BOOM) PART 2– All night we’re teased with Ryback speaking out tonight about his actions.  Striker has Cena backstage, where he comes out to almost NO reaction.  Cena says he’ll be in the ring with a yellow shirt and his WWE title and he will confront Ryback tonight.

    Ryback has his say in a pre-taped promo.  Ryback starts by comparing his spot with Cena’s after Mania.  Cena was on top, Ryback was on the bottom.  Only one place each for them to go.  Ryback goes over his past few months in WWE.  He credits Cena as a friend and mentor, even mentioning last October when Cena nominated him for a shot at the WWE title.  Ryback then goes over his feud with the Shield and Mark Henry, pointing out how Cena never came to help him out when he was jumped by the Shield, but he almost always had Cena’s back when he was jumped.

    “I am not an afterthought. I am not a sidekick. … If you were Superman, say hello to Kryptonite!” – Ryback

    He says being Cena’s “friend” meant staying in his shadow, and he’s not staying there anymore.

    Our “main event” for the evening is Cena calling out Ryback.

    “This week, I say you make a move, and see if you have what it takes to EARN a championship!” – John Cena

    Ryback backs down and walks away.

    SIERRA,HOTEL/INDIA/ECHO/LIMA/DELTA, BELIVE IN THE SHIELD!

    The Shield come down to the ring and surround Cena.  They hold back, waiting to see what Ryback will do.

    Ryback walks off, and RAW ends with a Shield beat-down on Cena.

    Side Note: We caught a second of the Shield in the “Gorilla” position by accident, which kinda gave it away.

    So, you know someone lost a job.

    Rytman Remark: Best Ryback Promo Ever.  The guy knocked it out of the park, in regards to setting himself up as bitter/jealous.  I commend whoever it was, that figured out how to string Ryback’s past booking together into a cohesive narrative.  If you entertain the notion that this was the game plan all along, it explains why WWE booked him as a choke-artist.  It gives him motive to turn bitter and blame Cena.

    Here’s the problem…

    If you want to call out Cena for not doing a run-in, you’re going to have to call out the ENTIRE WWE for not running in and helping out their “friends.” In the past year, building to Mania, the only person I’ve seen run-in to save someone from a beating was R-Truth helping out Kofi Kingston when he came back.  I’m aware that Orton/Sheamus/and Big Show did run-ins w/each other during their feud w/the Shield, but that was under the premise of a common enemy, not “friendship.”

    Rytman’s Review: Okay, not an earth-shattering RAW by any means, but an effective place-holder-episode. “Auto-pilot” isn’t always a bad idea, if it keeps things moving.  This RAW did it’s job, setting up the next PPV.  And speaking for myself, I appreciate keeping the drama brief.

  3. TOMORROW: BWF IS JERICHO!

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    BWF IS JERICHO

    BWF IS JERICHO!

    ThinkSoJoE from BoredWrestlingFan.com here.  It is my distinct honor to inform all of the great BoredWrestlingFan and Cheap-Heat.com readers that tomorrow morning, my BWF Radio co-host JT, Cassidy from Cheap-Heat, and myself will be conducting an interview with 11-time World Champion, 9 time Intercontinental Champion, and the frontman for the great heavy metal band Fozzy, the one and only Chris Jericho.  To say that we have been greatly looking forward to this opportunity is an understatement.  I’m proud to announce that this interview will be available tomorrow evening at all the usual places BWF Radio can be found!

  4. RYTMAN’S REVIEW: WWE MONDAY NIGHT RAW 11/26/2012

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    MATCH RESULTS

    RYBACK DEF. TITUS O’NEIL – Total domination by Ryback, until Darien Young interfered by grabbing Ryback’s ankle.  O’Neil hit one inverted Power Bomb for a brief one-count. Still, the match ended the same way all Ryback matches end; power-bomb, shell-shock, three-count.

    After the match, Ryback refused to leave the ring until he got his hands on WWE Heavyweight Champion C.M. Punk, Paul Heyman, or the three men who jumped him two days in a row.  A line of security guards come-out, but Ryback tossed the biggest one first, and the rest scattered.

    RAW Supervisor Vicki Guerro came out to order him out of the ring, Ryback told her to shut up (which won him a ton of new fans,) and demanded revenge.  Vicki gave him a match against Punk at TLC.  Ryback demanded that it be made a TLC match (Tables, Ladders, and Chairs.) Vicki agreed, and Ryback left the ring.

    ALBERTO DEL RIO DEF. THE GREAT KAHLI – This match was set up with a pre-recorded backstage segment, where Rosa Mendes demanded an apology from Hornswoggle, for squirting water in her face, with trick flowers last week.  Hornswoggle called her conceited, and Alberto Del Rio stepped in, offering to beat him up.  Kahli stepped in to scare him off.  Kahli actually dominates most of the match, but a distraction by Roberto Rodriguez (Del Rio’s personal ring announcer,) sets up Kahli for an attack from behind.  Del Rio hits the arm-bar for a win by submission.

    TAMINA DEF. ALICIA FOX – Basically, Tamina slaps Alicia around and ends this with a splash of the top, for a three-count.

    INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION KOFI KINGSTON DEF. TENSAI – Wade Barrett, Kofi’s next challenger, Wade Barrett joins the commentary team at ringside.  Tensai’s size advantage gives him an edge for a good amount of time, but Kofi hits a big kick and a flying body press for the three-count.

    After the match, Barrett walked into the ring, gave Kofi the title belt, and then walked off without incident.

    REY MYSTERIO DEF. WWE TAG-TEAM CHAMPION DANIEL BRYAN – One of the best matches on TV this year.  Both men relied on their agility and quick last-second escapes and counters to keep the tide turning back and forth.  Bryan focused on beat-downs and wearing down the arm, Mysterio countered with bursts of fast-paced offense.  Match ends with a 619/Dropping a Dime combo by Mysterio for a pin on Bryan.

