Tag Archive: Steel Cage

  1. WWE RAW 2/3/14 – Punked Out

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    Well.  We can pretty much assume that CM Punk will not be on RAW this week.  Will his absence leave a noticeable mark on the show?  I guess there’s only one way to find out.  Go watch it, you lazy bastards.  What?  It’s my job to write about this show and tell you these things so you don’t have to watch it yourselves?  Alright fine.  Let’s go.

    I watch this show so you don’t have to suffer through it.  That’s because I think you’re awesome.  Unless you’re Richard Sherman.  How much shit are you talking with an injured leg?  Guess you’re limping to DisneyWorld, huh bitch?

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  2. WWE RAW 1/13/14

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    While we wait impatiently for the launch of the WWE Network, we have to get through 7 more Monday Night RAWs, including this one and the one on February 24th.  Roddy Piper tweeted out some cryptic messages regarding tonight’s RAW, so let’s see if anything comes of that.  Let’s go!

    Blah blah blah you know what we do here.  Shut up and read it.

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  3. WWE RAW 20th Anniversary 1/14/13

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    Welcome everyone to Monday Night RAW!  It’s the 20th Anniversary of this show, which is an impressive feat for any show, let alone one that airs every single week of the year.  I expect a solid show.  No wait, no I don’t.  There’s going to be another “Rock concert” tonight.  The last one sucked ankle biting rat dog balls.

    I watch 30 minutes of the show, leave for work, then watch the entire show at work whilst reviewing whatever WWE puts on my TV.  And I make shit up as I go along too, because that’s what the RAW writers do.  Let me entertainment you!

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  4. Pintnoir reviews Impact Wrestling – 3/15/2012 (A match for Anderson)

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    We open with Steve and Bobby walking into the arena (from separate entrances of course). For some reason Roode step out of the pyro room which makes me wonder. We get a vignette of Roode vs Sting going into Victory Road this Sunday.

    James Storm our official TNA redneck comes out to make an inring promo about his eventual confrontation in a steel cage with the aforementioned Roode. I smell a slobber knocker coming this April. Just as Storm’s finishes Bully Ray comes out. He taughts the #1 contender tellling him that he won’t make it to Lockdown. And just when we think a fight is about to break out Ray calls out Gunner to take his licks. After a couple of punches the security groupies rush the ramp to separate the two, during the insueing ruckus Ray gets in a cheap shot.

    Another Bobby Roode vignette about Sting.

    Madison and Gail argue about losing the tag titles which they really weren’t defending, but i digress. They confront Sting who tells them that he’s busy dealing with Roode. He sets up two matches Gail vs Mickie and Madison vs Velvet Sky, Rayne’s match is next.

    Madison Rayne vs Velvet Sky:

    Madison composes herself on the ramp before cutting into her Killer Queen gimmick, which by the way needs to change but “hearts” to her anyway. Velvet comes out next shaking her pom poms and just as she is ready to staddle a rope for pigeons, she darts toward Rayne spear first. Early on Sky has the advantage with her assorted moves of doom until Madison gets the upper and due to a ref who can’t keep his hands off the knockout. Then the crowd gets behind Velvet which comes out like a druid chant for a death march. I laugh and die on the inside. No offense to the Madison haters but I’m behind her as her move set and more diversified. Anyway after a rollup by Sky which is reversed into another roll up with tights for the win.

    Crimson is smug backstage bragging about the win over the two Robs, which is as brag worthy as breathing. After Morgan questions Crimson’s motives about winning belts and making money they head out.

    Samoa Joe vs Crimson:

    A short match to show that Crimson/Morgan are on the same page and another loss for Joe with Magnus looking weaker even by comparison when he attempts to attack Morgan on the outside only to get irish whipped into the ring post.

    Austin Aries comes out and shows his X division champion reel and brags about being the longest reigning X Division champion exceeding the previous record of 182 days set by Christopher Daniels. Celebrating aside out comes Zema Ion, after some exchanges about breaking necks and nut hair growth, Ion gives the toast right before he throws a drink in is face. Aries answers back by dousing Ion in the hole bottle ruining his pretty hair.

    Gail Kim vs Mickie James:

    There was promos with Sting going on about crowing and craziness but ehh. Mickie and Gail continue to prove their previous WWE stint match was a fluke which they have been trying to allevate through superior matches. This one is no different. After Gail messes with Mickie’s knee we have a methodical attack which culminates with Mickie making a comeback but Kim out smarting her with a belt to the face. she scores the win. heel syle.

