BoredWrestlingFan.com

Hello, everyone!! Tonight’s RAW Review is going to be written similar to last week’s, mainly because it’s easier for me.  I should be able to bounce back next Monday.  Anywho, tonight, Randy faces Edge and John Cena goes one on seven against the Nexus!! What’ll happen!?

We kick off RAW with a flashback of last week, where John refused to shake Wade Barrett’s hand, and how the RAW GM made the matchup for tonight.  You all remember that, right?  No? Ah, well…  Oh yeah!  I almost forgot RAW had a theme.  We haven’t seen it in a while.  Oh, and the mom from The Brady Bunch is the guest host… Whoever she is… I already forgot her name.  Oh!! It’s a six-on-one handicapped match!!  Thanks to John kicking Darren Young’s ass last week, he can’t compete.  Shame.

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR SCOOBY DOO!

Cena starts by thanking the WWE Universe, then thanks the WWE Superstars who helped him last week.  It was missing a white flash, white lightning, a white kid with red hair.  Sheamus.  Eventually, Sheamus will have to remember that they’re all in this together, but Sheamus will have to realize that Sheamus is not going to be the WWE Champion, because he’s going to lose it to John in the Steel Cage Match.   Insert some Irish jokes, and then how Sheamus became WWE Champion twice.  In a Steel Cage Match, no one can interfere, which is more important.  He gets on a real roll about his match tonight when Nexus comes out, wearing… the most retarded shirts ever.  I’m just sayin’.

Barrett says that they could go tot he ring and beat the living daylights out of him, but it’d be too easy.  So, they’re going to wait until later on when everyone can watch them.  They can do whatever they want with a clear conscience, because Cena brought it upon himself.  Cena and Barrett are about to start arguing with the GM sends an email: Mr. Cena.  Based upon your blatant disregard for my instructions, if any Superstar gets involved in the match tonight, they will be suspended for 90 days.  Futhermore, the Nexus must tag in and out tonight. If they don’t abide by that rule, they will be suspended for 90 days as well.  Barrett points out that Cena’s going to be in that ring all alone.  Cena says that he may lose, but he’s going to take a few of them down with him tonight.

<COMMERCIAL>

@Niki_Sushi  White flash, white lightning, the pale kid with the red hair… Why not Sheamus McDonald? #BWF #RAW

@TKeep123  Loved Cena calling them “NNNnnnnnnNNN” !! RT @Duce102694: Nexus is out w/ the ugly N Shirt #WWE #Raw

Eve is ringside and going on commentary for the Diva’s match.

Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox vs Gail Kim

Actually not a bad Diva’s match… Would have been better had Alicia actually hit her intended target with her finisher, but whatever.  Eve on commentary was kind of… uninteresting, no matter how much I like Eve.

Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox wins by pinfall.

After the match, the RAW GM sends an email.  He said that since Alicia faked an injury last week, Eve gets another chance at the Diva’s Championship this Sunday at Money in the Bank.

<COMMERCIAL>

@divadirt  Alicia vs Eve announced for Money in the Bank… TWO Divas matches this Sunday! OMG!

The Hart Dynasty and Natalya vs The Usos and Tamina in a Six Person Tag Team Match

During this match, we’re finally told about the guest host, though no one really cares.  Tyson’s getting some good momentum early in, but Tamina shoves his foot off the rope to give…. whichever one it is the advantage.  Sorry, but I didn’t hear the na- Jimmy was the one who got the advantage.  David Hart Smith gets in and snatches the momentum back for the Hart Dynasty.  He went for a cover, but Tamina pulled him off.  Then Natalya got her out of the ring.  The Usos steal the momentum back and take the win.

The Usos and Tamina win by pinfall!

Barrett is talking to Chris, thanking him for teaching him.  Chris congratulates him, and then is stopped by Josh, but he walks off.  Nexus then gangs up on Yoshi Tatsu, who stares at David Otunga before Otunga beats him up a little.  Tarver then hits him a few times and gets in his face for no apparent reason.

<COMMERCIAL>

@jcenadotcom  Did anyone buy that beatdown by Nexus on Tatsu?

It’s a new day! It’s a new generation!!

Maryse and Ted DiBiase make their way out to the ring, and we’re reminded that Maryse helped to distract John Morrison last week so that DiBiase could steal the win.  Ted introduces them as the Million Dollar Couple, then clarifying that he’s referring to himself and the Money in the Bank briefcase.  He tells Maryse to imagine the possibilities after he wins the briefcase: he’ll shower her with gifts and will win the WWE Championship.

Now listen, this ain’t no make believe!

John Morrison says that he wouldn’t waste his time showering Maryse with gifts, because everyone knows the French don’t take showers.  Maryse proceeds to say something in French, and Morrison just says OK and translates it as: everyone in the arena has hippo breath and smells like dueling rhinos in the Serengeti plains.  And that Maryse herself resembles a dung chewing platypus.  She goes to slap him, he blocks, and DiBiase attacks Morrison.  DiBiase went for Dream Street, but Morrison countered.  he beats on DiBiase for a minute and then goes for Starship Pain, only for Maryse to pull DiBiase out of the way.

