We started late. We ended early. That can only mean one thing – Jorge wasn’t here. G tries to avoid drowning in the flooded mess that is Calgary and JT’s personalities fight each other while Joe laments the drowning of his phone in his swimming pool yesterday. That Damn Double C gives us some good listening material in the form of a Sexual Harassment Education video. Mick Foley appears on The Daily Show. RAW wows us, even if Christian underwhelms Joe. Main Event is main-eventy, and SmackDown gets the depressed G treatment.
In the news, we get reactions to Rob Van Dam’s WWE return at Money In The Bank. We assess Sheamus’ ability to make metaphors. We ponder what Matt Hardy’s latest internet video means (besides a half-naked Reby Sky), and we find out how much money Jack Swagger will lose in fines over his recent marijuana arrest. Where have we heard Triple H and The Undertaker’s theme songs lately? We get HBK’s thoughts on the potential to revive tag team wrestling (courtesy of Ministry of Slam). All this, plus Iron Sheik Tweets and the all new segment, “Stump JT.”
We’re almost done with our series on WWE Pay Per View events. We’ve already discussed seven out of the 10 events outside of “The Big Four,” and after this week’s article on No Mercy, we’ll have just two events left to talk about.
I present my reasons against WWE No Mercy, after the jump! (more…)
For a secondary Pay Per View, Unforgiven has seen it’s share of big matches. It even got a cool new match associated with it last year, the Championship Scramble. Still, it’s not making the cut of my reimagined WWE Pay Per View Calendar.
I present my arguments against WWE Unforgiven, after the jump! (more…)
ECW is LIVE in Las Vegas, and we’re LIVE with our coverage. You know the drill by now, and since I’m starting late I’m going to skip the detailed explanation and get to work!
Evan Bourne def. Chavo Guerrero in a Cyber Sunday qualifying match.
Finlay def. John Morrison in a Cyber Sunday qualifying match.
Well, after successfully predicting No Mercy earlier this month, I thought I’d give TNA predictions a shot. I don’t expect them to be super accurate, because you never can tell what these TNA bookers are going to do…
TNA Championship: Samoa Joe (C) vs. Sting
Joe is gonna kill you… With the “no rematch” stipulation added this past Thursday on iMPACT, I don’t really expect to see Sting winning this – Joe’s just not ready to be pushed out of the main event.
Kurt Angle vs. Jeff Jarrett (Special Enforcer Mick Foley)
I don’t think we’ll see Angle win unless Foley turns on Jarrett. Since he’s new on the scene, I don’t know if I see that happening – but at the same time, I can’t see why Foley would be on the side of the young guys in this whole “respect” thing. Unless something drastic happens though, I’m taking Jarrett in this one.
Monster’s Ball Match for the World Tag Team Titles: Beer Money Inc. (C) vs. LAX vs. Team 3D vs. Matt Morgan & Abyss
Quite frankly, I can see any of the four winning. I expect to see Beer Money get their asses handed to them, but somehow manage to retain their titles.
The Steel Asylum Match
Not sure who’s going to be in this match, but if they found somebody to replace Kaz in the role, I wouldn’t be surprised if Suicide debuts tonight and wins the match. If not, I’m not sure who would be in this match, let alone who might win.
TNA Knockouts Championship: Taylor Wilde (C) vs. Roxxi vs. Awesome Kong
Given recent events, where Taylor Wilde’s been feuding with The Beautiful People, and Roxxi’s been getting over on Kong, I’m going to give the nod, and JohnnyCraze if you’re reading this, remember that this is only a prediction, to Roxxi.
Christian Cage vs. AJ Styles vs. Booker T
I have no idea where they’re headed with this one. Let’s say Cage.
X-Division Championship: Shiek Abdul Bashir vs. Consequences Creed
I can’t stand the Bashir character. That said, he’ll probably retain.
I won’t be around for the PPV tonight, but if you’re watching it, enjoy!
– Special Thanks to readers Adam Halverson and Brad Laird:
SMACKDOWN:
– Vicky and Chavo Guerrero begin the show in the ring in her wheel chair wearing the neck brace. The crowd is drowning them out as they are talking about Undertaker’s loss to the Big Show. Big show comes out and talks about beating taker, and a video is shown from No Mercy. Big show talks about facing Triple H, Vladimer comes ou saying he should get a shot. Big Show threatens him and Vladimer leaves.
– Brie Bella defeated Natalia (with Victoria) with help from Hornswoggle.
– R Truth interview with Funaki, we learn Funaki’s real name.. cut to Triple H texting – Hardy comes in says he wants winner of Triple H vs. Big Show.
– R Truth defeated Shelton Benjamin in a short non-title match.
– Jeff Hardy defeated MVP with a swanton bomb but Kozlov came out and delivers a head butt of doom on him then stands over Hardy.
– Special ring announcer Maria. Carlito and Primo Colon and Jesse and Festus defeated Curt Hawkins, Kurt Ryder, Kenny Dystrka and Ryan Braddock. Fetus with the flapjack for the win.