    JOHN CENA DEF. DOLPH ZIGGLER – This match was set up after a segment with Vicki Guerro offering Cena and AJ matching bathrobes (see below.) People, who criticize Cena for his “five moves of doom,” need to acknowledge Ziggler does the same thing (if not everybody in WWE,).  That said, this was a good, solid match.  One point of contention is Cena NO-SELLING the “bad knee,” until a specific spot at the end.  Going for the “five knuckle shuffle,” Cena stumbles out of the ring, the ref and another WWE official check to see if he can continue, while Ziggler exposes a turnbuckle.  AJ runs out to stop him and Vicki runs out to pull AJ off the ring.  The ladies have a stare-down while Ziggler goes after Cena with his MiTB briefcase.  Cena ducks Ziggler’s swing and hooks the “AA,” for a three-count.  Cena celebrates with AJ, FORGETTING ALL ABOUT THE BAD KNEE.

    SHEAMUS DEF. U.S. CHAMPION ANTONIO CESARO – This was a straight up brawl between two big workhorses.  Highlight of the match is Cesaro catching Sheamus and hoisting him up, and dropping him hard.  Picture a combo of Lex Luger’s “torture rack” and Ryback’s “Shell-Shock.” Match ends with Sheamus escaping the “neutralizer” with a back-drop and a Brogue-kick to Cesaro.  Cesaro goes out to the floor and gets counted out.

    World Heavyweight Champion Big Show comes out with a chair.  Sheamus grabs the mike and tells Big Show he will be happy to retire him at TLC, and just how barbaric he can be.  Show responds by destroying the chair with his bare hands.

    DAMIEN SANDOW DEF. ZACK RYDER – Not much more than filler.  Ryder had a decent showing here, but the match ends with Sandow using his neck-breaker variant to get the three-count.

    Side Note: Ring announcer Justin Roberts waited for Zack Ryder to get in the ring before announcing him, Michael Cole slipped back into “heel” mode to give him grief about it.

    WWE HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION C.M. PUNK DEF. KANE – Our Main Event for the evening.  And yes, this did take the show over three hours, again.  There is a weird spot in the match when Punk slides to the outside, and starts favoring his right knee.  Kane was as close to Punk as THESEWORDSARETOEACHOTHER but did NOTHING to him.  Kane let Punk slide back in and pull him neck first into the top rope.  Now here’s the weird thing, the announcers (Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler,) never acknowledged ANY of this, even though Punk was right in front of the camera, limping and acting like he was hurt for real the whole time.  It’s weird because this is, to my understanding, standard procedure when someone gets legit hurt during a match, gloss over it, don’t call it, and keep the show going.  So, I have to wonder if Punk really was hurt.  The match ended when the three NXT talents, Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, and Reigns (now called “The Shield”) came out to distract Kane.  Punk hit the GTS and got the three.

    After the match, the Shield teased going for Punk, but pilled on Kane.  Daniel Bryan tried to make the save, but got beat down.  Ryback charged down and took over on the Shield.  Punk took a cheap shot at Ryback, but Ryback caught him.  Ryback went for a power-bomb, but Reigns took him down with a spear.  Monday Night RAW ends with C.M. Punk holding his belt in the air; and his foot on Ryback’s chest; for the second time in a week.

     

    ANGLES AND SEGMENTS

    1.) RYBACK/VICKI – Our first interview segment would have to be Vicki Guerro trying to talk Ryback out of the ring after his match (setting up his match w/Punk at TLC.) Not a shining moment for either one of them.  Huge gaps between the dialogue and you could tell they didn’t talk over each other when they were supposed to.  Seriously, don’t give Ryback more lines than he needs.

    2.) Backstage: Hornswoggle, Rosa, Del Rio, and KHALI – Basic segment just to set up their match, seemed pretty damn elaborate for a match that wasn’t anything special.

    3.) GM’S OFFICE: VICKI, HEYMAN, PUNK – Punk came in to complain about having to face Ryback, Heyman suggested Vicki was trying to compensate for her bias against Cena and AJ, and Vicki flat out accused Punk of calling in the “Shield” to cover his ass.  Vicki sets up a match between Punk and the winner of a RAW-active Twitter Poll, #WWEKane or #WWEBryan (see above.) Interesting to see Punk get the shaft from a “fellow” heel; it gives Vicki an extra character dimension, and it makes you wonder what it is EVERYBODY hates about Punk.

    4.) THE SHEILD SPEAKS – We see a pre-recorded interview with Michael Cole and the three NXT talents who’ve taken it on themselves to attack Ryback twice, (Ambrose, Rollin, and Reigns.) They deny any affiliation with C.M. Punk, and claim they were acting against injustice.  They accused WWE of being an elaborate popularity contest, and stated that C.M. Punk had every right to celebrate his One Year anniversary as champion, arguing they would’ve done the same thing if Ryback or Cena had been champion and Punk tried to disrupt them.  They declared themselves The Shield and cut the interview short.  Interesting aspect; as the Shield’s mission statement seems to have themes in common with the IWC’s constant complaints about WWE.

    5.)  VICKI, CENA, AJ, AND ZIGGLER – Basically, Cena comes out to address the “kiss” from last week.  Vicki comes out to trash AJ and present Cena with a “gift,” of matching bathrobes and to warn Cena about the inevitable implosion.  She points out AJ’s relationship drama with Punk/Bryan and Kane.  AJ comes out to tell off Vicki and blatantly shoves her attraction to Cena in everyone’s face.  Ziggler comes out to remind everyone that he took out Cena last week in the locker room, and Cena jumped him from behind on Smackdown.  Cena tries to go after him, but Vicki orders him to stop and makes a match between Ziggler and Cena later that night.  The match ends with Cena getting the win. CAN WE END THIS NOW!? I am PRAYING that this is the end of the AJ “scandal,” and I will spend the rest of my life wondering WTF this was supposed to accomplish.

    On paper, this was a good RAW, with a lot more actual wrestling and a lot of solid match-ups, however the angle segments really weighted down the show.