<COMMERCIAL>

@TKeep123  OK, I have to admit that Dibiase DID trade UP with Virgil Version 2. #wwe #RAW #BWF

@kickoutblog   New rule: you can’t hate John Cena for his silly promos and then cheer for John Morrison after that. http://bit.ly/RAW71210

Oh, God.  We come back for some retarded Brady Bunch sort of segment with Santino and Regal both looking for tag team partners… Santino’s squares are Kozlov, Khali, and Goldust.  Regal’s are Ryder, Primo, and a Doink wannabe.  And there’s the mom from Brady Bunch.  She gives Santino an apple pie (FLORENCE HENDERSON! That’s her name).  Santino makes some dumb joke and canned laughter is given.  She asks if Santino’s team is ready, and he says yes.  More bad jokes and canned laughter, and Regal comes in with the most intelligent comment of the night: I just want to let you know how utterly ridiculous this is.  Regal says that he’d go to her for advice on how to raise six annoying children, and he’d go to the Partridge family for other advice.  She slaps Regal and shoves him out.  Santino goes for a kiss and she stops him, heading out.

OH YEAH!!! Miz booted Truth out of the Money in the Bank PayPerView!!!  Who’s going to take his place?  We find out tonight!!!  We get a flashback to Wrestlemania 21 in 2005 where Edge won the first ever Money in the Bank match.  And then to ten months later, at Revolution 2006, where Edge cashed it in against John Cena to get the WWE Championship.  Next up, Randy Orton faces Edge!

<COMMERCIAL>

@_UncleDave  Whats the purpose of a raw guest host, seriously? Oh yea, to help save a career of a z-list star. #raw

You think you know me…

Edge vs Randy Orton

I love both Edge and Randy… So I’m seriously hoping this is a great match.  Because I need something to wipe out that damn Brady Bunch segment…  At any rate, Edge gets early momentum, which immediately goes to Randy.  Randy holds tight to that momentum, beating  on Edge before going to the cover, only for Edge to kick out at two.  Randy keeps it for a good while until he throws Edge back into the ring and Edge greets him with a boot to the face.  Edge looked like he was setting up for a spear, then lookled like he was setting up a punt, then just kicked him in the head… went for another, but Randy countered with a scoop slam and started to get the momentum back, but Edge snatched it by throwing Randy between the top and middle ropes.

<COMMERCIAL>

(Just ’cause it made me laugh…)
@ThingsColeSays  BREAKING… WWE has signed Paul Heyman to be the 8th man in the Raw MITB match, just to keep him away from TNA.

@AustinH_24seven   Randy Orton: 50% tattoos, 50% RAGE #WWE

We come back, and Randy seems to have gotten some momentum back anyway.  Edge hits him with a drop toe hold though and beats on Randy for a minute before putting him in a head lock.  Randy seemed to be about to go out there, but countered and dropped Edge to the mat.  Randy grabs the momentum back and hits a scoop slam.  The ref tells Randy to get Edge back in the ring, but Edge manages to counter and attacks Randy.  He goes for a cover, but Randy kicks out a two.  Edge sets up for a Spear, but Randy kicks him and goes down, prepping for the RKO.  Edge counters, goes for Spear, Randy jumps over him, covers Edge, Edge kicks out, and Randy hits a back breaker.  Randy drops and starts pounding on the mat only for Jericho to come out and distract Randy.  Edge takes advantage and pins Randy for the win.

Edge wins va pinfall.

Jericho climbs into the ring after the match and hits Edge with a Code breaker, Randy hits Jericho with an RKO, and Evan comes out to beat on Randy.  Evan goes for Airbourne, but Randy hits the RKO in mid air.

Skip Sheffield is walking, and Josh Matthews stops him to talk about Nexus showing up on NXT tomorrow night, asking if they’re going to focus on the pros, rookies, or both.  Morrison gets shoved or something, I missed it, and then Nexus surrounds Morrison.  Morrison attacks, but Nexus gets the upper hand and throws Morrison into some doors.  All of Nexus gangs up on Morrison and throws him into one of those big boxes that the Spirit Squad got thrown into back in the day- Wait, what’s that?  A Glee reference?  Says who?!  Dolph?  Oh, fine.  Anyway, they all stand over him as the camera fades.

<COMMERCIAL>

@TKeep123  Evan Bourn will think twice about another run-in on Randy Orton! Pretty amazing! #WWE #RAW

@Niki_Sushi  When Randy Fucking Orton RKO’s Evan Bourne mid-Air Bourne, you KNOW you’re fucked. #WWE #BWF

@shot_of_flair   My entire first page on my twitter feed just proved to me that huge boners were had with the SSP-RKO reversal. #WWE

@TKeep123  Orton’s RKO on Evan ranks up there with Jericho’s Codebreaker as a counter to both CMPunk & Mysterio coming off the ropes. #wwe #RAW #bwf

AWESOME!!

The Miz makes his way to the ring with a mic. My favorite part of the night.  He mentions how everyone is talking about how they’re going to win Money in the Bank.  Well, talk is cheap.  We get a flashback to last week when Miz brutally attacked Truth (Did I say brutally?  I meant beautifully…).  He says that he’s never been more serious in his life.  And he took out Truth with his bare hands, not a ladder.  He didn’t just take away his ability to compete, he took away his ability to play catch with his son, his ability to entertain.  Let’s face it, wherever Truth is, he’s not dancing. This Sunday, when Miz has the ladder in his hands, what he did to Truth will pale in comparison to what he’s going to do to his other opponents.  One down, six to go.  Because he’s The Miz and he just got interrupted by the GM, that bastard!!!  Cole asks if he can have everyone’s attention, and they all scream no.  The GM Says: The Miz will now compete against R-Truth’s replacement.  See, there’s an old saying: Just when you think you have all the answers, I change the questions.

Somebody’s gonna get their ass kicked… somebody’s gonna get their weave split.

