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Impact opens up with highlights from last week and after the intro we’re going to go straight into the first match this week.

8-Card Stud Tournament Qualifying Match
Brutus Magnus vs. Mr. Anderson

Anderson reminds the fans that the ring is four sided, not 6 sided to get some heat as he does his intro. Footage of Anderson’s big win over Jarrett last week is shown as Anderson makes his way to the ring. Anderson and Brutus lockup and Anderson nails him with a knee to the gut and then lays in a couple of right hands on Brutus. Brutus blocks one of the rights and hits a series of rights of his own. Brutus beats on Anderson in the corner until the referee pulls him off which allows Anderson to hit a dropkick to Brutus’ knee. Anderson stomps on the leg and even the hand of Brutus before hitting an Elbow Drop on the back of Brutus. Anderson whips Brutus hard into the corner and then throws him headfirst into the top turnbuckle before putting the boots to Brutus in the corner. Anderson tries to throw Brutus into the top turnbuckle again but he blocks it and connects with a right hand, but Anderson comes right back with a right of his own and a kick to the gut. Anderson whips Brutus into the ropes and goes for a backdrop but Magnus kicks him in the head and follows it up with a Big Boot. Brutus whips Anderson into the ropes and hits a Back Elbow and then hits a Straightjacket Slam for a nearfall. Brutus goes for the Tormentum but Anderson rakes the eyes of Brutus (the referee was behind Brutus so his vision was blocked) and connects with the Mic Check for the pin!

Winner: Anderson via pinfall (Mic Check)

In the parking lot Mick Foley arrives in his beat up ride.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

In the back Christy Hemme is with Angle. She asks him about his Qualifying Match with Tomko tonight, but he says he’s not worried about Tomko right now. He wants to talk about Hulk Hogan, he claims that Hogan is responsible for Syxx and Hall jumping him last week. Hogan says that’s who Hogan is and now he’s showing his true colors, but it ends tonight. He says Hogan should expect a visit from him tonight and he’ll have a really bad attitude.

At ringside Tenay and Taz hype up the card for tonight which will feature Tara defend the Knockouts Title against Angelina Love, Hernandez & Morgan defend the Tag Titles against 3D, and TNA World Heavyweight Champion AJ Styles going one-on-one with The Pope in a Non Title Match.

Eric Bischoff’s music hits and Mr. Bischoff makes his way out to the ring alone this week. Bischoff says it is so good to be in Orlando one more time. He says last week Hogan make it clear that Foley has to get on the same page with him but Foley made it clear that he just wasn’t willing to do that, but Foley’s music cuts him off before he can say anything more. Foley walks out to the ring with a serious look on his face. Foley says his reputation in wrestling is that there is something wrong in his head and it’s not because he’s willing to do things to his body that doesn’t seem right, but it’s because he likes just about everybody. He throws out names like Buff Bagwell, Paul Heyman, The Ultimate Warrior, etc. of guys that don’t have great reputations in wrestling yet he still likes. He says that Bischoff is the exception because he hates Bischoff’s guts! He calls Bischoff a ‘slick, little hustler’ and that he is the complete opposite of Foley. He says he loves wrestling and gave everything and would’ve given anything to get into this business while Bischoff came in as salesman and an announcer. Foley calls him the worst announcer in history but Taz says Foley must’ve never heard of Mike Adamle (okay, I about split my sides laughing from that one). Foley says that Bischoff weaseled his way into power in WCW and he says he can’t stand Bischoff. Bischoff says that may be true but this isn’t about him and Foley, it’s about whether Foley is willing to get in line in TNA. Foley says it’s about everyone and he says he loves being apart of TNA, but he always prepares himself for the worst case scenario which is why at 28 he was saving every penny he ever made. He says that’s why he was sleeping at the Red Roof Inn when he was WWF Champion and why he drives a ‘piece of crap minivan’ now. He says he did all that so he wouldn’t have to answer to idiots like Bischoff. He shows the camera two names that he wrote down on his hand (Jeremy Borash and Abyss) and says ‘how dare’ Bischoff mess with these guys lives. Foley puts over everything that Borash does for TNA behind the scenes and says that Bischoff not knowing shows how much little he cares about knowing what makes TNA tick. Bischoff what makes him tick is power and control. He then says since Foley won’t get on the same page with him and he’s going to have to turn that page and write the next chapter of the Mick Foley story. Foley mentions something he said in his book about Bischoff saying that power should be limited to those that are not in love with it. He says Bischoff has not learned a single thing since his failure in WCW. Foley says he was recognizable all around the world while Bischoff made reality shows with Chachi. Foley says with all due respect to his wife that he always told her that deep down wrestling was always his first true love in his life because that it was the first thing he ever loved that loved him back. He says he realized that that love might not last forever but he’ll be damned if he sits back and lets Bischoff have his way with the ‘woman’ he loves. Foley starts to leave the ring but Bischoff stops him and says Foley may want to look at those names on his hand because he still has their futures in the palm of his hands. Bischoff says that new chapter of the Mick Foley Story that he was just talking about starts tonight when Mick Foley faces Kevin Nash in a No DQ Match! He says he is a student of history and Mick has a history with Nash and he wants to see that history resolved.

In the back Abyss is watching a monitor when JB walks up and he asks JB if he’s going to be okay. JB asks him if it sounds like he’s going to be okay. JB says he worked for Bischoff 10 years ago and nothing has changed. He says when Bischoff is around nobodies okay. JB says he is just there to pick him last check and Abyss freaks out as JB walks off.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Back from commercials Christy Hemme is with Tara in the back. Christy asks Tara about her history with Angelina. Tara says when she first came to TNA Angelina and the Beautiful People made her life hell but since Angelina has came back she seems to be a different person. Tara says Angelina has her eye on the prize but she can’t take it from her and says she’s ready for Angelina.

TNA World Tag Team Championships
“Super Mex” Hernandez & “The Blueprint” Matt Morgan (c) vs. Team 3D

Tenay mentions that if 3D wins then that would make them 24-time Tag Champions. Bubba and Hernandez will start the match off. They lockup and Bubba throws Hernandez into the corner and then they lockup again but this time Hernandez shoves Bubba into the ropes. Hernandez goes for a clothesline but Bubba blocks it and goes for one of his own, but Hernandez blocks his as well. Bubba grabs a side headlock on Hernandez and he shoves Bubba into the ropes and connects with a nasty shoulder block that sends Bubba crashing into the corner! Hernandez follows up with a Corner Splash attempt but Bubba moves and then whips Hernandez into the opposite corner. Bubba charges and hits a Corner Splash of his own. Hernandez kicks Bubba and grabs the top rope and pulls himself up to the top rope showing off that crazy strength and athleticism he possesses. Bubba connects with some nasty chops on Hernandez and then Press Slams him off the top! Bubba drops an elbow on top of Hernandez and gets a nearfall. Bubba tags in Devon and he lays in some elbows on Hernandez until Hernandez connects with a knee to the gut and quickly tags in Morgan. Morgan goes for a clothesline but Devon ducks and connects with a series of rights. Devon attempts to whip Morgan into the ropes but he reverses it only to eat a big Clothesline from Devon followed by a leg drop for a one count. Devon comes off the ropes but Morgan connects with a Discuss Clothesline for a nearfall of his own. Hernandez tags back in and locks a rear chin lock on Devon but Devon breaks it up with back elbows and then comes off the ropes only to eat a big shoulder block for another nearfall. Hernandez lifts Devon up and puts him on the top rope. Hernandez goes up top with him and goes for a Superplex but Devon blocks it and bites the forehead of Hernandez! Devon shoves Hernandez off the top and then hits a Diving Headbutt! Both men are down and they tag out at the same time. Bubba connects with some big jabs on Morgan and then attempts to whip Morgan into the ropes, but Morgan blocks it and attempts a clothesline. Bubba ducks it and goes for a German Suplex but Morgan counters with back elbows. Morgan goes for the Carbon Footprint but Bubba catches his foot to block it and then connects with the German Suplex! Hernandez comes in but eats a Samoan Drop from Bubba! 3D then hit the Reverse 3D on Morgan! 1…2…NO Hernandez breaks it up! Hernandez connects the forearms on both members of 3D but thy come back with a double shoulder block. Bubba hits a Scoop Slam and then Devon climbs to the top but the Nasty Boys run out and shove Devon off the top as the referee was checking on Hernandez! Hernandez goes for a clothesline on Bubba but he counters into a Bubba Bomb attempt. Hernandez blocks it and shoves Bubba into the Carbon Footprint from Morgan! 1…2…3 and they retain the titles!