  5. RYTMAN’S REVIEW: RAW 11/19/2012

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    Last night’s RAW was for me, a mixed bag.  There were low-points, painful ones at that, but there were one or two points where I could see a glimmer of hope.

    MATCH RESULTS

    RYBACK DEF TENSAI – Ryback in the ring, cuts a decent promo demanding WWE champ C.M. Punk and the three NXT talents who jumped him at Survivor Series come out to face him or he tears the place down.  Vicki Guerro, RAW Supervising Manager, came out to berate Ryback for blowing two title shots and warn him not to cause trouble or he would face a fine/suspension.  She sends out Tensai to see “just how big” his appetite is.  Match ends just how you’d expect it.  Ryback puts Tensai down with the Shell-Shock for a pin.

    WADE BARRETT DEF WWE INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION KOFI KINGSTON – Before the match, we see Wade Barrett cutting a backstage promo from last night’s survivor series, saying how he’s beaten Kofi for the Intercontinental title before and Kofi holding the title was a disgrace to WWE.  Barrett dominates the match with a combo of holds and brawling, as well as focusing on an eye injury to Kofi.  Kofi gets in a big flurry of offense but Barrett rakes his eye on the rope and ends it with the “Bull-Hammer Elbow.”

    KAITLYN DEF AKSANA – Aksana actually tries actual “wrestling” for once.  She starts by faking a walk-out to lure Kaitlyn into a clothesline and working over the left arm.  Sloppy, but it’s an “improvement.” Kaitlyn gorilla-presses her and drops her stomach first into her knee for a three-count.

    U.S. CHAMPION ANTONIO CESARO DEF BRODUS CLAY – Despite R-Truth on commentary and the Funkadactyls at ringside, Cesaro gets the pin with the “Neutralizer.”

    RANDY ORTON DEF ALBERTO DEL RIO (2 FALLS OUT OF 3) – The first fall starts out as a basic “back and forth,” until Orton forces Del Rio outside.  Del Rio pulls Orton, shoulder first into the ring-rope, then into the corner post.  When he refuses to let up the assault on the arm, Orton gets the win by DQ.  The second fall has Orton making the comeback while favoring the left arm, but Del Rio locks in the arm-bar and Orton has to tap out.  Third fall has Del Rio attacking the bad arm, while Orton tries to fight back.  Ricardo Rodriguez (Del Rio’s personal ring announcer,) gets ejected for grabbing Orton’s ankle, and after missing an inziguri, Orton gets the pin with an RKO out of nowhere.

    GREAT KAHLI DEF PRIMO/EPICO w/ROSA MENDES – Hornswoggle comes out to squirt Rosa in the face with water from a trick bouquet of flowers while Kahli destroys Mo/Co.  I put more effort into that sentence than anybody put into that match.

    THE MIZ DEF DAVID OTUNGA – Very basic, by-the-numbers match; Otunga gets to look good here, dominating Miz with clotheslines and chin-locks, but Miz gets in the “Skull-Crushing-Finale,” for the inevitable three-count.

    SHEAMUS DEF DAMIAN SANDOW – Sheamus comes out with chair in hand.  He cuts a promo recapping his feud with World Heavyweight Champion the Big Show and makes note that he is “not smiling anymore.”  Big Show comes out, and they start shouting over each other.  Show calls Sheamus a “barbarian,” and Sandow makes his entrance.  Match builds from a slow pace, starting out with Sandow trying to avoid Sheamus for the first few minutes.  First high-spot is Sheamus tossing Sandow out by the beard.  Sandow actually dominates the match from that point on, beating Sheamus down and trying to wear him out.  Sandow takes too long setting up the “elbow of distain” and Sheamus hooks in a side-back-breaker.  Sheamus hits a flying shoulder block, the “White Noise,” and the Brogue-kick for a three-count.

    WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS HELL NO (DANIEL BRYAN AND KANE) VS SINSTERIO (SIN CARA/REY MYSTERIO: NO CONTEST – The real story here is the absolute TRAIN WRECK of the Prime Time Players (Titus O’Neal/Darren Young) doing commentary with Cole/Lawler.  Eventually they all give up and settle for entertaining each other with jokes and one-liners.  Ironically, the PTP’s come off as funny and charismatic (which is bad because they’re heels.)  Match ends when the PTP’s rush the ring, and get beat down by both other teams.

     MAJOR STORYLINES

    1. THE AJ “SCANDAL” – So this nonsense begins with Vicki bringing out two people to the ring, one a waitress claiming AJ and Cena were getting “friendly” with each other in a restaurant, and the other was a dude implying he had pics of them “doing it” in the back of a car.  AJ came out to confront her, followed by John Cena, who accused Vicki of harassing people just to get attention.  He decided to show her how it’s done and planted a kiss on AJ.  He turned to Vicki but AJ grabbed him and JUMPED HIM LIKE A FACE HUGGER IN ALIENS!  The kiss went well over a minute while Vicki threw a tantrum. (Why?) Ziggler runs out and jumps Cena.  Cena tries to give Ziggler the “Attitude Adjustment,” Ziggler escapes, and Cena goes after him, twisting his left knee in the process.

    We see Cena get his knee taped up backstage.

    AJ goes to Vicki, asking what she plans to do about it.  Vicki, flanked by Tamina Snuka, says nothing.  AJ says she will.

    AJ heads for the locker room with Layla trying to talk her out of it.  AJ blows her off and goes in to confront Ziggler.  Ziggler gives her a verbal dressing down (VERBAL you pervs,) and AJ goes off on him.  Cena pulls her off and Ziggler jumps him.  The two men go crashing into a toilet stall, and Ziggler wails away on Cena until Titus pulls him off.  Ziggler gets in one last shot to Cena’s bad knee.

    Okay….