The United States Champion The Miz vs Mark Henry

I have to admit, I’m disappointed.  I wish Mark Henry would split Alicia’s weave…  Anyway, Miz goes for Henry pretty enthusiastically, but Henry is having none of it.  Henry goes for outside of the ring, but Miz moves last second only for Henry to run into the podium with the laptop to communicate with the GM of RAW.  Miz throws a basket of some kind on him, then dumps trash all over Mark and throws the trash can at him.

<COMMERCIAL>

@dreamsinstatic   R-Truth replaced by the Kool Aid man. Oh YEAH! #WWE

@B_alpha_male   The ‘Worlds strongest man’ just got taken out by rubber trash cans. #WWE #RAW

Dear God… Alright, now we’re going to see Florence Henderson out here as the Special Guest Ring Announcer.  She says she’s feeling groovy, and NO I AM NOT FEELING GROOVY.

The Regal Bunch: William Regal, Zack Ryder, Primo, and Doink the Clown vs The Santino Bunch: Santino Marella, Vladimir Kozlov, Goldust, and the Great Khali in an 8-Man Tag Team Match

Okay, so… Flo stole Regal’s cloak, Santino finally hit the frigging Cobra, and Doink was tagged in.  Doink uses a squirt gun to spray Khali, but Khali didn’t like it much, and pins Doink for the win after a smack to the head.

The Santino Bunch win via pinfall!

The music stops and Santino goes over to Flo again, but she ducks under him and goes to Khali.  they kiss, and Santino is heartbroken…  And I just threw up a little in my mouth… Khali picks her up and they kiss more, and I die a little inside….

@TKeep123  Ok, this Bradey Bunch tag match has potential to be a Royal mess…. Doink? Reminiscent of The Oddities. #wwe #raw #BWF

@aemckay   Khali, you smoothie. Florence Henderson, you slut. #WWE #RAW

The Money in the Bank line up: Smackdown: Matt Hardy, Cody Rhodes, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, The Big Show, Intercontinental Champion Kofi Kingston, Christian, and Kane.  RAW: United States Champion The Miz, Mark Henry, Randy Orton, Edge, John Morrison, Ted DiBiase, Evan Bourne, and Chris Jericho.

Josh talks to Edge about how psycho Edge basically is.  Edge says that he has a voice that talks to him and what not… I had this part typed out, but my computer decided to delete it.  Evan’s with a trainer, and Sheamus shows up.  He asks if the RKO messed Evan up, and then Nexus shows up.  Sheamus looks nervous and says that Bourne was bragging about how he helped jump them last week.  Insert Nexus beating up Bourne now.  Sheamus kneels next to Bourne and says that that’ll teach him a lesson, won’t it, fella?  Nexus comes back and looks at Sheamus.  They start after Sheamus, but Sheamus runs, and asks where Cena’s locker room is before taking off again.

<COMMERCIAL>

@iwcmvp   Josh Matthews is the leader of The Nexus #WWE

Nexus vs John Cena in a Six-on-One Handicapped Match

Reminder: If anyone helps Cena, they’re suspended for 90 days.  If Nexus doesn’t tag in and out, then they’re suspended for 90 days.  It starts with Cena tearing Tarver up.  Tarver tags in Justin Gabriel.  Gabriel rolls over to tag in Skip Sheffield after taking a slight beating from Cena.  Cena and Sheffield are having a match of strength before Sheffield shoves Cena into the corner.  Cena manages to wiggle out before Nexus all get out of the ring and huddle up for a minute to rethink their strategy.  The ref is yelling at them to get back up on the apron.  While the ref is distracted, Heath Slater attacks him from behind, and Sheffield beats on Cena., throwing Cena into his corner.  Slater is tagged in, keeping Cena in the corner as Nexus beats up on Cena while Slater distracts the ref.  Slater keeps hitting Cena pretty hard with some suplexes before tagging in David Otunga.  Cena fights back and manages to get some hits in on other members of Nexus before Otunga gets him again, suplexing Cena.  Cena manages to drop Otunga, and then Wade Barrett is tagged in.  It looks like John was saving his energy for Barrett, but Barrett hits Cena with a boot to the face.  He got Cena up in a Fireman’s Carry, but Cena got out, beating on Barrett with some shoulder take downs before hitting the Five Knuckle Shuffle on Barrett.  Sheffiled tags himself in as Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment on Barrett.  Sheffield hits that clothesline, then tags in Otunga.  Otunga hits Cena, then tags in Gabriel, who pulls Cena closer to the corner and hits the 450 Splash, and goes for the cover for the win.

The Nexus wins via pinfall.

Nexus celebrates in the ring afterward, and Barrett makes them all back off.  Cena uses Barrett to stand up before punching Barrett and running for a chair.  He takes out Slater and runs into the ring.  Nexus scatters outside of the ring and gets Slater.  Barrett pulls them all back together to strategize, and they surround the ring again.  Cena’s bleeding here, by the way.  Nexus surrounds the ring, but Sheamus comes in with a chair too, losing it in his hurry to beat on Nexus.  Cena and Sheamus clear the ring with their chairs, finally working in unison.

Not a bad show tonight, overall.  Guys, next week, use the #BWF hashtag in your tweets so that I can put you in the RAW review, alright? Thanks!!

Terribly sorry everyone, but I feel like crap.  I don’t know what’s wrong, I’m just exhausted and what not.  So, thanks to that… I’m going to be shortening the RAW review to the bare minimum.  Just the important parts and the matches/who won.  So… yeah.  Here we go!

According to the commercial that came on about five minutes before RAW did, Eve has invoked her rematch clause for the Diva’s Championship against Alicia Fox, and tonight, we’ll find out what the mystery General Manager has in store for Nexus.