Winners & STILL Tag Champs: Hernandez & Morgan via pinfall (Carbon Footprint)

The Nasty Boys bring a chair out and are about to lay 3D out further but Hernandez & Morgan come back and run them off. Hernandez and Morgan help 3D up and explain what just happened to them. They fist bump with the champs and walk out.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

“Samoan Submission Machine” Samoa Joe vs. Jesse Neal

This is the first time we’ve see Neal since Hogan and company has arrived. Tenay reminds us that Joe still has a TNA Title show in the bank. Neal jumps Joe as he comes into the ring but Joe lays him out with a T-Bone Suplex! Joe lays into Neal in the corner with jabs and chops and then he whips Neal into the opposite corner and connects with a Running Back Elbow! Joe then lays Neal out with a Leaping Enziguri! Neal tries to fight back but Joe lays him out with a headbutt. Neal pokes Joe’s eyes and then hits a Running Forearm. Neal climbs up to the top and dives off the top with a Flying Cross Body but Joe just nonchalantly steps aside. Joe connects the some SICKENING open hand strikes and then he whips Neal into the corner and connects with the Flying Knee Strike! Joe puts Neal up top and hits the Muscle Buster and screams “AJ!” as he hits it! 1…2…3!

Winner: Joe via pinfall (Muscle Buster)

In the back Christy approaches Hogan and asks him how he feels about what Kurt said earlier. He doesn’t know what Kurt said so Christy tells him. Hogan says this is just another thing that he didn’t do that Kurt is blaming him for. Hogan says that he is easy to find so tell Kurt to come see him. Christy tells Hogan that Kurt said he would be coming for Hogan later and Hogan says he’ll be waiting.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Non Title Match
“The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero vs. “The Phenomenal” AJ Styles w/Ric Flair

This a first time ever matchup right here! Taz likens Flair and AJ’s relationship to that of a great NFL QB with a legendary coach in his corner. AJ and Pope lockup and Pope gets AJ in a wristlock right off the bat, but AJ quickly forces Dinero into the corner so the referee will have to come in and break it up. AJ connects with a series of chops but Dinero pimp slaps AJ! AJ charges at Pope but he hits a drop toe hold and then floats over into a Front Chancery. Dinero transitions into a wristlock but AJ quickly reverses it and kicks Dinero in the gut. AJ goes for a scoop slam but Dinero blocks it and connects a series of Elbow’s to the top of AJ’s head. Dinero then mocks AJ and Flair and connects with a big right! Dinero whips AJ into the ropes and hits a Backdrop! AJ slides out to the floor to catch a breather and get some advice from Naitch.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Back from commercials Dinero shoves AJ into the ropes but AJ nails him with a shoulder block and then does the Flair strut! AJ comes off the ropes and Dinero goes for a backdrop but AJ blocks it and connects with an elbow and then a chop. AJ whips Dinero into the ropes and leapfrogs him and then connects with the Phenomenal Dropkick! AJ puts the boots to Dinero as he tries to get out of the ring and then catapults Dinero into the bottom rope in a sort of guillotine affect. AJ lights Dinero up with chops in the corner and Dinero answers him back until AJ connects with a big right hand and then he locks in a Camel Clutch on Dinero on the mat! Dinero gets to the ropes and then AJ chokes Dinero on the middle rope. AJ hits a Snap Suplex for a nearfall. AJ mounts Dinero and lays into Dinero with rights and lefts. Dinero comes back with some body shots on AJ and then he attempts to whip AJ into the ropes, but AJ reverses it only to have Dinero hit a Sunset Flip! 1…2…NO AJ kicks out and then connects with a big Running Back Elbow! AJ locks in a rear chin lock on Dinero now but Dinero gets to his feet and breaks it up with back elbows only to have AJ slam Dinero to the mat by his head. AJ puts the boots to Dinero and then measures Dinero for a big right hand, but Pope blocks it and connects with a series of rights and lefts of his own. Dinero ducks another right hand attempt and shows that amateur boxing history with his hand speed connecting with some beautiful body shots on AJ followed by a big right hook! Dinero hits an Atomic Drop and then a Flying Shoulder Block! 1…2…NO AJ kicks out! Pope is starting to get on a roll but AJ cuts him off with a rake of the eyes followed by a Leaping Enziguri! Flair talks trash to Pope from ringside and AJ goes for a Flying Forearm Smash in the corner, but Dinero moves and lights AJ up with a big chop. Dinero goes for the Coronation (Running Body Guillotine as the opponent is draped over the middle rope) but AJ moves out of the way hanging Dinero up in the ropes. AJ grabs Dinero and goes for a Vertical Suplex but Pope blocks it and rolls AJ up with a Small Package out of nowhere! 1…2…3!

Winner: Dinero via pinfall (small package)

After the match Dinero doesn’t even have time to celebrate as Flair gets in the ring and attacks him along with AJ! Flair lights Dinero up with chops and rights but Samoa Joe’s music hits and h runs out and makes the save! Joe with some nasty rights on AJ and then Flair turns Joe around and nails him with a chop but it has no affect on Joe! Flair freaks out and begs Joe off and then AJ chop blocks Joe from behind! AJ and Flair now double team Joe until Dinero makes the save for Joe! Joe clotheslines Flair out f the ring t the floor and then Dinero and Joe stomp on AJ until security runs out and holds them back!

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Back from commercials Flair is on the mic on the stage and asks Joe if he wants to die tonight as security is still holding Joe & Dinero back. Flair says Joe should know better and says that this is the new TNA and Joe will get his a** beat! Flair makes fun of Joe about being Samoan and then starts to run away when it looks like Joe is going to break away from security. Joe grabs a mic and screams at Flair to shut his mouth before he stomps the rest of the nature out of his a**! Joe calls AJ a scumbag and Flair says no he’s the World Champion, but Joe tells him to shut his mouth! Joe says he doesn’t care when it was whether they were friends or they hated each other AJ was ALWAYS a warrior! AJ says he gave it all up for a overpriced suit and some wholesale hookers! Joe says he needs to remind AJ how to be a man and a champion and that’s why he is cashing in his title shot at Against All Odds! Joe says from this day until then he will have to go to sleep knowing he has to face the inevitable (pointing at himself) and wake up knowing he has to face the inevitable. Joe tells Pope he thinks they go give Flair & AJ a preview of what the inevitable is! Pope lays security out with some right hands and they chase AJ and Flair to the back!

In the back Christy is with Angelina. She asks Angelina if she is worried about BP getting involved and she says definitely. She says if she was still in BP she would get involved and says she taught them everything they know but didn’t teach them everything she knows. She says she would’ve never tried to replace Angelina Love because you can’t. Angelina says tonight is about her title shot and says success is the best revenge and she is awesome at revenge.