    1. Why would Vicki and Ziggler be upset about this?  Didn’t Cena and AJ CONFIRM everything they were being accused of?  And let’s say they did…

    2. SO PHKING WHAT!? What does this prove? Two single, consenting adults have decided to date, WHAT HAS VICKI “WON?”

    Here’s the thing, when Vicki started this crap, it made SOME sense.  AJ was RAW GM; Vicki wanted her out and wanted her job.  AJ QUIT trying to protect John.  VICKI GOT THE JOB (sort off.) WHY IS THIS STILL A THING? Vicki has won.  There is no reason, story-line, OR OTHERWISE for Vicki to keep this up.

    Now before you argue “she wants to drive AJ out of WWE,” let me remind you, AJ WAS ON HER WAY OUT WHEN THIS STARTED! VICKI HIRED HER BACK! Vicki could’ve been free of AJ weeks ago.  You could say Vicki is jealous of AJ, and wants to torture her, AND YOU WOULD BE GIVING HER AN ACTUAL MOTIVE! SOMETHING WWE DID NOT DO!

    Side Note: I don’t know if Cena is legit hurt or it’s just an angle, but it looks like in either scenario, he’s out of the title picture.

    2. THE CELEBRATION OF C.M. PUNK – The storyline with the least attention had the best payoff.  We begin with Heyman at the top of the show holding up a poster of Punk and planning a big celebration for the champ.  Punk comes out to hear his praises.  Matt Stryker tries to get an interview and Punk threatens him.  Heyman tries to smooth things over saying tonight is a celebration and everyone is invited, including Ryback.

    We get short backstage segments featuring Heyman abusing crew members while planning the party, including one where Heyman demands “BALLOONS” manically, and one where he assures Punk nothing will ruin their celebration.

    The final segment of the evening has Heyman in the ring.  He calls the audience on the hypocrisy of chanting “ECW” when they see him, and booing him for his joke at Lawler’s expense last week.  They say they want the Attitude era back, but get all upset when they get a taste of it.  Punk comes out and points out to us that he did something Brett Hart, Shawn Michaels, Triple H, The Undertaker, and The Rock couldn’t do, hold the WWE title for one calendar year. We get a video package of Punk’s year-long reign, followed by Heyman and Punk running down all the great stars that couldn’t beat Punk and congratulating each other.

    Ryback comes out, but gets jumped by NXT talents Seth Rollins, Dean Ambrose, and Roman Reins.  Ryback tries to fight them off, but they end up putting him through an announce table, just like at Survivor Series.  RAW ends with the champ, cautiously, standing with one foot on Ryback and his title in the air.

    Okay, LOVING IT! This is the first RAW this year that ends with Punk standing tall over a fallen enemy.  I’m hoping this leads to a Punk-led stable of young talent rallying to their hero’s side and becoming a major force in WWE. (Of course, WWE will most likely push this as a bunch of punks trying to get attention and Punk will get written into a feud with Hornswoggle.) Nonetheless, this is the first time in months that WWE has tried to make Punk look “relatively” good on television.  It is a welcome change.

    Overall, if this RAW had dropped the AJ scandal B.S. it would’ve been the strongest RAW in a long time.  We got a LOT of actual wrestling where most people looked strong even in defeat.

    So, while I’m not in LOVE with the product right now, this has been a step in the right direction.

  6. RYTMAN’S REVIEW: RAW 11/12/2012

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    Question; WHEN DID TNA IMPACT START BOOKING WWE SHOWS? Let’s break it down, angles we don’t care about getting stretched WAY past the point we care, angles we might care about getting cut short, face/heel turns out of nowhere, any of this sounding familiar? We’re gonna look at last night’s RAW to find out.

    The show opened with a special Veteran’s Day tribute to our military from John Cena, as a voice over; followed by a recap of last week with a dramatic voice over similar to “TMZ” or a promo for a soap opera.  The voice over recapped the current major storylines including Lawler returning after a heart attack, Vicki’s crusade to embarrass AJ/Cena, C.M. Punk holding the WWE title for 358 days and facing Cena tonight, and Brad Maddox screwing Ryback and facing him tonight for a $1,000,000 contract.

    Yes, WWE is using a dramatic voice over guy just like TNA Impact, just like TMZ, and every sleazy tabloid show.  Why? I don’t know.  I probably won’t in this life time.

    RANDY ORTON DEF DOLPH ZIGGLER – Fast-paced back and forth match-up with a lot of high-impact spots in a short span of time.  Match ends when Alberto Del Rio tries to distract Orton with a run in, and Orton side steps Ziggler’s fame-asser, getting the pin with a roll up.

    ADR and Ziggler (w/Ricardo Rodriguez) gave Orton a beat down until WWE Intercontinental champion made the save.  Teddy Long, Senior Advisor to Smackdown GM Booker T, came out and made this a tag team match (per usual.)

    DEL RIO/ZIGGLER DEF ORTON/KINGSTON – Interesting moment when Kingston had a pin on Del Rio.  It seemed to me the ref had to stop short on his count because Ziggler was out of position and late w/the save.  Ziggler-Rio get the win after Rodriguez distracts Kingston and Del Rio hits an inziguri to the back of the head for a pin.

    Any reason they just couldn’t book a tag team match in the first place?  Why waste the time?

    (I’m guessing because SOMEBODY wasn’t willing to job out; coughing noises, RANDY ORTON, coughing noises.)

    We were reminded of Jerry Lawler’s return later tonight, and shown Vicki Guerro making her way to the ring from backstage.

    We returned from break with Dolph and Vicki in the ring, discussing the definition of “Scandal,” and Dolph staying out to find the truth.  We recapped Vicki’s video “evidence” with Dolph riffing on Cena and AJ.  Vicki ordered AJ to come out to explain herself and kept demanding AJ admit that she’s having an affair as the crowd vehemently chanted “Shut up Vicki!” AJ admitted only to being “friends” with John and made a joke about Vicki throwing her “considerable” weight around.  Vicki responded by playing voice mails from AJ’s phone, each one sounding like an intimate talk with Cena.  AJ insisted they were faked and Ziggler asked if those nights in Cena’s hotel room were more disappointing than not speaking to him anymore.  Cena came out but was stopped short by AJ, who slapped Ziggler right in the face followed by a big right hand by Cena.  Ziggler and Vicki run off as we were reminded that Cena will face Punk in the main event tonight.