We start of RAW with Nexus (and Wade Barrett this week) standing in a line in the ring.  Wade says attacking Vince McMahon was just part of a bigger picture.  Sheffield says that they attacked Ricky Steamboat and the Legends just for fun, which wasn’t why they attacked the others.    An email from the GM says that he’s decided on a punishment for Nexus for their attack on Vince: None of the Nexus can compete for a WWE Title until further notice.  Furthermore, the ruling of Nexus members not being able to touch WWE Superstars and vice-versa has been lifted.  Cena comes out, followed by Randy, Truth, Evan, John Morrison, and the Hart Dynasty.  the Superstars are attacked by Sheamus, Uso’s, Ted, Jericho, Miz, and Edge.  Nexus has disappeared.  The faces are left standing in the ring.  Sheamus says that the heels don’t want to help him.  Randy says that he and Cena will never be friends unless they have to, and says that they should finish what they started with the seven heels.  An email from the GM says that if they want action, they’ll get it.  All eight members of the Money in the Bank Ladder Match will be against one another in singles competition.  Cena will face Barrett tonight, but it won’t be a match.  The GM want Cena and Barrett to call a truce.  Cena says that instead of calling a truce, how about he knocks Barrett’s teeth out.  GM says he needs Cena to be the bigger man and he trusts Cena to do the right thing, or else his  actions will be met with the appropriate consequences, and… that’s the bottom line, because the GM said so.

<COMMERCIAL>

John Morrison vs Ted DiBiase with Maryse

Maryse sits ringside and calls Cole out for calling her a gold digger.  I’m actually a little amused by her, especially that she answered the phone during the match, and just insults Cole.  It makes me laugh.  Anyway, she jacks Morrison’s jacket and distracts him so that Ted can get a cheap shot… or four?  DiBiase hits Dream Street for the win.

Ted DiBiase wins by pinfall.

Santino and Vladimir Kozlov make their way to the ring (“Italia and Russia together again! Like World War 2! Except this time, no Nazis.” – Santino Marealla), and later, John Cena and Wade Barrett are supposed to call a truce… yeah right.

<COMMERCIAL>

Slam of the Week: Vladimir Kozlov defeats Santino Marella and then beats up William Regal after Regal attacks Santino.

Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov vs William Regal and The Great Khali

Regal calls them oxygen thieves before the match even starts and makes me laugh.  Regal calls Khali a monster, which makes me roll my eyes… At any rate, Kozlov demolishes Regal, then tags Santino in, almost getting in trouble, Santino gets demolished by Regal, and Kozlov pins Regal.

Vladimir Kozlov and Santino Marella win via pinfall.

After the match, Khali climbs in the ring, and tells Santino and Vladimir to stand Regal up, and just knocks him in the head.  Khali and Santino, and Ranjin, dance, and Vladimir wonders where his days of glory went off to.

Later on tonight, Edge brings Chris Jericho and Evan Bourne to The Cutting Edge, as well as information on Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat and the other Legends after last week’s assault.

<COMMERCIAL>

Arn Anderson says that Ricky’s attack was serious.  Sheamus shows up and mocks Anderson, essentially, calling him a pathetic old man.  Anderson says that they have to get out of the way of their egos and work on Nexus, or the company, and their careers, are going to go up in flames.

<COMMERCIAL>

United States Champion The Miz vs R-Truth

Miz come sout to Truth’s theme and is rapping, which made me die… It was hilarious.  Before the match even starts, he starts beating on Truth, while I’m still laughing my ass off…  Anyway, Miz just goes off on Truth’s arm.  The bell never officially rang, but for my ego’s sake…

The United States Champion The Miz wins… by ass-kicking.

<COMMERCIAL>

The Cutting Edge: Money In the Bank Pay-Per-View Edition

Edge makes his way to the ring, set up with ladders, and the Money in the Bank briefcase.  He says that he’s smarter than Randy and everyone else there.  Why make seven enemies, when he can make seven powerful allies?  They just need leadership, which he can provide.  He goes to call out Evan Bourne, but Jericho comes out instead.

Jericho says he doesn’t take a back seat to anyone, and that Edge is shamelessly pandering to Nexus.  He was Wade Barrett’s pro, and that helped him win the season.  Chris told Barrett to make an impact, do something never done before.   Edge rubs the loss to Evan Bourne in, and Jericho rubs Edge’s loss at Wrestlemania in.   Edge starts to give Jericho a history lesson, but Edge just wants to be Jericho, according to Jericho.  Edge gets sick of Jericho and attacks him.  Jericho attacks back and puts Edge in the walls of Jericho, but Evan comes out and hits Jericho.  Then, he jumps over a Spear, ducks under both of them, and flips right out of hte ring.  Then the GM sends an email.

The GM says if the audience want to see some action, give him a HELL YEAH.  So, they’re clearing the ring of The Cutting Edge stuff, and the following is going to take place.

<COMMERCIAL>

Edge and Chris Jericho vs Evan Bourne and Randy Orton

Starts off with Orton and Bourne getting some really good momentum, and then Jericho turns it around right before the commercial break.  When we come back, Edge still has the momentum over Bourne, mostly thanks to Jericho beating Bourne during the break.  Randy almost had Jericho set up for the RKO, but Edge interfered and Jericho manage to hit the insigari.  Bourne gets tagged in, and Jericho starts to yell and berate Edge, so Edge spears him.  Bourne hits the Air Bourne for the win.

Randy Orton and Evan Bourne win via pinfall.

Afterward, Randy hits an RKO on Evan, and smirks toward the ramp.