– The Great Khali vs. 3 jobbers. They aired a video about the Jackass encounter. Khali wins. Khali does kiss cam. He picks a bigger girl from the audience and asked her how much she weighed.
– Triple H brought back the kiss cam girl and brought her in the ring.
– Triple H vs. The Big Show ended in a no contest. Lights go out and taker shows battles show to the back. Kozlov comes down attacks and head butt of doom on Hunter. Jeff Hardy comes to make the save and they take out Kozlov. Hardy then delivers a twist of fate on Hunter.
Will NostroJOEmas strike again a la Night of Champions, or will I fail miserably like I did when I predicted The Great American Bash? We’ll find out, because here are my WWE No Mercy predictions!
WWE Championship: Triple H (C) vs. Jeff Hardy
I thought for sure that Jeff cost himself the WWE Championship when he was removed from a flight for appearing intoxicated a few weeks back, but with reports that Hardy is not facing any diciplinary action, and the fact that he’s been booked to look strong on TV since the incident, I could be wrong. However, the other thing that the last couple of weeks have said to me is that Vladimir Kozlov is next in line to face Triple H, and as such, I fully expect a no contest tonight with Kozlov standing tall at the end of it.
World Heavyweight Championship: Chris Jericho (C) vs. Shawn Michaels in a ladder match
I just can’t see HBK winning this match, given that there’s going to be a number one contenders match on the card featuring two guys that have heat with Jericho. By hook or by crook, Jericho wins this one.
ECW Championship: Matt Hardy (C) vs. Mark Henry
With this prediction, I’ll officially be declaring that I don’t expect a world title to change hands tonight. If Mark Henry was destined to be champion after No Mercy, they would have had him retain in the Championship Scramble at Unforgiven. Sorry Mark, I’m glad you got a pretty decent title run, but it’s the elder Hardy’s time to shine.
The Undertaker vs. The Big Show
It’s been pretty widely reported that The Undertaker is in pretty bad shape. He’s likely going to need some time off to let his injuries heal, so I’d venture to say that something will happen tonight to have ‘Taker written out of the story for a little bit. As such, I predict a Big Show victory.
World Heavyweight Championship #1 Contenders match: JBL vs. Batista
Batista is going to take this one. Not taking anything away from JBL but with Jericho likely to win the ladder match tonight, I’m fully expecting Batista to be the number one contender.
Kane vs. Rey Mysterio – if Rey loses, he loses his mask
Rey Mysterio is one of the most popular superstars in the WWE among a few key demographics, particularly the younger set. Unless the publicly traded WWE suddenly decided that they’re making too much money off of Rey Mysterio replica masks and want to unload what’s left of them at rock bottom prices, I’m fairly certain that Rey Rey is winning and keeping his mask. What is this, WCW?
WWE Women’s Championship: Beth Phoenix (C) vs. Candice Michelle
Let’s go with Candice… BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Yeah, Candice is going to win this match. Candice, whose return match was luckily taped because the WWE can’t edit botched spots out of live broadcasts, is NOT winning the Women’s Championship. Bring on the Fabulous Moolah meter, because there’s virtually nobody on the roster right now who deserves that title more than The Glamazon.
Yes folks, with ECW’s move to 9PM starting tonight, we’re now able to bring you ECW on SciFi in Real-Time! This is going to work the same as the real-time SmackDowns, in that we’re going to have quick results on the main page and detailed results after the jump!
Teddy Long announces Miz, Morrison, and Mark Henry vs. Ricky Ortiz, Evan Bourne, and Matt Hardy for later tonight.
Jack Swagger def. Lenny Lane
Mike Knox def. Tommy Dreamer
Mark Henry, The Miz, & John Morrison def. Evan Bourne, Matt Hardy, & Ricky Ortiz
Next week, WWE SmackDown moves to MyNetwork TV! Tonight, Jeff Hardy and Triple H team up to take on The Brian Kendrick and MVP, while Vladimir Kozlov takes on The Great Khali. All this and more, coming up at 8PM on the very last edition of WWE SmackDown on the CW!
You know how it works by now; quick results up here and full results after the jump! This page will be updated throughout the night so keep your finger on that “refresh” button!
Triple H & Jeff Hardy def. MVP & The Brian Kendrick via pinfall.
Maria & Brie Bella def. Victoria & Natalya via pinfall.
Vladimir Kozlov vs. The Great Khali went to a no contest when Triple H and Jeff Hardy got involved.
Chavo Guerrero def. Jimmy Wang Yang via pinfall.
Carlito & Primo def. Ryder and Hawkins to win the WWE Tag Team Championship!
Undertaker gets to Vickie after taking out Chavo and luring away The Big Show. He drops her with a Tombstone, leaving the last image of SmackDown’s tenure on the CW Network as The Undertaker standing over a fallen Vickie Guerrero.
It’s the 800th episode of Monday Night RAW! Confirmed for tonight’s show, Miz and Morrison take on Cryme Tyme, Evan Bourne takes on Kane, and Beth Phoenix takes on Kelly Kelly.
Sort of detailed results (I’m not up for full play by play at the moment); after the jump! (more…)