    We have a watercooler or Lemonade talk according to Anderson about his involvement with AJ Styles. Daniels is curious why he’s taking Styles side which I had the same question because the story looked to be going good til last week. When Kazarian went from unwilling pawn to bitter assistant to all an out heel which now makes this story seem trite. But we have a match between the Daniels and Anderson to hype.

    Daniels vs Anderson:

    Anderson knocks off some ring rust with Daniels as he seems to not miss a step. Daniels bumps like a madman. Anderson and Daniels battle and during the melee Chris cuts his cheek. Kazarian comes down to the ring to distract Anderson only for AJ to come to the rescue Daniels gets up only to take a mic check. Anderson wins and prepares for Victory Road.

    Jeff Hardy prattles on about Angle being an Olympic gold medalist. and his creatures. Speaking of Angle

    Garett and Angle have a five minute challenge match which I assume (and you know what they say about assuming) will make Bitchoff (not my words but Angle’s) look good. And I guess that old adiom about is right not only does Garett look good but it also hypes Hardy vs Angle this Sunday when Hardy comes out to save Garett when Angle who’s angry about not beating Garett in time locks him in the ankle lock.

    The Two Robs are interviewed by Wonder Years and talk about the upcoming open invitational. Yeah TV title on the line and the person is random. Here’s to an eventual title change so we can have some actual competiton. One can hope right.

    James Storm vs Gunner:

    Here are two back woods southern wrestlers on the opposing sides of the heel/face tangent. What we have so far is a good match between two competitors with Bully Ray egging on the Gunner. But Gunner gets the job done and by that he takes a Last Call to the face. Making James Storm look strong going into Victory Road.

    Sting and Bobby Roode have their contract signing which is where Roode rips into Sting with all his worth for a good 8 minutes. All the while Sting sits patiently listening untl Bobby turns to leave. Sting flips the table over kicks over the chairs and puts on his makeup and attacks the champion. And while beating on the Roode he applies his trademark black paint to Roode’s face. After Roode scurries out of the ring face ashen from the paint sting gets enpowered by his attack.

    Well here’s to Victory Road.

     

  5. Smackdown 03/09/12

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    As the road to WrestleMania continues, tonight John Laurinaitis is taking over control of Smackdown. And with that, we can only expect madness, chaos, and certainly not Drew McIntyre… because he was fired. Or was he? Only time will tell, so let’s hop to it… shall we?
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  6. PatMan Picks Stampede Classics. British Bulldogs VS. Cuban Commandos. Steel Cage!

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    Its time again for more retro wrestling favorites from Calgary, Alberta, Canada! A few weeks ago I featured a 6 man tag team match featuring the British Bulldogs & Don Moraco. This time, we will take a look at a great match that took place only a few weeks prior to that event. The Stampede International Tag Team champions, the Cuban Commandos, had been fighting off the title hungry British Bulldogs for about a month, doing what ever it took to remain champions.This involved cheating, getting counted out , using foreign objects and being disqualified on numerous occasions. These matches drove the crowd absolutely nuts every time as Stampede fans anticipated their returning heros, and former world Tag Team Champions in the WWF, to win the titles with ease. They did not. These matches were all leading up to, of course, a match where the Commandos were confined to an event with no rules , no where to run and no way to win by cheating.  A match inside a solid steel cage!  Enjoy the match and I will return with more classic wrestling from the Stampede promotion.  Check out more PatMan picks over at www.wonderpodonline.com and also check out our year end  videogame podcast ! But, “In the mean time, and in-between time, that’s it. Another edition of Stampede Wrestling”!

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  7. Impact Wrestling or how I see TNA in theory pt 1

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    The news has been hitting the fan for weeks and now it was finally confirmed on May 12th. TNA is now Impact Wrestling. Watching the event unfold before my eyes as The Network, Mick Foley proclaimed “Impact is wrestling” telling Hogan and his cohorts that the politics have ended. I smiled as I thought of a happier time in TNA history. The year was 2006, as I was streaming through all the on demand selections skimming the porn and sport selections, I was stopped in my tracks by a wrestling event called TNA: No Surrender. What could this be? And better yet how much would this cost?

    Well folks for $24.99, I watched a company impress. Jackass antics aside TNA gave me some intriguing matches. LAX w/ Konnan vs AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Senshi vs Chris Sabin and the wrestler who left a impressive mark…Eric Young. Wearing his white tights with a censorship bar over the word “Fire”.  It would continue to impress next month when I watched Bound for Glory. Eric Young was there so was Daniels/AJ, LAX and the match of the night Chris Sabin vs Senshi. A four star match that left both men forever immortalized in my brain.