<COMMERCIAL>

Randy walks backstage, and Nexus stops him.  Otunga says that nothing was against Randy, but the WWE Championship match at Fatal 4Way was just to make a statement.  They’re trying to apologize, and they won’t interfere in the Money in the Bank Ladder Match, but they can’t promise anything for the steel cage match.  Otunga says he wants Randy to think about hit next time Cena tries to recruit him.  Randy says he’s heard what they have to say, now get out of his face.

During the previous commercial break, the GM emailed and said that the Hart Dynasty would defend their Unified Tag Team Championships against The Uso’s.  The Uso’s and Tamina tell Josh Matthews that this is the opportunity of the lifetime.  They say they’ll be the new Tag Team Champions, and next week, everyone will know what the Uso’s and Tamina are all about.  Alicia seems upset that she hasn’t been interviewed once since she became the Diva’s Champion.  She asks if it’s because she’s not important, or because he doesn’t care what she has to say, and the WWE Universe says that, yeah, she’s pretty much right.  Anyway, next is the Diva’s Championship match.

<COMMERCIAL>

Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox vs Eve Torres for the Diva’s Championship

Pretty standard Diva’s match, with Alicia faking an ankle injury to get Eve off guard to retain.

Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox retains via pinfall.

<COMMERCIAL>

The GM says that next week, Edge and Randy Orton will go one on one.

Wade Barrett makes his way to the ring as we get back from the commercial break.  Wade says that he wants Cena to come out so they can shake hands like men.

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RUBBER FOOD!!!!

Cena comes out and starts checking for Nexus.  He gets in the ring, still looking for Nexus.  Wade says that Cena is not in Nexus’ future plans, regardless of what they’ve done.  Barrett wants to put everything in the past behind them so that they can move on.  The simple fact is that the Nexus Seven are going to be there for a long time and can make his life easy, or a lot harder than it has been.  The choice is Cena’s.

Cena asks, if they shake hands, it stops?  No more looking over his shoulder?  Cena says that the anonymous GM wanted to do this truce, but Cena needs to know if Barrett does, and he needs Barrett’s word.  If they shake hands, this stops.   Cena holds his hand out, and Barrett goes to shake it, but Cena pulls his hand away and asks why stop when they’re having so much fun?!  Cena says take your truces, handshakes, future plans, blah blah blah, crumple them, and stuff them up your Nexus.  The future is that Cena takes down Nexus, whether he does it himself, has help, he gets to every single one of them.

Barrett says that the fact that Cena is even capable of standing in the ring is a testament to, basically, how it isn’t about him.  Barrett is warning Cena: Shake his hand, or Cena will face some very, very severe consequences.  Cena grabs his hand, then starts to get him in an Attitude Adjustment.  The Nexus Seven come out, but then dso does Evan Bourne, John Morrison, Mark Henry, Khali, Goldust, Kozlov, Santino, the Hart Dynasty, Yoshi Tatsu… and I think that was all…  it got hard to tell.  Sorry.  Basically, Nexus is then shoved out of the ring, except Darren Young, who got bitch slapped by Mark Henry.

The GM sends an email: I wanted peace, so if things don’t stop now, there will be consequences.  Cena puts Young in the STF.  The GM sends another email: Cena, because of your actions, you will now face all members of the Nexus next week in a seven-on-one handicapped match.  Cena then begins hammering away on Darren Young again.  Cena then throws the “steel” ring steps at Darren Young’s head, throws Young over the announce table, and then shoves the announce table over on Young.

Next week, I guess we’ll see more of the Nexus.  Until then, seeya around.

Calling all Bored Wrestling Fans!

This is it! The show before the go-home show for the “Victory Road” pay-per-view. Will what we see tonight persuade us to spend our hard-earned money and/or three hours of our time on TNA’s offering on July 11th? Find the nearest line and cross it, and you tell me!

Hey everybody!  Sorry about the lack of a RAW review last week.  I had some computer troubles.  But, I have a new laptop now, and I’m back in business.  For more frequent updates as to why I’m not doing what I’m supposed to, make sure you follow me on Twitter: @TheMizMagnet.  This week, Rob Zombie hosts!!  Not only that, but what are the consequences supposed to be for the NXT Rookies attacking Mr. McMahon?  What about this new GM?  Who the hell is he… or she?!

Last Monday, the NXT Rookies surrounded Referee!Vince in the ring and then violently/brutally, whatever you wanna call it, attacked him, leaving him motionless in the ring as they all stood over him.

We start off RAW with no theme music.  We’re told that we know nothing so far about Vince’s condition, but we’ll be updated if anything new is discovered tonight.  Also, the NXT Season One Rookies want to be called Nexus, and Wade Barrett is at WWE HQ to plead his case and what not.  The new anonymous General Manager says that the Nexus’ actions would be met with the appropriate consequences.

It’s a shame that they lost their heads, a careless man who could wind up dead...

Sheamus comes out to the ring and says that he watched the footage of Nexus beating Vince several times and he has to say he’s disgusted.  He’s disgusted about what went down. So, as the WWE Champion, he felt it was his responsibility to make a statement on behalf of the company: the champ is here.  Even though the Nexus lads got involved in his match, eveyone knows he would have beaten Cena regardless, and he would have proved he’s worthy of the Championship.  He knows it’s unfortunate when it happens, but one important thing came out of it: Cena’s not the #1 Contender for the belt, and why? because he used his rematch clause. It means that he no longer has to look at the tacky orange t-shrits, no longer does he have to listen to the never-give-up slogans, and no longer does he have to listen to the WWE Universe chant “Cena” every week like parrots.  No longer does he have to listen to Cena make fun of his beautiful Irish skin by calling him a human jar of mayo. He hates Cena. Cena can get to the back of the queue, like everyone else, because he’s through and he’s never gonna get a shot at Sheamus’ gold ever again.