In the back Nash is with Eric Young when Bischoff walks in. Bischoff acts like he doesn’t know who Young is and he introduces himself. Bischoff asks Young to leave and then Bischoff sits down with Nash. Bischoff says he needs a favor from Nash. He says he needs Nash to destroy Foley tonight and Nash says he needs him to do him a favor but Pac and Hall still don’t have contracts. Bischoff says they are screwups and they won’t follow the rules. He says he’s sick of that and there is nothing he can do about it. Bischoff says that he can play to that same tune that Pac and Hall play to or he can go out and destroy Foley for him.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Back from commercials footage is shown form 2 months ago when Foley jumped Nash in the Impact Zone after Nash set up the fake meeting between Foley and Nash.

In the back Christy is with Mick Foley and she asks if Foley is planning on falling in line. Foley says he will face Nash tonight and Foley says he is no longer mad at Nash, but the more he thinks about what Nash did to him the hotter he gets. Abyss walks up still freaking out and he asks Foley if he’ll fall in line. Foley says his job will be safe and Abyss needs to do him a favor and that’s promising him that he will stay away from the ring no matter what happens between Foley and Nash tonight.

8-Card Stud Tournament Qualifying Match
Tomko vs. “Olympic Hero” Kurt Angle

Angle immediately connects with a German Suplex on Tomko but then eats a Big Boot from Tomko! Both men get right to their feet and go nose-to-nose! Angle nails Tomko with a headbutt and then a series of rights and a clothesline that sends Tomko over the top to the floor! Angle follows him out and slams Tomko into the ring steps and rolls Tomko back into the ring. Angle charges at Tomko but eats a Snap Powerslam from Tomko! He whips Angle into the corner and nails him with a running Clothesline and then he grabs Angle and whips Angle into the ring post. Tomko hits a Powerslam for a nearfall and then locks in a Rear Chinlock on Angle. Angle fights to his feet and breaks the hold with back elbows and then comes off the ropes but Tomko grabs him by the throat and hits a Chokeslam. Tomko climbs to the top but Angle quickly gets to the top and hits the Belly-to-Belly Superplex on Tomko! Both guys are down now and finally Angle gets to his feet and hits the Rolling German Suplexes on Tomko! As he went for the third one Tomko blocked it and threw Angle into the corner. Tomko charges but Angle moves and hits the Angle Slam! 1…2…NO Tomko kicks out! Tomko comes out of nowhere with a Lariat! Tomko goes for the Chainsaw Kick but Angle ducks and hit more Rolling German Suplexes! This time Angle goes old school and connects with 5! Angle grabs Tomko’s ankle and locks in the Ankle Lock! Angle drops down to the and great veins the leg which causes Tomko to tap!

Winner: Angle via submission (Ankle Lock)

Mr. Anderson, Hernandez, Desmond Wolfe, & Kurt Angle are all now in the Tournament for Against All Odds with 4 more yet to be named.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Footage is shown from TNA’s tour of Europe this past week and then a nice video package highlighting the issues between Foley and Nash from the last few months is shown.

Nash enters Hogan’s office and he talks about the conversation he had with Bischoff and says he’s down, but he asks for another chance for Pac and Hall. Hogan says they’ve had enough chances and he has done everything he could for them. Nash says now more than ever they need him but Hogan says they’re acting crazier than they ever have now. Hogan says Nash just needs to get away from them but he wants Hogan to keep an open mind about them. Hogan tells Nash not to let them suck him again because ‘you know how they are.’

A video package is shown highlighting Angelina and the Beautiful People’s past.

TNA Knockouts Championship
Tara (c) vs. Angelina Love

Tara and Angelina lockup and Tara gets the advantage with a side headlock and then she hits a side headlock takeover. Tara holds onto the side headlock as they hit the mat but Angelina is able to roll Tara over and get a one count before Tara rolls back over. Angelina is able to counter out with a head scissors but Tara counters right back by rolling frontwards into a bridging pin for a nearafll. Angelina bridges out of the pin and right into a Backslide! 1…NO Tara kicks out!

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Angelina and Tara are engrossed in a Greco-Roman Knucklelock as we come back from commercials and Angelina is able to lock Tara into Hammerlock and even hit a Hammerlock Armdrag holding onto the Hammerlock on the mat. Angelina puts her knee into the ribs of Tara and then locks in a wristlock but Tara is able to cartwheel out of the move into a wristlock of her own. I do believe we have a wardrobe malfunction here as Tara’s chest is blurred out! How did nobody get a picture of that of all the people that was there live (just asking)? Angelina with a single leg takedown for a nearfall and then she slams Tara headfirst into the top turnbuckle and then she slams her into the opposite turnbuckle. Tara comes back and slams Angelina’s head into the turnbuckle and then whips her into the opposite corner and charges at her, but Angelina is able to lift herself up onto the top rope over the charging Tara and then roll her up! 1…2…NO Tara kicks out! Tara comes back with a kick to the gut and then the Spider’s Web (Fireman’s Carry into Spinning Sidewalk Slam)! 1…2…NO Angelina kicks out! Angelina comes back with a forearm and then she whips Tara into the ropes and goes for the Botox Injection, but Tara ducks and goes for the Widows Peak! Angelina blocks it and counters into a rollup but Tara rolls through and gets the pin!

Winner & STILL Knockouts Champ: Tara via pinfall

After the match Angelina and Tara shake hands and Angelina raises Tara’s hand. It actually looked like Angelina tried to tell her about the boobage slipping out but the Beautiful People run out and jump Angelina. They put the boots to Angelina as Tara just watches and finally she lays out BP. Angelina throws some big rights as well as both girls clean house. Velvet is able to escape without Angelina getting her hands on her though.

In the parking lot Scott Hall & Syxx-Pac are shown sneaking around.

—COMMERCIAL BREAK—

Back from commercials Angle walks into Hogan’s office and screams at him to explain to him how Hogan shakes his hand and then 10 seconds later ‘his cronies’ jump him. Hogan says he refused to give Pac (who Hogan refers to as X-Pac) and Hall contracts because they’re thugs and now Angle thinks he hired them to do his dirty work. Hogan says Angle’s temper is the problem here. Angle says he’s worried about Hogan’s agenda and says he doesn’t trust Hogan as far as he can throw him. He says he knows what Hogan is all about and he’s heard all the horror stories about the people he’s done business with. Angle says Hogan needs to understand that he won’t screw with him the way he’s screwed with ‘them’ and he needs to consider this his final warning. Hogan tells Angle he needs to do himself a favor and get out of his office, please. Angle slams his fists on Hogan’s desk and then storms out.

No DQ Match
“Big Sexy” Kevin Nash vs. “Hardcore Legend” Mick Foley

Kevin Nash does his best Raven impersonation by rolling a shopping cart full of weapons out to the ring while Foley brought out his trademark barbed wire baseball bat. Foley swings his bat at Nash who blocks the shots with a garbage can. Finally the trash can is beat up so bad that Nash just flings it at Foley (who knocks it away with the bat) and picks up a chair. Foley swings the bat at Nash more and he blocks it with the chair this time and then he picks up a hockey stick and hits Foley in the legs with it as he charged in with the bat. Nash picks up the barbed wire bat and tries to scrape it on Foley’s face but Foley blocks it and is able to hit a mule kick to Nash’s balls! Foley with a running forearm and now the brawl spills out to the floor where Foley slams Nash into the guardrail and then the ring apron. Foley gets back in the ring and grabs a picture frame but Foley hesitates which allows Nash to nail him with a Big Boot for the pin. That whole thing was VERY sloppy.

Winner: Nash via pinfall (Big Boot)

It’s shown that the reason Foley hesitated was because the picture was the stupid picture of him and Borash. We see Hall and Pac coming down through the crowd now! Hall and Pac attack Nash out of nowhere! Pac hits a vision Spinning Heel Kick and then Hall puts the boots to him! What the hell?! Hall turns his attention to Foley and stomps on him while Pac continues to beat on Nash. Hall and Pac taunt the crowd and Nash as everyone wonders what the hell just happened.