    1.) WHY IS THIS STILL A THING!? Vicki HAS what she wanted, power over RAW, not that she’s using it for anything.  And what good is attacking Cena doing her or Ziggler? You could say it’s strictly for attention, AND YOU’D BE GIVING US MORE MOTIVE THAT THE PEOPLE WRITING THIS DAMN SHOW DID!

    2.) WHY IS THIS A “SCANDAL!?” Cena is divorced; AJ is not GM of RAW anymore, TRIPLE H MARRIED HIS BOSSES DAUGHTER WHILE HE WAS STILL AN ACTIVE WRESTLER! If they are having a “thing,” WHERE IS THE CONFLICT? WHAT IS THE BASIS OF VICKI’S COMPLAINT!? Vicki has nothing to gain here.  She’s being an abusive authority figure for the sake of being an abusive authority figure.  It’s annoying, tired, and played out.

    3.) WHAT DOES ZIGGLER HAVE TO DO WITH ANY OF THIS? I don’t understand why Ziggler is helping Vicki take jabs at AJ and Cena, since Cena isn’t facing Ziggler at Survivor Series.

    We get another look at World heavyweight Champion Big Show jumping Sheamus and Stephen Regal in a pub on last week’s Smackdown before going to an ad for IAVA.com, an organization dedicated to Iraqi/Afghanistan war veterans.

    We came back to AJ and Cena backstage talking about Vicki and Dolph persecuting AJ over something that never happened, or could happen.  AJ asked “never could happen?” A suddenly tongue tied Cena left the scene with AJ smiling at him. (Author’s note to Cena: RUN! FOR GOD’S SAKE RUN!)

    WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION BIG SHOW DEF WILLIAM REGAL – Sadly, little more than a squash as it was mostly Regal selling Show’s offense and getting in brief moments of resistance.  After the match, Show threatened to KO Regal with the big right hand, however Sheamus made the save, getting Show down and putting the boots to him.  Show runs off as Sheamus looks after Regal.

    KAITLIN DEF LAYLA – We went right into this match from the break.  The match barley went five minutes until Kaitlin caught Layla in her arms.  After what I thought was a botched slam (I was wrong,) Kaitlyn hits a reverse DDT for the three-count.  Divas Champ Eve Torres, guest commentator at ringside, stands up and we get a stare-down.  After that, we get another look at Lawler having a heart attack and an announcement of his big return next.

    We came back to Michael Cole and Jim Ross in the ring, introducing Jerry Lawler.  Lawler made his way into the ring and gave both Cole and JR a hug.  Lawler thanked the crowd for their support and compared his situation to the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life,” in that a near-death experience let him see how much he was loved.  At that moment, WWE heavyweight champion C.M. Punk came out with Heyman.  Punk mentioned how glad he was that Lawler left the ring before Punk beat him to death “again.” He accused Lawler of “disrespectful,” “bad taste”, by way of trying to go toe-to-toe with the champion at 62 years old.  He said shame on you to the crowd for blaming him for Lawler’s attack, and that it’s nobody’s fault but Lawler’s.  He reminded us all that he’s been champion 358 days and is now 9th longest reigning champion of all time.  Lawler jokes about Punk’s reign being on “life support,” and Heyman responded by faking a heart attack.  After Punk “saved” Heyman, Mick Foley came out to call Punk on the carpet.  Punk claimed that since he got pulled out of the Survivor Series tag match, he and Foley had no business with each other, and Foley should concentrate on filling the “gaping hole” in his team.  Foley responded by saying the WWE universe would decide who would get that spot late tonight.  Punk suggested to Foley changing the team name to “Team Worthless,” in reference to him, his team, and the fans.  Foley cut him off sharply, and let Punk in on a little secret about Lawler, “HE WAS DEAD!” He went on to say Punk didn’t care about lessons or respect.  Punk referred to Foley as a “goof” who jumped off his roof. Foley informed Punk he would be the “special guest enforcer” in his match w/John Cena.  Foley leaves with a “Have a Nice Day,” for Punk.  We were shown a graphic confirming we would in fact have the option via Raw-active Twitter poll, and we went to break with a look at Brad Maddox.

    We came back to Punk yelling at Heyman to “Fix it,” referring to Punk’s problems with Cena, Foley, Ryback, and the Maddox issue.  After that, we go to ringside for the respective entrances of Sin Cara and Mysterio.  Lawler was back at ringside.  Justin Gabriel, Tyson Kidd, Primo, Epico, and the Prime Time Players (Titus O’Neal/Darren Young,) were in the ring.

    8 MAN TAG: MYSTERIO, SIN CARA, GABRIEL/KIDD DEF. THE PRIME TIME PLAYERS/PRIMO & EPICO W/ROSA MENDEZ – Good solid trading of back and forth tag team offense to start off.  Ricardo Rodriguez came out to give Rosa a note, upsetting Primo before we went to break.  If I remember correctly, they hinted at a Del Rio/Rosa paring a few years ago, when Del Rio first came in.  It’s nice to see them finally resolving that loose end.

    Match ends with Mysterio hitting the 619, and Gabriel hitting the 450 on Young for the pin.  The match is followed by an ad for the National Guard, and a camera shot of Ohio National guard members in the audience, along with a “Thank You,” from WWE.

    Backstage: Brad Maddox prepped for his match when Heyman approached him.  We went to break as they walked off.

    We came back to a promo for “Fandango” and a backstage segment with Ziggler and Miz giving each other a hard time.  Foley steps in and Ziggler walks off.  Foley gives Ziggler a “hi,” from Amy Schumer.  Miz asks Foley for a spot on the RAW-active ballot and Foley agrees.  Our choices to vote for via Twitter were #Santino, #Ryder, #Miz.