BRRRRRRRRRRRRR SHABADOO!!!!

Cena makes his way to the ring and just stands there for a couple minutes, grinning and listening to the crowd.  Sheamus asks him what he’s doing there, and says that he’s not going to get another shot at him or his belt again.  Cena says that he knows and he didn’t come out there for that.  He came out here to ask for help.  Everybody here saw how Sheamus won the Championship, everyone saw how he kept it. It’s the group calling themselves Nexus. They made a target out of him because he was the WWE Champion, and they’re coming after the human jar of Mayo, Philly’s own giant block of cream cheese, the WWE Champion, Sheamus. Cena says he’s gonna cut to thee chase: They don’t like each other. Sheamus is tough as nails and can fight.  Wanna keep the championship? His career? Then help Cena right now.  They are going to start off RAW the way they should, for one night only, they fight, side by side, right now because Cena’s calling out Nexus, and they’re gonna start off RAW with a brawl.

However, an email sound comes on and Michael Cole stands up and says that he has an email.  He’s like the new AOL guy: Welcome. I’ve got mail!  Anyway, the email says, and Cole quotes (though I don’t, because that was a lot to type at once with Cole’s voice giving me a migraine), “I’ll wait until next week to take action agaisnt Nexus. I will allow spokesman Barrett time to present his case to WWE Officials. However, as far as tonight is concerned, if any membner of that group makes any contact with any WWE Superstar, they will be terminated.  However, if any WWE Superstar initiates contact, they will be suspended.”

Cena thanks the anonymous General Manager.  He says that it’s not a total loss, because they’ve learned something about Sheamus. He’s not just pale skin, and he’s a good dude.  Honestly, he’s a pretty good guy.  Sheamus was thinking to himself that they should have started RAW with a brawl, but, since they can’t, they’re thinking that they should start of RAW with a WWE Championship match!

The email sound comes again and Cole repeats that he has an email.  None of us are, apparently, intelligent enough to know what that sound means.  This email says that the WWE Championship, Sheamus will be in action tonight, but it’ll be against Mark Henry.

Cena explodes here (metaphorically speaking.  Sorry to disappoint some of you).  He claims his life is being ruined by the internet, and he hasn’t freaked out this bad since his mom cancelled his Warcraft subscription.  He says that the GM should email him directly… at… candypants264@gmail.org.  He goes on, but Cole has to tell us he has an email, so I missed it.  The email says that in three weeks, there is a new PayPerView called Money in the Bank, where the winner will receive a contract for a WWE Title match that they can cash in at any time.  You know, the same stipulations participants get at Wrestlemania.  He says that the eight participants for the RAW match will be revealed later tonight, and he would like to demonstrate.  Sheamus says the General Manager can demonstrate all he wants, because Shemaus has wasted enough of his time there and he’s out of there.  In the ring, the cage starts to lower.  The email goes on and says that since last week’s title match ended inconclusively, Sheamus will face John Cena at Money in the Bank for the WWE Championship in a Steel Cage match.

<COMMERCIAL>

Six Person Tag Match: The Unified Tag Team Champions David Hart Smith and Tyson Kidd with Natalya vs

As the Hart Dynasty comes out to the ring, the Usos come out and lay the Hart Dynasty out.  They start to go back up the ramp, but Tamina runs down and throws Natalya in the ring, hitting her with the Superfly Splash.

Backstage, Josh Matthews asks R-Truth what actions he thinks should be taken against Nexus.  Truth says that they’re behaving like wild, untamed animals.  He says not to fire them because that’s too easy.  He tells Josh to leave them there at the WWE Zoo, where he’s the zookeeper.  And that’s the Truth.

<COMMERCIAL>

Vladimir Kozlov vs Santino Marella – If Santino wins, then Vladimir will be Santion’s tag partner

Vladimir is already in the ring, and this match is pretty quick as we move through Santino entering the ring.  Santino goes for a lot of moves, Kozlov just brushes him off, blah blah blah, Kozlov ends up pinning Santino.

Vladimir Kozlov Wins!

Kozlov seems to be amused as he keeps helping Santino up only for him to fall back down.  He starts to head up the ramp when William Regal comes out, shakes Kozlov’s hand, and then runs into the ring and attacks Santino.  Kozlov goes back into the ring and attacks Regal.  Then, he carries Santino right out of the ring and up the ramp.

Backstage, Josh Matthews interviews The Great Khali, asking him what actions he thinks should be taken against Nexus.  Khali says something, but Ranjin Singh just says that Khali says that he’s a big, stupid giant and his manager is really tired of protecting him.  If Nexus were to come up right now, Khali would run.

<COMMERCIAL>

Tomorrow night, the second season of NXT gets their first votes!!

Tonight’s guest host is a five-time Grammy nominated musician, a screen writer, a producer, and actor, he’s Rob Zombie!  He’s also the anniversary guest host, so to speak, for this is one year to the week of the first Guest Host!  Rob Zombie says he’s there because he loves sick and twisted things, like the sick and twisted things that go on in the ring, like Money in the Bank.  He’s there to announce the Money in the Bank Ladder Match participants for RAW: Randy Orton, The United States Champion, The Miz, R-Truth, Chris Jericho, Evan Bounre, Ted DiBiase, John Morrison and… this guy.