It’s line-crossing time!!!

Cross the line!

We open with Matt Morgan and a baseball bat. Morgan wants to smash Kurt Angle’s head in with said bat. Angle and the Main Event Mafia get him in the ring and Angle explains that he didn’t pin Morgan and keep the title on purpose. He just fell on him after thinking that he had hit Sting. They agree to team up and take on Team 3D in a tables match. I was late getting to the show, so I missed most of this.

Match #1: Beer Money vs. The British Invasion: This was a street fight, and a non-title match. I’m still getting caught up, so specific moves are not being detailed right now. Loud chants of “We want tables!” Kendo sticks, trash cans, plastic bags, and both members of Beer Money in street clothes. Berr Money dominates rather well. Storm gets knocked off the ring post, but Roode gets in and puts Brutus Magnus through a trash can and gets the pin for the win. Magnus and Roode were very bloody.

To the back! Lauren interviews the Beautiful People. They sit on their thrones. Madison Rayne has been kicked to the curb, and TBP will get her tonight. Short but awesomely fun promo, as per usual from TBP.

To the back! Cody Deaner and ODB argue loudly over Deaner’s status as Knockouts champion. Foley and JB are talking, but Foley offers to help. Deaner uses Foley’s white board to visually demonstrate that when you make an assumption, you make an ass out of you and umption. Foley says that he will retreat to his inner sanctum, and issue a verdict on the Knockouts champion status next week on “iMPACT.” Abyss comes up and Foley thanks him for his help against Nash at the ppv. Foley gives Abyss a gift. “Is it groceries? I love groceries!” Foley tells Abyss that it isn’t groceries. It is, in fact, a blue flannel. Abyss cries. Foley says that there is no crying in wrestling. Abyss straightens up. Foley and Abyss discuss spilling their own blood. Foley wants his bat back.

Mike Tenay and Taz are the official broadcast team. Don West has been promoted within the merchandising company. Tenay and Taz run down the evening’s card.

Match #2: Madison Rayne vs. Angelina Love: Rayne enters to the Beautiful People’s music, alone and looking scared. Love jumps Rayne from behind and throws her into the barricade. Love manhandles Rayne to the ring. Love pins Rayne in a matter of seconds. Velvet Sky scampers down to the ring. TBP put the boots to Rayne, and give her the Brown Paper Bag treatment. Tara and Christy Hemme run to Rayne’s aid, and TBP bail.

The Motor City Machine Guns bring us all a public service message. Their lack of tv time has made their paychecks smaller. The MCMG are all about three things: Entertaining you, the fans. Getting laid. Getting paid. For $2000 an hour, you can hire their services. They’ll play video games, go see movies, or sit on your couch and do absolutely nothing while you make them dinner. Call now, and they’ll throw in a free Sham-Wow! I’ll continue this real-time when I get back from the bank. 

Match #3: Samoa Joe vs. Homicide: X-Division Champion Samoa Joe has a rematch against Homicide from the ppv. Joe’s strikes seem lacking in power. Joe hits a nice snap slam on Homicide, but Homicide kicks out at two. Joe continues to outpower Homicide, but the Notorious 187 refuses to stay down. Homicide uses speed, and takes Joe down, but can’t get the three-count. Joe gets the pin with a muscle buster. Clean win for Joe.

“The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero, totally pimped out, arrives in a chauffeured car.

To the back! Lauren interviews Tara, Christy Hemme, Sarita, and Taylor Wilde are very happy. Next week starts a Knockouts tag team tournament. Tara and Christy will team up, as will Taylor Wilde and Sarita. Tonight is the Four-way dance between Traci Brooks, Awesome Kong, Sarita, and Christy Hemme.

Match #4: Awesome Kong (w/ Raisha Saeed) vs. Traci Brooks (w/ Sharmell) vs. Sarita (w/ Taylor Wilde) vs. Christy Hemme (w/ Tara): This was a four-way singles match. Kong and Sarita start. Kong totally outpowers Sarita. Sarita pulls the ropes and Kong goes over the top and hits the floor. Sarita takes down Traci with a spinning head scissors. Traci and Christy slap at each other. Kong clotheslines Traci on the floor. Sarita flies over the top and takes out Kong. We go to a commercial break. When we return, Christy goes for the FFCLG, but Kong plants her. Christy later hits the FFCLD on Traci, but Kong hits Christy with the Implant Buster. Sarita tries a missile dropkick, but Kong catches her and throws her down. While Kong climbs to the top turnbuckle, Traci rolls over and steals the pin on Christy. Traci gets the win. KONG MAD! KONG SMASH! Kong throws chairs as the remaining Knockouts bail up the ramp.

Consequences Creed (w/ Jay Lethal) is in the ring when we return from a commercial break.

Match #5: “The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero vs. Consequences Creed: Lethal is sent to the back by the ref. Pope and Creed exchange arm holds. Creed hits a springboard clothesline, and takes down Pope. Pope returns the favor with a stiff punch. Pope hits a Bronco Buster from behind, sliding through the ropes to the floor. Pope follows up with a barrage of stiff punches and a sleeper hold. Creed fights to his feet. Pope goes for a kick, but Creed catches the foot. Pope is all charisma and flash, a total major league player. Pope pulls down his knee pads and hits Creed with a running double knee to the back. Pope gets the pin and win. Post-match, the lights go out and Suicide’s music plays. Suicide rushes the ring and attacks Pope. Pope bails and looks at Suicide with the Booker T googly eyes. Suicide gestures at Pope with the slice across the throat.

AJ Styles walks toward the ring from backstage.

To the back! Lauren interviews Matt Morgan, asking him if he’s buying what Angle said earlier. Morgan claims that he’s totally buying it because Kurt Angle never lies. He slips up and says Angle will get his “boot” instead of his “back.” Morgan blames his inexperience and nervousness.

To the ring! AJ Styles is in street clothes. He has a mic. The audience chants his name loudly. He says that he’s had it pretty rough for the last few weeks. He always had it rough, but he never quit. He is proud of the man that he has become. More “AJ!” chants. What he isn’t so proud of is losing the Legends title, losing the matches against Matt Morgan, and losing friends like Eric Young and Samoa Joe. He has already missed half the lives of his kids while he’s on the road, and when he is home, he can’t stop being bothered by things like this from work. He yells at his family over petty things because he’s hung up on the work problems. It isn’t worth it. It’s time for AJ Styles to say goodbye to professional wrestling. He loves the TNA fans, and he’s sorry. Sting walks out in street clothes and sunglasses. Loud crowd chants of “Sting!” Sting grabs a mic. He asks AJ if that’s the legacy that AJ really wants to leave after seven years. He says that AJ is saying, “I quit.” He’s quitting on his wife, his kids, the fans, the little kids who want to be him. Sting takes off the glasses and tells AJ that he’s quitting on him too. Right now, AJ is a loser because quitting is what losers do. Does AJ think that Sting hasn’t suffered, both professionally and personally? He hasn’t quit in over twenty years. He wanted to pass the torch to somebody, somebody who could bring honor, dignity, and respect back to the business. He had been talking about AJ the whole time. AJ is, or was, the Chosen One. AJ can either go home and quit, or go in the back, lace up his boots, and claim what is his. AJ is near tears, but he stops, and hugs Sting. Sting says that AJ is supposed to be ”The Man,” and tells AJ to come with him. They leave up the ramp together as Taz and Tenay wonder if AJ has really quit or not.

To the back! Lauren asks Hernandez when he plans to cash in his briefcase for a World title shot. Hernandez says that the night he cashes it in will be the night he becomes World Heavyweight Champion. Eric Young interrupts, and tells Hernandez to come talk to him, presumably about joining World Elite. 