    Now is it me, or should this have gotten WAY more build up?  Wouldn’t it have made sense for Ziggler to have been needling Miz about his losses over the last few weeks, building up to Miz wanting to settle things with him and seeing this as his opportunity?  And why didn’t Foley come to Miz with the offer? Wouldn’t that have gotten Miz some credit?

    R-TRUTH DEF. TENSAI – U.S. Champion Antonio Cesaro came out to call everyone fat and rude before joining the announce team.  During the match, Cole and Lawler made a big deal of Cesaro carrying a satchel.  Cesaro explained it was there to carry whatever he needed.  R-truth dominated the match with high-spot offense and got the pin w/a “Little Jimmy.” Truth and Cesaro traded jabs at ringside, including a joke by Truth about Cesaro being “Europe in my face.”

    After that, we get a look at the new WWE 13, video game, featuring Ryback destroying a player created Brad Maddox.

    After a break we get a recap of the Brad Maddox situation leading up to tonight’s “Million Dollar Challenge,” as well as a recap of Vicki and Dolph tormenting Cena and AJ, AND a recap of Foley, Ziggler, Miz.

    RYBACK DEF BRAD MADDOX – As Maddox came out, we saw an ambulance pull up to the side of the stage and Brad get visibly rattled.  Brad walked to the ring as we were treated to a PIP promo of Brad claiming no one will forget his name.  Ryback came out next, followed by a stretcher.  The entire match is Ryback decimating Maddox, with Maddox getting ZERO offense.  The match ends with Ryback getting the Shell-shock and the pin.  After the match, medics try to take Maddox out on the stretcher but Ryback attacks, dumping Maddox off the stretcher and tossing him like garbage into the ambulance.

    So, that whole thing with Heyman meant NOTHING!? That whole “million dollar challenge thing” goes NOWHERE? WHAT WAS THE POINT!?

    Here’s another thing, let’s play this out on paper.  A desperate young man, who’s had setback after setback, finally has a chance at his dream job and a million dollar contract, if he can beat an unstoppable monster.  As he makes his way to the arena, the monster’s boss sends out an ambulance and a stretcher to intimidate him.  Now if this were anywhere else in the world beside WWE RAW, who would YOU think was the “good guy?” And I know what Maddox did at HitC, what I’m saying is this makes Ryback look more like a heel than it does Maddox.  And since Maddox lost, it comes off anti-climatic.  The resolution falls flat.

    SHEAMUS DEF. DAVID OTUNGA – We get a recap of Sheamus going after Big Show earlier tonight.  While Sheamus destroys Otunga, Regal watches on the monitor in the back.  Sheamus gets the pin with a combo of “White Noise,” and the “Brogue Kick.”

    Backstage: Big Show attacks Regal.

    We came back from break.  Josh Mathews updates us on Regal’s condition.  It’s a concussion and maybe a broken jaw.  We go to a promo for the Wounded Warrior Project, an outfit designed to help returning soldiers with medical and psychological injuries.

    Backstage: Kane makes his way to the ring when Daniel Bryan confronts him.  They argue about Kane tagging with someone besides him with Bryan playing the role of jealous girlfriend.  Bryan suggests going to Foley to protest but Kane just disappears on him.  Bryan goes into his “NO!” routine much to the crowd’s delight.

    WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPION KANE AND THE MIZ DEF. TEAM RHODES SCHOLARS (CODY RHODES/DAMIAN SANDOW) – Miz wins the RAW-active twitter poll to be Kane’s partner, and the crowd seems happy about it.  Daniel Bryan comes out, seemingly to cheer on Kane.  During the match, Bryan managed to distract Miz, setting up an opening for the Rhodes Scholars to take over.  The match ends with Bryan going after Miz but Miz sending him crashing into Rhodes.  Kane gets the pin with the choke-slam, and Bryan and Miz argue over Kane.

    I just wrote that.

    Yeah.

    Daniel Bryan is now Kane’s jealous girlfriend.  I’m just moving on….

    We take a look at WWE’s annual tribute to the troops, and our main event is up next.

    JOHN CENA DEF. WWE CHAMPION C.M. PUNK – Foleys out first as “special enforcer,” followed by Punk w/Heyman, and John Cena.  The crowd is actually split between a man who’s granted a record 300 Make-a-Wish foundation visits and a man who mocked someone for having a heart attack.

    We came back from a break to find Punk in control of the match.  Point of interest is Punk applying a “new/improved” version of the “Anaconda Vice,” down on the mat, hands locked behind Cena’s head w/the left leg hooked under the chin.  Cena eventually escapes and takes over.  Heyman runs in but is caught off by Cena, and Foley drags Heyman out.  Punk tries to limp away from the match but Ryback is out and chases him back into Cena’s clutches.  Cena gets the pin w/the AA.  The match ends with Cena and Ryback staring each other down, both clutching the belt, with Punk on the outside, looking like he’s gonna cry.

    You know, this DOES work in terms of story.  We have two of the most powerful forces in the WWE on a collision course, with the defending champion either caught in the middle, or getting shut out altogether.  The problem is I don’ see it as a story; I see it as THE PERFECT EXAMPLE OF HOW WWE DOES THIS.  I often tell myself that WWE is trying to book Punk like Ric Flair, the clever heel champ who always finds a way to weasel out of losing the title, but then I remember Flair was never treated like a prison bitch.

    In conclusion, this show didn’t really do anything to sell me on Survivor Series this Sunday.  All they did was rush through angles they failed to build up properly over the past month.  Do you know what my advice to WWE is?

    Fire Russo, or whoever’s playing him.