    I became a fanatic. I bought “The Best of the X Division” 2 pack, watched TNA Impact on Spike, where Christian was speared through a steel cage by Rhyno. Mouth dropped as I watched the end of a feud that left Christian victorious albeit Rhyno was avenged. Then after a year I went away every once in a while I’d stop in to see how the program was progressing. And then 2010 happened and I see Hogan on my screen in a four sided ring telling the audience that big changes are about to unfold. I was unimpressed. All I saw was old dudes (ea friends of Hogan collecting a paycheck) I lost faith and didn’t look back for about six months or so. When I returned all was  the same except some of the old dudes remained. Namely Hogan and a Silver haired Bischoff. Now TNA had become WCW: 2010 with endless promos to open the show followed by two minute matches then right behind that would be more promos and another five minute match. The endless cycle was monotonous. That is also when I became a devotee to the Internet Wrestling Community. Reading how much folks would argue with one another over what was the definition of TNA or how whether or not the veterans were either hurting or bettering the product was astonishing. I didn’t know how to respond, depending on what site you’re on it could be the difference from being called a troll or mark. People attitudes were as intense as the old comic book argument of who was faster Superman or the Flash.

    Now here we are in May, TNA has decided to push wrestling over promos. What went through my head was all the talent that are on the roster and all the epic matches and smaller lead ins using the reaction cam could bring to the overall product. Taking the best of 2002-2009 and mixing it with what was decent or innovative about 2010-2011(so far).

    Here’s where my wrestling theory kicks in.

    After Sacrifice and Slammiversary, iMPACT Wrestling should start building up the future while deconstructing the past year and change.  First should come the end of Immortal. Not right away but with Hogan’s power null in void we can watch as the group slowly implodes. Leading to either Hogan or Flair taking on Impact caretaker Sting. In a loser leaves Impact Wrestling at Bound for Glory.

    That is the end result of Bischoff/ Hogan regime, but before that in the three months leading up to that landmark moment we should see the X division wrestlers get their revenge on Bischoff. July 10th is Destination X. We should see the division rise from the ashes like a phoenix. Led in part by Max Buck and Brian Kendrick, who documented performance in the ring and outside of it has shown that they could definitely steer the course of the next generation of talent. This of course could allow Kaz to get back into heel territory were he does his best work.

    Kaz as a man surrounded, relentlessly holding on to the X gold . Kendrick, The Bucks, Sangrieto and Suicide all jockeying for his title. By giving these characters personalities the fans will care. Bring in Traci Brooks as his right hand woman snagging him victories against them.  Use the Reaction Cam in short (and by short i mean two to three minutes) explaining their reasons for participating in the X division using each wrestlers personality to showcase how they differ from each other. This would add to the importance of the belt. More could be added with the World X Cup. More on that on another article. This of course is a small sample of the thoughts running through my mind. But then it jumped to Orlando Jordan.

    Orlando Jordan. Yes, that Orlando Jordan. When he first debuted he represented someone different than the stereotypical “black” wrestler, he  wasn’t a gang banger,pimp or extremist militant. He was instead a bi-sexual male who wanted to wrestler and be accepted by his peers. At first he was entertaining and then became a joke of epic proportions. With his brain damaged partner/lover? Eric Young he has become one half of a dreaded jobber team. There for simple entertainment. Nothing much else. I’m more offended by this then by John Cena’s playful middle school comments. Here is someone who came in with an original idea for a wrestler and has been given squat. Instead what they should do is put him in singles territory with a female valet. What has So Cal Val been up to in the past two plus years?  Secondly have Bully Ray make Orlando Jordan’s life miserable which leads to a feud for acceptance. The simplest promoter could conceive this.

    And then it touched on Eric Young. Again. Here is a man who when presented with a gimmick he takes it and runs with it. No matter how asinine. He is a good little soldier and follows orders. But where has that positioned him? Earlier in 2009-2010 he was being pushed as a leader. A heel leader in charge of World Elite. You couldn’t help but think of a man who would of brought great feuds to the forefront. Especially against former tag partner Robert Roode. Then he fell off the turnbuckle onto the floor below and now we have “Idiot Savant” Eric Young. The dream had been crushed. Where can he go from here? Simple. Last Thursday, Eric Young stole Gunner’s Television title. I could see a swift kick in the head would straighten Eric out to fight for the former Global title. Maybe even a three way between him, Gunner and Daniels. The thoughts ceased for a bit.

    What was presented was this somewhat garbled article that I hope to continue in a serial format. Giving you sneak peeks into my brain in regards to the Television, tag team and World title picture. Even the Knockouts brought something to mind. But for now I better slow down before I have a novella on my hands.

    Part 2 should be on its way soon.