To the announce table! “The Boss” Bobby Lashley comes to the announce table, and says that next week will be the TNA television debut of TNA President Dixie Carter. She will announce, among other things, Bobby Lashley’s role in TNA. Tenay invites Lashley to stay at the table and join the commentary. He accepts.

Match #6: Team 3D vs. Matt Morgan and Kurt Angle: Team 3D enters first. Matt Morgan enters next. Kurt Angle enters, but makes a beeline for Lashley and attacks him at the announce table. Lashley fights back, but Angle makes it to the ring. This was a tables match. Angle and Brother Ray start. Typical Team 3D tables match, with lots of stiff punches and forearms. Team 3D targets Angle’s neck. Morgan overpowers Devon. Team 3D double-teams Morgan over the ropes, and follow up on Angle. When we return from commercial break, Devon leaps off the rope to deliver the Wazzup. “Get the tables!” Team 3D sets up the tables in the ring. Morgan rolls into the ring and clotheslines Team 3D from behind. Morgan moves a table and gestures for a chokeslam. Morgan chokeslams Devon, but Ray moves the table. Angle tags in. Angle goes after Devon, whose mouth appears to be bleeding. Angle goes for an Angle Slam through a table, but Morgan moves the table just as Devon reverses the move. Morgan rushes at another table with a Carbon Footprint, but breaks the table on his own. The match continues, as no one was put through a table by an opponent. Team 3D dominates, and Ray hits Angle with a super kick on the floor. Ray brings another table from the backstage area. Angle fights off Team 3D alone in the ring. Angle calls Morgan into the ring afterwards. Morgan’s knee is still bad from the bothced kick through the table. Angle orders Morgan to the top rope, but Morgan’s knee can’t handle it. Team 3D grab him on the top rope and throw Morgan through the table. Team 3D wins.  Post-match, Angle and Morgan yell at each other.

The End.

Cross the line!

Match #1: Christy Hemme defeats Sojo Bolt: We open going straight into the match, which is awesome. Christy looks great, and is better in the ring than she has ever been. Not top-of-the-card Knockouts action, by any means, but she certainly didn’t embarrass herself.

Tenay and West run down tonight’s card, and a split screen shows AJ Styles and Matt Morgan entering the arena.

Lauren interviews Taz about Samoa Joe’s loss to Hernandez. Taz says that Joe let himself down. Joe beat Joe. Taz will motivate Joe, and turn a negative into a positive. Homicide will be the one to suffer, and Joe will put him out. Solid promo with excellent delivery by Taz.

Match #2: Hernandez defeats Doug Williams: I still don’t like Hernandez’s new music. Hernandez holds Williams up in a suplex for an eternity before landing a backbreaker over his shoulder. Brutus Magnus distracts Hernandez, and Williams takes control. Williams targets the neck and shoulders. Williams goes to the top turnbuckle, but misses a back senton. Don West is awesome! He says that the TNA fans aren’t the smartest of people, are the chants of “USA! USA!” for the Mexican or the Brit? Williams goes for a top rope cross body, but Hernandez catches him and plants him with a sit-down powerbomb for the win. Brutus magnus attacks hernandez post-match, but Hernandez disposes of him. Rob Terry attacks Hernandez with the “Feast or Fired” briefcase, and knocks him down. The British Invasion bails, and Hernandez gives chase once he regains his footing.

To the back! Hernandez grabs the mic from Lauren and yells something in Spanich. He leaves.

To the Mike Tenay sit-down interview! It’s with Bobby Lashley. Tenay says that he has followed every second of Lashley’s WWE career, and that professional wrestling wasn’t enough for him. Way to insult everyone, Mike. Is it possible to be successful in pro wrestling and MMA at the same time? Lashley says that he can. Tenay brings up the Main Event Mafia and Kurt Angle’s desire to be the greatest wrestler ever. Who would win between the greatest wrestler ever and the greatest MMA fighter ever? Lashley says that the fans will.

Jeremy Borash interviews Dr. Stevie (with a smokin’ hot Daffney) about his bounty on the head of Abyss. Dr. Stevie talks about defeating and destroying “Chris.” Abyss rushes in, grabs Dr. Stevie by the throat, and tells him to finish the job himself. Abyss is attacked by a chair-wielding “Outlaw” Jethro Holiday. For some reason.

To the back! Lauren interviews Tara, who has Poison crawling over her arm. Tara talks about Awesome Kong, and Lauren talks up the four-way Knockouts match. Tara is in creepy mode, and I likes it.

Match #3: Eric Young and Sheik Abdul Bashir (w/ Kiyoshi) defeat Rhino and Jesse Neal: Jesse Neal has the same haircut and ring gear that he had for his first match, which is appalling. Neal and Young (Ha! See what I did there?) start out. Rhino tags in and works over Young’s midsection. Neal tags back in. Tenay and West talk up the problems between Neal and Rhino. Young drives Neal into his corner, and Bashir tags in. Bashir tags in Young. Young levels Neal with a clothesline. Tenay and West talk up the “Steel Asylum” match that will take place at “Hard Justice.” The winner will be the Number One Contender to the X-Division title. Alex Shelley, Chris Sabin, Consequences Creed, Jay Lethal, Amazing Red, Suicide, and a debuting “Pope” D’Angelo Dinero (formerly known as Elijah Burke) are in it. Why am I afraid that Dinero/Burke is going to be handed the win and a shot at the X-Division title for his debut match that happens to be on a ppv, and the true X-Division guys will get shoved aside yet again? I hope that I’m wrong. Young and Bashir isolate Neal, and quickly tag each other in and out. Rhino is not happy. Neal has a chance to tag in Rhino, but attacks Bashir instead. Young grabs his trunks and rolls Neal up for the pin. Post-match, Rhino yells at Neal and slaps him. When Neal turns away, Rhino sets up and Gores him. Tenay and West play Rhino up as the face.

To the back! Lauren interviews Rhino about his treatment of Jesse Neal, actually getting some bass in her voice and challenging Rhino about it. “What do you think this is, the Lifetime Channel?” Awesome! Rhino delivers a strong promo about respecting what Neal has done in the military, but doubting that Neal can handle wrestling.

Match #4: Tara defeats ODB (w/ Cody Deaner), Angelina Love (w/ Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky), andAwesome Kong (w/ Raisha Saeed): Kong and Tara go after each other, while The Beautiful People bail and hide from Cody Deaner. ODB drinks from her flask, and shares it with Tara. Tara “Hulks up” and smacks her own boobs. ODB climbs to the top and leaps off onto Kong, Raisha Saeed, and Cody Deaner. Tara climbs to the top and leaps off on The Beautiful People. Tara smashes her head on the floor. Kong and Tara fight to the outside. Angelina Love takes out ODB with the Botox Injection bicycle kick. Kong broke up the count. ODB and Kong go. Kong womanhandles ODB, but ODB kicks out twice. Tara and Angelina Love fight outside the ring. Kong chokeslams ODB. Deaner hops up on the apron and screams at Kong. Deaner acts like he wants to fight Kong, but grabs her by the head and kisses her instead. Kong stares at Deaner, then pulls him into the ring and plants him with the Awesome Bomb. Tara runs in and rolls up Kong for the win.

To the back! Lauren talks to AJ Styles about his upcoming match against Matt Morgan. With the “Best of Three” series tied at one win each, AJ’s loss will put Sting at a huge disadvantage.

To the back! Jeremy Borash talks with Team 3D. I hate that Brother Devon talks respectfully about Booker T and Scott Steiner. More kissing up to Harlem Heat and the Steiner Brothers, neither of which are current teams. Talking up the Team 3D versus Booker T and Scott Steiner tag team title match.