  7. RYTMANS RAW REVIEW 10/22/12

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    SIN CARA/REY MYSTERIO VS RHODES SCHOLARS – Right off the bat, we get into the action. As Rey makes his way out, we’re told by Michael Cole that RAW GM AJ Lee has been called to an emergency meeting at WWE HQ. Sandow and Rhodes win when Sandow blocks the ref from a three count. Sandow and Cara spill outside while Cody hits the crossroads for the three.
    It could just be me, but Cara looked like he was having an off night. The double teams from the masked men seemed awkward, and not as quick or crisp as you’d expect.
    After the match, Team Hell No (Kane and Bryan) cut a promo on their new no. 1 contenders and Kane pulled Bryan behind him, grabbing him by the face, followed up by a pyro spot

    We come back from break with a “Tout” by Zack Ryder about working the first ever WWE Egyptian tour. We get a look at pics and videos.

    INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION KOFI KINGSTON VS MICHAEL MIGILLICUTTY – The Miz joins the commentary team to scout Kofi; however Cole and J.R. put the focus on his match later tonight with Ryback, and the Egyptian tour. Kofi wins it with “Trouble in Paradise.”

    We go to a recap of last Monday’s contract signing when Cena gave Ryback the title-shot at Hell in the Cell, and Ryback gave Punk the “shell-shock.”

    Back from break and we get a shot of Super Bowl Champions the New York Giants before Cena comes out to “really NOT pro-Cena,” crowd. Cole reminds us to go to WWE.com and help the Susan G. Komen foundation fight breast cancer by buying special John Cena merchandise. (100 % goes to the charity.) He cuts a promo about Ryback and Punk at HitC, putting over Ryback as a no-nonsense ass-kicker, promising a Ryback win.
    C.M. Punk comes out w/Paul Heyman. Punk calls Cena on his predictable pandering to the Giants, saying he prefers the San Francisco brand. Punk says he’s the best in the world and promises he will win at HitC. He compliments Cena on his new role as “cheerleader” for Ryback and credits Cena for realizing he can’t beat him. Cena responds by saying he’s clear to wrestle and challenges Punk to step up/in the ring. Punk walks all the way to the edge of the apron, Heyman begging him not to do it every step, and backs out with the belt.

    We go to break with another mention of AJ Lee tweeting about her emergency meeting with WWE HQ.

    U.S. CHAMPION ANTONIO CESARO VS JUSTIN GABRIEL – Cole mentions how Cesaro said no American can beat him, and how last week he disrespected the Sun Records building, Elvis, and Jerry Lee Lewis. End of the match is Gabriel and Cesaro on the top rope, trading hits until Cesaro falls, and Gabriel hits the 450 splash FOR THE WIN! Cole and J.R. sell this as a huge upset and suggest Gabriel might be getting a shot at the U.S. title.

    Backstage; a limo rolls in and Vince McMahon himself gets out w/RAW GM A.J. Lee in tow. (It looks like a kidnapping.)
    Back from break, Vince has AJ in the ring. Vince tells us about AJ being called in by the Board of Directors, and gives the mike to AJ.  AJ officially resigns as GM based on false allegations of “fraternizing” with a WWE superstar. AJ gives an awesome speech about how grateful she is to the WWE for giving a poor girl who grew up with nothing a chance, and how she went from having nothing to being the boss. Vince gives her a hug.
    Out comes Paul Heyman, ragging on AJ for being a “Jersey Girl,” and complimenting her back-handedly for overcoming he faults. He nominates himself as new GM and gets shot down by Vince. We are introduced to new WWE “managing supervisor,” Vicki Guerro.

    What the hell is a “managing supervisor?”

    After Vicki thanks the WWE for the opportunity, Heyman tries to work his charm on her, and tries to get Punk out of his match with Ryback. Vicki shoots him down and makes tonight’s Main Event a champion vs. champion, lumberjack match with Sheamus against C.M. Punk. Heyman walks off having a conniption while Vicki cuts a promo on AJ, calling her too “immature,” for a position of authority. Vicki tells the crowd she was accused of having an “affair” with a WWE superstar. Vicki tries to dismiss her, but after a few steps, AJ decides to go after her. After a quick cat-fight, Vicki bails, and we go to break.

    So for the record, dating WWE talent is a no-no.
    Marriage, that’s a whole different thing.

    Back from break; with Ryback in the ring, followed by The Miz.

    RYBACK VS THE MIZ – Do you expect me to end this in ANY OTHER WAY than clothesline, followed by Shellshock, Ryback gets the pin?

    After the match, we get a promo of the WWE talking to kids about bullying as part of the “Be a Star” campaign AND I’M THE ONLY ONE WHOS GOING TO POINT OUT THE IRONY OF EVE TORRESS DOING THIS AIN’T I?

    We come back from break with Eve backstage dogging AJ on her phone, implying AJ hooked up with Zack Ryder and Primo. Kaitlyn confronts her with a picture taken off her I-pad, and it breaks down into a brawl with Layla getting into it.

    If I knew how, I’d post video of Peter Griffin going “WHO THE HELL CARES?” on constant loop.

    After that, we go to a interview backstage with Josh Mathews and Sheamus, playing with a WWE brawling buddy. Big Show comes in, knocks it away, and warns Sheamus to get serious.

    Daniel Bryan comes out to the ring as we go to break.

    When we come back, we get a pop for WWE.com and a story about Cena getting a special award from the “Make a Wish,” foundation.

    DOLPH ZIGGLER VS WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPION(S) DANIEL BRYAN – J.R. and Cole speculate about Vicki dropping Dolph and the future of RAW management while Ziggler and Bryan wrestle one of the best matches I’ve seen this year. There’s a LOT of high-spots and big-impact maneuvers, and a scary spot with Ziggler hitting the ring-post head first. Match ends with Kane (Bryan’s partner) distracting Bryan with a “YES!” chant and Ziggler hitting the Zig-Zag.

    Side Note: CAN WE PLEASE JUST GET TO THE PART WHERE THEY LOSE THE TITLES AND FUED FOR A MONTH ALREADY?

    After the match, Team Hell No argues until Matt Stryker comes out to announce that Kane and Bryan have been ordered by Vicki Guerro to compete in a “therapeutic game show,” against Rhodes Scholars.