Edge shows up on the TitanTron and says that he hasn’t talked to Rob Zombie since he dumped his entrace theme.  Rob Zombie says that he wants to set the record straight.  He took his song back because he couldnt’ stand to have Edge destroy it.  He starts to leave the ring and Edge asks him if that’s it.  Did he scare away the horror director, the astro-creep? All that matters is that he won the first ever MitB, and cashed it in on Cena and won his first WWE Championship. Don’t we remember that? Why doesn’t he remind us?

<Video Package: WrestleMania 21, 2005: Edge wins Money in the Bank. 10 Months Later, Revolution 2006: Edge comes out to cash in Money in the Bank & wins WWE Championship against Cena>

Yeah, Edge did that. He did it and he had so much fun doing it, that he did it years later against the Undertaker. That’s what he was talking about last week when he speared Orton and said now the fun begins because Edge owns Money in the Bank. And he’s gonna show everyone just how twisted he can be ’cause you wanna know what happens when a Viper runs into a guy with a 20 foot ladder? The Viper gets his head crushed before he can strike. And Edge is going to do that to every other participant in that match, and at the end of the match, they will all be staring up at him.

The infamous email sound comes up and Cole says that tonight’s main event will feature all eight Money in the Bank participants in an Eight Man Tag Team Mega Match!  Edge, The United States Champion, The Miz, Ted DiBiase, and Chris Jericho will face Evan Bourne, John Morrison, R-Truth, and Randy Orton.

Next: Mark Henry v Sheamus

<COMMERCIAL>

WWE Champion Sheamus vs Mark Henry

Mark Henry comes out with his rookie, Lucky Cannon, who goes backstage right after.  The match starts with Sheamus gaining control until Henry shoves him.  Sheamus and Henry exchange hits (if you wanna call it that), and Sheamus hits Henry with a DDT.  He goes for the cover, but Henry kicks out a two.  Sheamus drops his knee on Henry’s face, and then hits his chest a few times before going for another cover.  Henry kicks out at two again.  Sheamus gets Henry in a headlock, but then gets backed into a corner.  As usual, Sheamus goes for Henry’s knee and tries to take him down with clotheslines before Henry hits one.  Henry hits a splash a minute later, and goes for a cover, but Sheamus gets his foot on the rope.  Henry gets up, and Sheamus hits him with whatever his boot move is called, and then covers Henry for the win.

Sheamus wins!

Josh Matthews is now backstage with Nexus.  He asks for their reactions to the General Manager’s ruling.  Tarver says it goes both ways.  They can be fired for attacking a Superstar, but the Superstars will be suspended if they attack Nexus.  Besides, Nexus can still make an impact.  To prove this point, Skip Sheffield seems to think it’ll be sufficient to knock out some tech guy who probably pissed his pants as soon as Sheffield looked at him.  Darren Young says that’s what they mean, and Nexus laughs.

Still to come, our Eight Man Tag Team Mega Match!

<COMMERCIAL>

“Money” by I Fight Dragons is the official Money in the Bank theme!

Jerry Lawler is in the ring and says that tomorrow, a new DVD will be out.  Before he says who the DVD is about, he wants to show us something.

<VIDEO PACKAGE: The Life of Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat”>

Ricky Steamboat comes out, and Jerry says that a few more guys in the back want to say something.  Arn Anderson, Dean Malenko, Mike Rotunda, and Micheal P.S. Hays come out to honor his career.  They all say some really graet things about Ricky.  When Steamboat goes to speak, the Nexus theme hits and they all come out.  They surround the ring and then start to take out the legends in the ring one by one until it’s just them and Steamboat in the ring.  Steamboat manages to put up a pretty good fight for about thirty seconds before Nexus overpowers him, and we see the same crap we’ve seen for what seems like forever now.

<COMMERCIAL>

Reminder!  Nexus just attacked the legends!  Another reminder!  The Superstars can’t attack Nexus or they’ll be suspended, which is why no one helped the legends!  Realization: With Jerry gone, we now have to listen to Michael Cole scream “VINTAGE” and wet himself all night… Joygasm.

<COMMERCIAL>

Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox & Maryse vs Gail Kim and Eve Torres

Lucky for me, if you wanna put it that way, Michael Cole is joined by Josh Matthews.  Anyway, Alicia and Eve start, some hits are exchanged, blah blah blah…  I got really distracted by whatever Alicia was wearing, so all I know is that eventually, Gail came in and was doing pretty good, but something happened and Alicia hit an axe kick on Gail and won it for her and Maryse.

Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox and Maryse win!

Next up is the Eight Man Tag Team Mega Match!

<COMMERCIAL>

Reminder!  Last week, Nexus attacked Vince!  Reminder!! About fifteen to thirty minutes ago, they attacked WWE Hall of Famers!  Next week our slacker GM will determine the fate of Nexus.

Eight Man Tag Team Mega Match
The Rated R Superstar Edge, Chris Jericho, The United States Champion The Miz, and Ted DiBiase with Maryse vs R-Truth, John Morrison, Evan Bourne and Randy Orton

Just because I’m having a moment and I don’t want this to go straight to the commercial thing, I’m going to have some theme song fun!!

You think you know me…

Break the walls down!!

Now listen, this ain’t no make believe!

*Airplane noises*

I hear voices in my head, they council me, they understand, they talk to me…

<COMMERCIAL>

DiBiase and Morrison start it off.  DiBiase gets Morrison into the corner and Irish Whips him, but Morrison counters and throws DiBiase down.  He gets DiBiase into a headlock and then moves to his corner, tagging in Truth.

Truth slaps DiBiase, who returns it witha  punch. Truth then throws DiBiase over the top rope and tags in Bourne, who jumps off the apron and right into DiBiase before throwing him back into the ring.  A few hard kicks get DiBiase off his feet.  Bourne goes for a cover, but DiBiase kicks out at two and tags in Miz.