Match #5: Scott Steiner (w/ Booker T and Sharmell) defeats Brother Ray (w/ Brother Devon): This was a “No DQ” match. Steiner gets the mic and blah blah blah. Brother Ray takes a mic and kisses up to Harlem Heat and the Steiner Brothers, before pointing out that garbage is also a household name, and, like them, it’s getting old and stinking. Slow, plodding, power game. Sharmell and Booker interfere. Ray takes Steiner’s chain mail headdress and puts it on. The British Invasion come down and distract, allowing Booker and Steiner to put Ray through a table and get the win. This was barely a match, and far too short for this sort of thing. With interference almost right away, it was pointless.

To the contract signing! Mike Tenay oversees as Mick Foley and Kevin Nash sign contracts for the Legends title match on Sunday at teh “Hard Justice” ppv. Both guys have final pre-match comments. Foley says that he doesn’t think that he’s ever had a conversation with Nash that didn’t revolve around money. Doesn’t a sense of pride or accomplishment meananything to Nash? Nash tells Foley that he could have made $20,000 at the past weekend’s authograph session, which he thinks that Foley cost him. Why doesn’t Foley take the easy way out, like Nash always has? Foley says that Nash may look down on him, but he loves wrestling with the sort of passion that would allow him to do it for free. Nash strips down and calls himself an athlete and a businessman, while Foley is a pathetic wrestler. Foley says that he’ll bring his set of skills on Sunday, and Nash can bring his, and they’ll see what happens. Foley says that they’re on a wrestling show, in a wrestling ring, with a title contract for a wrestling match, and nobody’s going through that table? Nash says that he doesn’t get paid for that, so he won’t go through it or put Mick through it for free. Mick says that he would put Nash through the table for free, and then announces that he thinks that he will go through the table for free. Foley runs off the ropes and hurls himself through the table. People cheer.

To the video package for the “Steel Asylum” match!

To the back! Lauren interviews Matt Morgan. Morgan feels no pressure, and is completely confident that he will win. He guarantees victory, in fact.

Match #6: Matt Morgan (w/ Kurt Angle) defeats AJ Styles (w/ Sting): This was the rubber match to determine the third man in the three-way dance at “Hard Justice” for the World Heavyweight title. AJ takes the match to Morgan by running the ropes and landing a flip dive over the top rope. AJ and Morgan fight on the floor, and AJ takes Morgan down with a flying forearm. Morgan is finally rolled into the ring and the bell rings to start the match. AJ puts Morgan in the Figure Four leg lock for a long time. Morgan screams, but won’t tap. Morganmakes it to the ropes, and AJ breaks the hold. Morgan gets his wind back, and uses his power against AJ. Morgan dominates AJ. Don West says that Angle has announced that this is Morgan’s last test for MEM membership. If Morgan wins this match, and helps him retain the title, he’ll be in. AJ kicks out several times, but Morgan continues to toy with him, and won’t allow AJ a chance to get in any offense. Morgan goes for the Carbon Footprint in the corner, but AJ dodges and lands a few punches. AJ hits a missile dropkick, but Morgan kicks out at two. Morgan catches AJ in a side slam, but AJ kicks out at two. AJ hits a Pele out of nowhere, but Morgan kicks out just in time. Morgan takes AJ’s head off with a Carbon Footprint, and gets the pin. Matt Morgan, Kurt Angle, and Sting will fight in the “Hard Justice” main event. Post-match, the entire MEM comes to the ring, applauding. Angle gets a mic.

Angle praises Morgan, and claims that the MEM was scouting him to recruit him all along. Morgan says that he thought that he was selling himself to the MEM, not the other way around. Angle says that Morgan has one last little thing to do before getting in to the MEM. Morgan says that Angle can’t possibly be asking him to help Angle retain the title. Angle says that he’s not asking it, he’s demanding it. Morgan calls Angle “little man,” and tells him that no one demands anything of “The Blueprint.” He isn’t passing up this opportunity, and he will be walking out of the match as the new World Heavyweight Champion. Angle is furious, and has to be restrained by the MEM as Morgan exits up the ramp. Morgan’s face turn is here.

“Hard Justice” Predictions:

Bounty Match: Abyss vs. Jethro Holiday

Abyss needs the win here.

Winner gets World Heavyweight title shot from the “Feast or Fired” briefcase: Hernandez vs. Big Rob Terry

Hernandez has got to get the win here.

New Japan IWGP Tag Team Championship match:  The British Invasion (champs) vs. Beer Money

The British Invasion retains, if only because New Japan already issued one statement (later retracted) that they didn’t recognize the title change, and it can’t possibly happen again.

“Steel Asylum” match (winner is #1 Contender for the X-Division title): Alex Shelley vs. Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal vs. Consequences Creed vs. Daniels vs. Suicide vs. Amazing Red

If there were a god, Chris Sabin would win. That being said, Jay Lethal won the last one. I’m picking Daniels to win. This is all null and void if Don West was right, and Elijah Burke debuts as “The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero in this match. If he does, you can just hand him the win, as that’s the track record here. 

Knockouts Championship title match: Angelina Love (w/ Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky) vs. ODB (w/ Cody Deaner)

Angelina retains. Please.

X-Division title match: Homicide vs. Samoa Joe (w/ Taz)

Homicide retains. He hasn’t had the title long, and there’s been no focus on it since he won it. He shouldn’t lose it yet.

Tag Team Championship match: Booker T and Scott Steiner (champs) vs. Team 3D

Team 3D should win here. I doubt that they will, but they should.

Legends Championship match: Mick Foley (champ) vs. Kevin Nash

Foley retains. Why let him win it if he’s going to lose it right away?

World Heavyweight title match: Kurt Angle (champ) vs. Matt Morgan vs. Sting

Angle retains. It’s Angle, duh.

That’s it for the real-time. Check back Sunday for a review of “Hard Justice!”

Peace out,

Drowgoddess

Greetings, fellow line-crossers!

JB and Lauren sound completely hoarse and strained vocally.

Lauren interviews Beer Money. Robert Roode talks at length in a sympathetic and reverent manner about Team 3D and their IWGP Tag Team title defense in Japan just before the TNA ppv. Beer Money bursts into hysterical laughter and talk about not caring at all that Team 3D would do something like that, and that they will still win.  

Pre-show: Eric Young & Rhino vs. The British Invasion

Brutus Magnus and Doug Williams enter, accompanied by Rob Terry. Eric Young enters, looking disdainful of the whole thing. Rhino enters last, accompanied by two “special managers” who had won some kind of TNA promotion. Rhino was hugely over, and loud “Rhino!” chants kickstarted the match. Rhino extends the hand to make a tag, and EY pulls away. He drops down to the floor and refuses to make the tag. EY walks up the ramp to the back, where he is confronted by Jesse Neal. EY shoves Neal and exits. Neal moves to ringside, while the British Invasion works over Rhino. Magnus and Williams shake hands while double-teaming Rhino. Referee Rudy Charles yells at Neal for his presence, and Neal says that EY left. Charles appears to be ok with Neal filling in as Rhino’s partner. Rhino eventually tags in Neal, who cleans house at first. The British Invasion hits him with their double-team finishing move, and get the pin and victory. Rhino looks incredibly angry about the entire situation.

Lauren interviews Sting. Sting is confident, not overconfident like Matt Morgan. He says “Matt” many times. He’s confident because of his twenty-something years in the business, and his mission is what it always was: to return respect to TNA.

The song used with the opening video package is by the Goldy Locks Band. Yes, as in she who was once a manager in the early days of TNA.

X-Division title match (King of the Mountain)
Suicide vs. Jay Lethal vs. Consequences Creed vs. Alex Shelley vs. Chris Sabin

Is this match first because it could be the match of the night, and having it first might pull some last-minute buys? Lance Storm says that putting your third-biggest match as the opener is the way to go, so that would certainly make sense here. KOTM rules are clearly explained by Mike Tenay. Curtis Granderson of the Detroit Tigers gets his own entrance, and comes out first. Jay Lethal enters first, Alex Shelley second (to a huge reaction), Consequences Creed third, Chris Sabin fourth (to another huge reaction), and lastly, the champion Suicide. “Can’t he just come in the regular way?” Don West, you funny, funny man! Suicide appears on the top of the KOTM penalty cage. All four guys rush Suicide and beat him down. Huge chants of “Motor City!” Suicide takes out all four guys with a ladder to big cheers. Suicide Solution onto the ladder on Lethal for a pin. Suicide is eligible, Lethal goes to the penalty box. Suicide pins Shelley, and Shelley goes to the penalty box. Suicide and Lethal go, Sabin throws a chair at Suicide’s head. Sabin invites Lethal to use the chair, then sits down in it. Lethal hits the Lethal Combination on Suicide onto the chair, causing Sabin to jump up at the last second. Lethal pins Suicide, with Sabin and Creed piled on top of him. Lethal is now eligible, and Suicide goes into the penalty box. Lethal Consequences and the MCMG jump around in a circle, doing the luche libre celebratory arm pump. Creed pins Shelley, making Creed eligible and sending Shelley to the penalty box again. Suicide monkeyflips Sabin onto the ladder. Sabin climbs the ladder to the top of the penalty box and makes a spectacular leap to the floor, taking out Suicide and Lethal Consequences. Shelley tries to climb the ladder without the belt, and is told no. Shelley and Sabin look at each other, and Sabin drops to the mat for Shelley to pin. Sabin fights the pin just a little, and claims that Shelley pulled his tights. Shelley gets the belt and climbs the ladder while Sabin goes to the penalty box.  When he gets out, Sabin hits a huge tornado DDT on Lethal. Now all five guys are eligible to win, and Lethal goes to the penalty box. Sabin hits the Cradleshock on Suicide, sets up the ladder, and climbs the ladder, but Suicide stops him. Sabin hits a hesitation dropkick on Suicide after putting him in the tree of woe, but as he climbs the ladder, Lethal comes back in. Shelley hits Lethal with a frog splash. Creed hits Shelley with an enziguri. Sabin hits the ladder set up by Shelley back-first. Lethal drops a elbow on Sabin as he lays on the ladder. Shelley and Suicide hit the floor by the announce table. Creed and Shelley slug it out on the ring apron. Shelley superkicks Creed, then follows up with a Sliced Bread on the ring apron. Suicide goes after Shelley, who attempts a Sliced Bread on Suicide off the side of the penalty box. Huge booing when Suicide goes to put up the title belt. Lethal pushes over the ladder. Suicide ends up on top of the penalty box with the ladder. Suicide and Creed fight on the top of the penalty box with the ladder planted on Lethal’s back. Shelley sets up another ladder and climbs it, but Suicide leaps off the top of the penalty box and knocks Shelley to the floor. Suicide climbs the ladder and hangs the belt, retaining the X-Division title to smattered applause and lots of boos.

Winner and still X-Division Champion: Suicide   

 
Daniels vs. Shane Douglas (Second Chance match)

Douglas opens by yelling to cut his music and insults Detroit for treating a legend from Pittsburgh so poorly. Daniels enters next. Daniels dominates the opening. Douglas works over Daniels’s arm rather viciously, but Daniels hits the Best Moonsault Ever and scores the pin.

Winner and still on the TNA roster: Daniels

 
JB interviews Mick Foley in the back. JB doesn’t like Foley’s mathematical chances. Foley says that Jarrett won’t be against him after the bash that he threw him, and in terms of business, the two of them need to be on the same side and keep him champion for as long as possible. Foley will prepare for his next title defense at “Bound for Glory.” That’s “Bound for Glory” 2010, eighteen months from now.
Angelina Love vs. Tara (Knockouts title match)

Tara enters sporting a more MMA-style look. Her new shirt says, “Tara is Rising.” Coolness. Angelina Love enters with Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne, who stay at ringside. Don West’s commentary here is gold! A face-to-face standoff starts things. Tara dominates Love at first. Tara kicks Love through the ropes, and while the referee is checking on Love, Sky and Rayne jump Tara and throw her back in the ring. Love gets a two-count, hits a spinning heel kick, and gets a second two-count. Love distracts the referee again while Rayne and Sky throw Tara into the stairs. Tara is thrown back into the ring, but kicks out at two and a half. Tara’s punches look really stiff. Tara plants Love with a sidewalk slam, but doesn’t go for the cover. She goes to the floor and punches Sky in the face four times. Rayne runs up and gets several blows to the face for her trouble. Tara returns to the ring, only to get sprayed in the eyes with perfume or hair spray. Love pins her for the three-count.

Winner and still Knockouts Champion: Angelina Love

Lauren interviews Dr. Stevie, Raven, and Daffney backstage. Raven cuts a brilliant promo on Lauren and then on Abyss. Trust me, you have to see and hear it for yourself. The group hug with psychotic laughter that ends in what sounds like near-tears is the greatest ending ever.
Abyss & Taylor Wilde vs. Raven & Daffney (mixed tag team “Monster’s Ball” match)

Dr. Stevie, Raven, and Daffney enter first. Don West’s commentary here has to be heard to be believed. He talks about the faction reminding him of his own family and his crazy Uncle Clarence. Taylor and Abyss throw Raven and Daffney into each other. Abyss tosses Taylor over his head and she smashes into Raven and Daffney in the corner. Abyss charges into the corner, but Raven dodges and Abyss squashes Daffney. Taylor goes after Daffney and Abyss hits Raven with a trashcan. Abyss lifts Daffney up in a press slam and launches her over the ropes into Dr. Stevie and Raven. Taylor follows with a flying body press onto the group. Abyss and Raven brawl into the crowd. Daffney jumps on Abyss’s back, but Taylor slams a pair of trash can lids into the sides of Daffney’s head. Taylor and Daffney go at it on the floor, and Raven and Abyss continue brawling into the crowd. Taylor climbs up on top of some speakers and sound equipment and leaps off to splash Daffney through a table. Raven gets a kendo stick and hits Abyss with it. Abyss gets busted open after he pulls out a bag of thumbtacks. Taylor hits Raven with a trashcan lid while he chokes Abyss on the ropes. Daffney takes out Taylor in return. Abyss hits Raven with the kendo stick. Dr. Stevie distracts the referee, but gets knocked down from ringside. Abyss launches Taylor onto Raven, but Dr. Stevie grabs the referee’s leg and stops the count. Abyss pours a bag of tacks out onto the mat. Daffney sneaks up behind Abyss and hits him. Daffney gets caught between Abyss and the tacks, and begs off. Taylor throws Daffney onto the tacks! Taylor goes for the pin, but Dr. Stevie breaks it up. Abyss goes to chokeslam Dr. Stevie onto the tacks, but Raven stops it. Abyss plants Raven with a Black Hole Slam onto the tacks and gets the win.

Winners: Abyss and Taylor Wilde

JB interviews Jeff Jarrett in the locker room. Jarrett has said that he has no desire to be champion again, but he has also said that tonight, he takes his company back. Isn’t that contradictory? Jarrett says no. He doesn’t want the responsibility of being champion because he has enough to do running the company. He will win back the title to stop Mick Foley’s reign of terror and get his company back on track. He will figure out what to do with the World title after he wins it tonight.

Matt Morgan vs. Sting (winner gets spot in the Main Event Mafia)   

Morgan overpowers Sting. The reaction for Sting coming out was HUUUGE! Morgan throws Sting into the rail, and they fight on the floor. Morgan throws Sting back into the ring. Sting cuts Morgan off as he tries to get back in the ring. They fight on the floor again, and Sting kicks Morgan in the back of the leg. They get back in the ring, and Sting continues to work over the leg of Morgan. Morgan gets the upper hand and dominates Sting again, slamming himto the mat. Tenay and West talk a great deal about the match between Morgan and Kurt Angle, and the respect that Angle seemed to show Morgan then. Morgan squashes Sting in the corner, hits him with a sidewalk slam, and gets a two-count. Morgan chokes Sting on the ropes, then moves to choke holds on the mat. Sting throws some punches, but they lack power. Sting hits a high-risk jump, but walks into a Carbon Footprint and gets a two-count. Morgan attempts the Hellavator, but Sting gets out of it. Sting hits the Scorpion Death Drop on Morgan, but Morgan kicks out at two. Sting applies the Scorpion Death Lock, but Morgan powers out quickly. Sting hits the Scorpion Death Drop from the second rope and gets the three-count.

Winner (and still in the Main Event Mafia): Sting

Lauren interviews Samoa Joe and AJ Styles. AJ says that they’re taking the company back and putting it in the hands of the guys who built it. Joe is targeting Angle tonight, and he has already taken out the rest of the Main Event Mafia, one by one. He is hunting, and tonight, he and AJ will become the most powerful force in the history of professional wrestling.

 
Beer Money vs. Team 3D (Tag Team Championship title match)

Tenay accuses West of spending the previous night in the hotel bar with James Storm doing 12-ounce curls. West says that it was his birthday, and where the hell was Tenay? Awesomeness! Devon and Storm start. Loud chants of “We want tables!” Storm kicks out at two, and Roode tags in. Roode gets a two-count on Devon, and Ray tags in. Ray and Roode exchange punches. Roode goes for two clotheslines that have no effect, ducks one from Ray, and hits a flying forearm on Ray. Ray delivers several stiff open-hand slaps to Roode’s chest. Storm and Devon tag in. Roode crotches Devon on the ring post. Storm punches Devon on the mat. Roode and Storm fake a tag, and Roode and Devon go. Storm legitimately tags in.Team 3D hit the “Wazzup” on Roode. Ray directs the crowd in a huge chant of “Get the tables!” Storm cut off Devon on the floor. Roode and Ray go in the ring. The “Beer Money” salute was pretty loud too. The British Invasion comes down to ringside, to chants of “USA! USA!” The British Invasion sits at the announce table and comments, being quite friendly with Don West and antagonistic to Mike Tenay. Commentary from the British Invasion is great! Rob Terry climbs up on the apron to distract the referee, resulting in Ray climbing to the top rope and landing a flying body press on Terry to the floor! Storm tries to spit beer in the eyes of Team 3D, but misses and blinds Roode by mistake. Team 3D tries to capitalize and hits the 3D on Roode, but Rob Terry has distracted the referee again. Beer Money hits the Drinking While Investing (DWI) and gets the win! Huzzah!  

Winners and NEW TNA Tag Team Champions: Beer Money

JB interviews Kurt Angle in an empty locker room. Angle says he’s winning the belt. The Main Event Mafia will resume their position and they will all be celebrating.

World Heavyweight Championship match (King of the Mountain)
Mick Foley vs. Jeff Jarrett vs. Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Each competitor got a short video package prior to his entrance. Nice touch. Joe comes out wearing a Detroit Red Wings jersey. Angle comes out wearing a Pittsburgh Pengiuns jersey. Joe attacks Angle before the bell rings to start the match. The two referees announce that because of Joe’s actions, he starts the match in the penalty box, and Angle is eligible to hang the belt. Foley stands on the ladder outside of the ring while Jarrett and AJ work over Angle. Foley pulls Jarrett down on top of himself for a pin. Jarrett is now eligible, and Foley goes to the penalty box. Joe chokes out Foley with the Kokina Clutch, making Joe eligible and sending Foley to the penalty box again. Foley leaves the penalty box and shoves over the ladder that Joe stands on, and Joe lands on the legs of the ladder. Ouch! The entire ladder is bent and twisted. Joe hiptosses Foley into the ladder as Foley charges him. Jarrett tries to stand the ladder up, but it’s useless. Jarrett throws the ladder at Angle on the floor instead. Jarrett gets a new ladder. Jarrett, Angle, and Joe are eligible at this point. Jarrett sets up a ladder and climbs it, but Angle and Foley stop him. AJ stomps Angle and moves the ladder. AJ attempts a tornado DDT, but Angle blocks it and suplexes AJ into the ladder. JArrett tries to hit Angle with his guitar, but Angle blocks it. Angle gets Jarrett in the Angle Lock, but Jarrett uses his free leg to roll out and smashes Angle in the head with the guitar. Jarrett sets up a ladder and climbs it, with Foley coming up the other side. Foley tells Jarrett to give him the belt. Jarrett refuses, and the two exchange punches. AJ flies in, kicking over the ladder and knocking everyone to the mat. It’s Styles and Foley, Joe and Jarrett. Angle is out. Foley climbs up on top of the penalty box. AJ follows him. Foley teases a DDT off the box. Styles teases throwing Foley through the announce table. Foley throws AJ off the box and into the ring. Foley jumps off the box to hit an elbow on Angle. Foley gets a three-count, and Angle goes to the penalty box. Foley is now eligible. AJ is the only one who isn’t. AJ takes his Legends title belt off the announce table, hits Foley in the back with it, and kicks Foley off the ladder. Joe and AJ take turns working over Foley. Joe elevates AJ over the top rope to take out Foley. Jarrett runs into Joe with a ladder. AJ pins Foley on the floor outside. All five guys are now eligible, and Foley is back to the penalty box. AJ and Jarrett climb the ladder. The title belt falls to the mat as Jarrett and AJ exchange punches. Angle attacks Jarrett, who jumps off the ladder to DTT Angle. Joe and AJ fight. Joe climbs the ladder, but AJ grabs his foot and pulls him down. AJ tries to climb the ladder, but Joe stops him. Joe flies through the ropes to take out Jarrett and Foley. AJ tries to hang the belt, but Joe pulls him off and powerbombs him. Joe climbs one side of the belt as Angle climbs the other. Joe hands Angle the belt and Angle hangs it up. Angle wins, through help from Joe! The entirety of the Main Event Mafia comes out on the ramp, cheering as Joe and Angle hug at the top of the ladder.    

Winner and NEW World Heavyweight Champion: Kurt Angle

FINAL THOUGHTS: The Joe/Angle thing threw me completely. Peole who think that the opening X-Division title match had no psychology and no story and was a train wreck spotfest are completely wrong. Tenay and West should NOT be talking about how Raven and Abyss “aren’t afraid of dying in the ring” period, and certainly not just after Misawa’s death in the ring. Daffney took the thumbtacks bump! Is there anything NOT amazingly awesome about her?  Sting botched his reversal of Morgan’s Hellavator into the Scorpion Death Drop, and while he did get it back shortly, this should be kept in mind while he talks (yet again) about retiring this year. It’s understood that veterans often say that to gain concessions from the company in contract negotiations. One botched move at a ppv doesn’t mean that a person should be fired, but would that be acceptable for, say, Alex Shelley? Look, if Sting can’t go anymore, he can’t go anymore. Why the hell can’t Team 3D just lose? Honestly, do there have to be so many reasons set up as to why they lost the belts? Title defense in Japan, jet lag, just got to the building with no rest, cheating tactics of Beer Money, involvement of the British Invasion, enough! If anyone can win on a given night, just have a clean loss, already! 

This was a very solid ppv, and if the usual TNA bashing occurs tomorrow, it certainly won’t be because the show was awful. I paid for this show, and the opening match alone was well worth the money. Of four championship title matches, the first two saw the champions retain and the second two saw new champions crowned. There will certainly be a great deal of fall-out from all seven matches that could go in a number of interesting directions. Next week’s “Impact” should be something good. Check back with us next Thursday night/Friday for all your TNA “Impact” needs!

Peace out,
Drowgoddess