    They ain’t thrilled about it either.

    After the break, we get a recap of AJ resigning, Vicki being made “managing supervisor,” and AJ going off on her ass.

    Bryan and Kane are seated for “the Newly Tag” game, and act like they plan to play along. Damien Sandow and Cody Rhodes come out, crap all over the segment, and walk. Stryker declares them the winners by forfeit as Bryan has a win-gasim. Bryan and Kane look at Stryker with murderous intent. Stryker bails and from the safety of the stage, smiles villainously and makes it clear he can’t wish them luck in their match on Sunday. Big Show walks up behind him and tosses him across the stage like a bowling ball.

    So anybody gonna explain to me what Stryker did to deserve this bitch-booking? Or whatever happened to that whole “no touching announcers,” rule?

    Back from break, Kane and Big Show have a match in progress.

    BIG SHOW VS WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPION(S) KANE – Slow back and forth brawl; with lots of punching and choking with a few high spots. Show wins with the big right hand after Rhodes Scholars comes out with the distraction and double team Bryan into unconsciousness.

    Backstage; Santino tries to comfort AJ. Cena enters the picture and Santino walks. Cena tries to get AJ fight this, AJ reveals Cena was the one they accused her of “fraternizing” with, and she took the hit to protect him. Cena hugs AJ and promises to take care of this.

    Back from break, Miz is Touting about Cairo Egypt, being awesome as part of the world tour.

    Backstage: Cena confronts Vince about the decision to replace AJ with Vick – sort of. Apparently Vince has no say in how his own company is run.

    ALBERTO DEL RIO VS ZACK RYDER – Okay, what is J.R.’s problem tonight? First he and Cole gripe about Roberto Rodriguez introducing Del Rio, then he says something about hearing people complaining about losing their “spot” for years, then he dumps on Ryder’s “internet champion” gimmick. Del Rio wins with the Arm-breaker, and then cuts a promo on Ryder as if he were Randy Orton while continuing to brutalize him. Del Rio mocks Orton’s posing.

    Backstage; Vicki Guerro is cleaning out AJ’s office when Cena gets all up in her face, Vicki points out Cena asked her out on TV, and they were seen having dinner together. He claims it was a business dinner as friends. Vicki says it doesn’t matter; Cena is still the one who cost her, her job.

    Back from break, we have an interview with Dolph Ziggler. He blames John Cena for the whole mess, and implies AJ should’ve had “better taste.”

    We get a Ryback Video Package showing him destroy people and how much the crowd loves him.

    Someone WILL have to explain this to me.

    Backstage; Heyman tries to comfort C.M. Punk who’s upset about the lumberjack match with Sheamus. Heyman tries to keep his spirits up; reassuring him he will be Champion after this Sunday.

    Back from break; we have a TON of WWE superstars around the ring and C.M. Punk in the ring. Sheamus is out next, and you can hear a faint C.M. Punk chant.

    WWE CHAMPION C.M. PUNK VS WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION SHEAMUS – As Sheamus makes his way to the ring, Cole quotes a tweet from “Stone Cold” Steve Austin, wishing him luck. Early in the match, Sheamus is tossed out and the lumberjacks give him a huge berth. When Punk is tossed out a minute later, the “jacks” swarm him. We get a solid, if basic match that builds its pace slowly but gets the crowd into it. Two of the lumberjacks run into the ring and each eats a big boot from Sheamus. Sheamus goes for Punk but takes a chokeslam from Big Show allowing Punk to get the pin.

    And no; I don’t know why Punk wasn’t DQ’d when the two guys ran in.

    After the match, Ryback comes out to get a piece of Punk. Whenever Punk tries to run, the face lumberjacks toss him back to Ryback. Ryback tosses punk like a pizza and drops him on a bunch of heels. Punk whimpers in pain as Ryback stands tall.

     

  8. RYTMANS RAW REVIEW 09/10/12

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    This is going to be brief. Aside from the Lawler incident (see below,) I’ve got family medical drama going on right now, so I hope you understand.

    MATCH RESULTS

    R-TRUTH/KOFI KINGSTON (WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS) DEF THE MIZ(INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION)/ANTONIO CESARO (U.S. CHAMPION) W/AKSANA

    EVE, LAYLA & KAITLIN DEF BETH PHEONIX, NATTIE NEIDHART, & ALICIA FOX

    RANDY ORTON DEF C.M. PUNK (WWE CHAMPION)

    RANDY ORTON/JERRY LAWLER DEF C.M. PUNK (WWE CHAMPION)/DOLPH ZIGGLER

    RYBACK DEF HEATH SLATER

    KANE/DANIEL BRYAN DEF PRIME TIME PLAYERS – KANE/BRYAN NEW #1 CONTENDERS TO THE TAG TEAM TITLE

    ALBERTO DEL RIO DEF TYSON KIDD BY SUBMISSION

    SHEAMUS DEF DAVID OTUNGA

    CODY RHODES DEF REY MYSTERIO

    In the ring promo – John Cena cuts his best promo ever on C.M. Punk.

    RAW ends with Michael Cole cheering on Jerry Lawler to recover

    Here’s the big issue tonight, Jerry Lawler collapses at ringside during the Kane/Bryan-PTP match. At the time of this writing, according to PWInsider/World Wrestling Insanity.com, Lawler is supposedly in stable condition, breathing on his own, and awaiting a cat-scan. No one knows anything else at this time.
    This is taking on scary connotations for fans as this happened in Montreal, during a guest appearance by Brett Hart, drawing comparisons to the Owen Hart tragedy of 1997(?)

    All we can do is hope for the best.

  9. Power Poll 4/21/12

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    Yes folks, the Power Poll has returned to BoredWrestlingFan.com for the sheer fact that I actually bother checking my BWF e-mail accounts on a regular basis.  Who took the top spot?  Who’s off the list?  I DON’T KNOW!  Let’s find out together, shall we?

    (more…)