Miz gets flipped by Bourne almost immediately, and Bourne goes for a cover only for Miz to kick out at two.  He punches Bourne and hits an Irish Whip, only to get hit by a kick to the face.  Bourne slams into Miz and goes for the cover again, only for Miz to kick out at two.  Bourne throws Miz across the ring and runs at him, only to get Miz’ shoulder in his face.  Jericho distracts the ref as DiBiase hits Bourne.  Miz tags in Jericho.

Jericho kicks Bounre and then drops him into the bottom rope, hitting a baseball slide to kick him out of the ring next.  Edge drops down and hits Bourne while Jericho distracts the ref, and then Jericho goes out to throw Bourne back in.  Jericho mocks Bounre before he pulls Bourne to the heel corner and tags Miz back in.

Miz stomps on Bourne a few times before putting his knee in Bourne’s spine.  He then plants his knee in Bourne’s spine, lifting Bourne’s head, before slipping into a headlock.  Bourne fights out and Miz goes for a suplex, but is kneed to the head by Bourne, who tags Morrison back in.

Morrison hits Miz with two clothesline, then Irish Whips him to a corner, hits a flying chuck, and sets up Starship Pain only for DiBiase to pull Miz out.  Morrison jumps over the top rope and takes both out.  He goes to throw Miz back in, but Jericho distracts the ref and Edge attacks Morrison.

<COMMERCIAL>

During the break, Jericho rammed Morrison with a ladder and then feigned injury.  Jericho and Morrison are still in the ring, but Morrison falls out of the ring after taking some blows from DiBiase.  Jericho brings Morrison into the ring, and Morrison manages to cover Chris, who kicks out at two and in turn, covers Morrison.  Morrison kicks out at two, and Jericho tags Edge in.

Edge knees Morrison in the gut, and Morrison fights back, hitting Edge a few times.  Edge hits a drop toe-hold on Morrison, and holds onto Morrison’s ankle, pulling him back into the heel corner.  Morrison starts to fight back, and Edge tags in DiBiase.

DiBiase hammers away on Morrison as soon as he gets in.  When Morrison tries to get some momentum, DiBiase hits him with a scoop slam, locking a headlock on Morrison after.  DiBiase then tags in Edge.

Edge flings Morrison into the corner, and Morrison kicks Edge only to get a big boot to the face.  He goes into a corner and prepares for the Spear, but Morrison gets out of the way.  Edge pulls Morrison back, and Morrison manages to hit an insagiri on the back of Edge’s head.  Both are down before Edge tags in Jericho, and Morrison tags in Bourne.

Bourne hits a hurricanrana, then a missile dropkick, countering Jericho’s Irish Whip and hitting Jericho with some high kicks.  He goes for a cover on Jericho, but Jericho kicks out at two.  Bourne goes to the top rope, and Jericho is right behind him, hitting him.  Jericho attempts a suplex, but Bourne gets his knee in Jericho’s face and pushes him down.  Bourne goes for Air Bourne and misses it, instead hit with the Codebreaker.  Jericho ends up having to tag in DiBiase as Bourne tags in Randy.  Orton hits the RKO as soon as DiBiase is close enough.

Randy Orton, Evan Bourne, John Morrison and R-Truth win

After the match, Edge runs back into the ring and attacks Randy from behind.  He also brings in a ladder.  Truth goes in to help or something, but is hit by a ladder as well.  John Morrison and Evan Bourne kick the ladder, sending Edge flying backward.  Jericho attempts a Codebreaker or something, but Evan knocks him out of the ring.  Morrison helps Bourne onto the top rope, where he flies right into Jericho.  Meanwhile, Miz takes out Morrison back in the ring with a Skull Crushing Finale.  With the ring cleared, he sets up the ladder in the middle of the ring, starting a slow climb up it.  Before he can grab the briefcase, Randy comes in and pushes it over, sending Miz right into the ropes.  Randy then sets the ladder back up, climbing it and taking the briefcase for himself.

Overall Thoughts: Not too bad a show, though I don’t care what Nexus has planned anymore as long as they stay off my screen with it.  Seriously, I’d rather watch Mark Henry try to rap again than anything else they have to do.

Welcome, welcome, welcome. When the big events come, they call in the big guns. The Howard Finkel of BWF, if you will. I’m back, for my first appearance since Jan 4th. See? What’d I say about Big Time events? With superstars like Bret ‘Hitman’ Hart, Shawn Michaels, Triple H and the Undertaker appearing, you’d think it was 1997. But, it’s 2010, and we are LIVE from Phoenix, Arizona.

Tune in, after the turn, for LIVE, unedited, uncensored, and Pro-HBK coverage of WrestleMania XXVI. Oh, and a quick note for Jack Korpela. Why do you have a job?

Welcome to another edition of the BWF Roundtable.  I am JT, your host for the evening as we look at the TLC pay per view.  Joining me tonight are BWF writers Drowgoddess & Tharvey1 along with fellow BWF follower RYTMAN.  Well without further ado lets get this show on the road:

Wow it’s been two weeks already, boy does the time fly.  But I guess that’s what happens when you are busy.  Well I’m back to talk more about random nothing until I take another week off, when that will be I don’t know yet.  Well without further ado let’s get this party started:

Your Empress of “iMPACT” is sleepy. Very, very sleepy.

What’s up everyone.  Hope everyone had a happy and safe Halloween.  I sure did, maybe a little too much fun.  Well let’s get this show on the road so I can go back to nursing my hangover: